How Places Affect Us

[Casey_03]

This is a follow-up to my earlier thread about having a meltdown yesterday. I've realized that just being back in Moscow, where I lived for nearly a decade and racked up a lot of bad memories and some good ones, is really taking its toll. When i first arrived back I burst into tears, and being here has made me super anxious the entire time. being here just makes me want to run away. I never expected it to have such an impact on me. Although there are a lot of good memories here, it just reminds me of so many failed relationships and failures in general. I feel like I have to flee before I completely lose it. Does anyone else get hit this hard just by being in a certain place?

 

[illusionist]

Oh yes, even hearing the accent of people from that area can instill the fears and emotions of that time. I find it very hard to cope with when I go back to visit. My hypervigilance goes through the roof and takes a while to recover when I return home.

 

[shimmerz]

I never expected it to have such an impact on me.

Does anyone else get hit this hard just by being in a certain place?

Yes, absolutely. I didn't realize until after I had left and felt the sense of relief .... when I came back it hit me like a ton of bricks.... 'WTF was I fighting to be in this area for?????'

Sometimes it takes a contrasting situation to realize how something is truly affecting us imho.

 

[Spiderallis]

There's certain parts of town I just won't go to. I won't even pass through those areas to go other places. It took me a while to figure it out. I had to be there a few times before understanding what I was reacting to.

 

[Anarchy]

The dissociative compartments in my mind are very place dependant. Places bring out their own set of feelings and memories.

Very often, when i am in one place, I don't and perhaps can't think of the people, feelings and memories that are related to other places.

I realized that I have place related compartments, back about 1996. I've only accepted since last August, that I've probably had C-PTSD for most of my life, and the concept of dissociation has given me a tool to better understand the compartments, and why I forget about things like friends and things I said I would do, when I move from place to place.

I think my compartments come from dealing with being at boarding school (21 sentences of 3 months each, in a total institution. at least most prisons don't torture you with seeing outside and the knowledge that you soon have to go back in).

I've never thought to ask anyone close to me, whether I become "different" when I'm in different places or with different people, whether the disociative partitions affect my identity as well as my memories and mood.

Hope this helps

@

 

[Ocean5]

Does anyone else get hit this hard just by being in a certain place?

Yes for sure. I can't even return to my hometown. While I live far away now - thousands of miles. When I'd visited use to have my mom meet in city 2 hours away. Even an understanding Aunt told me - it's probably best not to return there for what it would do to me.

I didn't realize until after I had left and felt the sense of relief .... when I came back it hit me like a ton of bricks...

Yes sense of relief and safety. Then a ton of bricks and fear. Reason I stopped.

 

[Sammyiam]

I live only 15 mins from where I grew up and see my abuser nearly every couple of weeks. It drives me crazy I only drive through if I really have to. I head the other direction to go shopping just so I don't go through my home town. I have tossed it over and over about shifting away, but I really love my little house and my business and my friends that I have here and I just think why should he take that away from me to. He has already taken much of my life away from me, the last little bit is all I have.

 

[Gadgie]

I came into this thread as something happened to me yesterday, that really scared me. My wife passed away six months ago, and I'm still struggling with that.

I try and stay outside as long as I can, as I've spent the last seven years being a 24/7 carer for my wife, so never had a lot of opportunities to work in the garden. Yesterday I took a break from painting the fence outside, and came in for an afternoon cuppa.

Then this weird feeling came over me, left me believing that I was being watched, it made so uncomfortable, that I went back outside, as soon as I made my cup of tea, instead of sitting down and having a wee rest like I had planned.

That's the first time that has happened to me, I don't think I would like to go through that again, it was a weird thing.