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I feel guilty for taking care of myself

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EveHarrington

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Yes, I’m realizing this is a big issue for me.

I feel guilty for taking care of myself.

I feel guilty when I can’t push myself as hard as other people can.

I feel guilty for standing up for myself and saying I need to rest or I need a break or I just can’t do this right now.

I’m afraid of the consequences. I’m afraid of being rejected or punished.

I’m just trying to heal and all of this is mentally causing a roadblock.

I’m overly emotional right now and crying because I’m panicking over calling my PHP in a few hours to tell them I can’t make it in today.

Just looking for support I guess.

Thank you.
 
I am here and I hear your fear and loneliness. It too struggle with taking care of myself and trying not to feel guilty so I understand how difficult this can be. But when I have had the courage to "test out" the theory or distortion that otheres will rejet me or think me selfish, it has always proved to be flawed and others have respected me more. Thinking of you today ...
 
I think I innerstand. I feel guilty when I'm not well enough to do for others, mainly because I was always taught to put others before myself, no matter what.

Then I start getting good at taking care of self for a while, so I feel much better once I do and want to once again start helping take care of/do for/do with others, but I don't take into account all of the energy I'm spending in simply trying to care for myself behind the scenes to make it to the stage, so to speak.

Then I feel selfish, once again, because I need to bow out of what I've committed myself to so I can go back to my self-care and feel like I'm somehow robbing others of something/letting them down/proving my perceived unworthiness by not being able to be there. UGH!

Then the tornadic thoughts come and kick me while I'm down, convincing me I simply must be a bad person and I'm not worthy of the help I have available, so I turn away from it and myself for a while until the suffering gets unbearable again and I have to seek help.

It's a process and a vicious cycle that sucks the life right out of me at times.
 
Yes, I’m realizing this is a big issue for me.

I feel guilty for taking care of myself.

I f...
Hey, Eve, I'm sorry that this is happening to you. Yes, I've been there, done that, and wasn't even given the t-shirt for all my efforts. My T once told me to step back and to ask myself what I would say if this were happening to a child. Would I scold the child for not stepping up to the plate when she was tired/sick/discouraged/depressed? Or could I find it in myself to tell the child that it was okay, that tomorrow was a new day, that no harm was being done if she were to sit this dance out because there would be plenty more dances in the future.
Taking that point of view in this situation may seem foreign at first, but once you get the hang of it, you'll find it very promising. Wishing you all the best... ~Victory
 
I feel guilty for taking care of myself.

hugs.

I can relate to this. I still have a hard time meeting my own needs for comfort. It used to be a battle and I would lose because i just could not reach the object I needed like my blue bunny at night and it was right by my head.

I used to feel guilty for existing.

It takes time and learning more and more how to trust your instincts and yourself in meeting your own needs.

You will get this keep on trying and do not give up. It takes a while to get rid of old programing i have learned. I know that you push yourself yet you are having a hard time with this one. Practice something you need when you are able to do it. it takes time and practice.
 
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