I Have Started A Love Relationship

[Tanishq]

I am sorry Ms Spock. Did you both discuss about this forgetting issue?

 

[Froggie]

Feeling for you Ms Spock, that can hurt when someone you love forgets. Jaret is right, have you been able to discuss this issue with B ?

 

[ms spock]

Yes I did talk to B and he apologised again. He said to me that his Birthday isn't important to him, but that was why I tried to impress on him, Jaret, how important my Birthday is to me. It has brought up all my childhood abandonment issues and feelings of not being important.

B did do stuff for my Birthday. But he said he would take me to the beach for a picnic lunch and get me a Birthday cake and he didn't. I got myself a Birthday cake and he got lost in a whole lot of stuff that was going on.

 

[Bilby]

Oh Ms Spock :(

I'm so sorry he forgot your birthday. Nobody should have to buy themselves a birthday cake when they are in a relationship - it's a special time.

A very happy belated birthday to you!

Altogether now:

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday Ms Spoooooooooock,
Happy Birthday to you!

HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY!!!

:hug:

B x

 

[Tanishq]

It has brought up all my childhood abandonment issues and feelings of not being important.

Understandable Ms Spock. You have to take care of your triggers and many other things. I think he sounds bit careless. Telling someone else so many things especially for b'day which is huge for partner, making huge promises even knowing that you have some issues with memory and then forgetting it away can make things make bad. It has hurt you much.

how often he forgets? I am sorry, but I didn't like that b'day promise to take you somewhere to celebrate your b'day and he forgot.

He said to me that his Birthday isn't important to him

I think, you could ask him why his b'day isn't important to him.

:hug:

 

[ms spock]

It was abit careless. I am disappointed.

I am glad I bought my own Birthday cake though. I would have been so upset otherwise.

 

[ms spock]

B has said he will repeat things back to me so I know he has heard them.

I don't talk to my psychriatrist between sessions. That is not our deal. This week I wished it was, but it is good for me to contain stuff myself.

 

[ms spock]

A very happy belated birthday to you!

Altogether now:

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday Ms Spoooooooooock,
Happy Birthday to you!

HIP HIP HOORAY! HIP HIP HOORAY!!!

:hug:

B x

Thank you Bilby!

 

[Tanishq]

B has said he will repeat things back to me so I know he has heard them.

This is good from him.

Everything will be fine for you.

 

[ms spock]

Thanks Jaret,

I am not so sure at the moment. I feel abit raw and sore from it all. The things it brought up are my responsibility to deal with. So I will do this.

This week has been quite confronting for me as I am seeing more about myself. I have seen where I need to do quite abit more work on myself.

It wasn't the best week and I didn't go to class at one point but I got through.

 

[Nicolette]

I am glad I bought my own Birthday cake though. I would have been so upset otherwise.

Good for you Ms Spock.

My opinion on skimming the last few posts is that people in a relationship need to respect each others values. Anthony is not big on anniversaries for example but I love them so there is no need for me to get him anything however he knows it matters to me so he'll make me a special dinner, get a card and sometimes a gift unless agreed otherwise. If B's birthday doesn't matter to him then I would understand him feeling out of sorts if you showered him with gifts and making a big affair of his, but in turn, I would expect him to at least remember your birthday, ring, mail a card, see you or something.

So what if it's a childhood abandonment issue? I don't think your birthday mattering to you is something you need to work on; its reasonable IMO as the majority of our countries recognize the event.

Happy Belated Birthday.

 

[ms spock]

Thanks for the Birthday Wishes Nicolette!