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I Realize That I

I realize that I am so exhausted from the move and today the move is entirely complete. I realize that all of my planning paid off and I still have things on my to do list. I realize I need to go for the balance.
 
I realize that only by staying busy will I start to feel better. I realize that I am going to have to force myself to do this. I will get a feeling of accomplishment and satisfaction.
 
I realize that my anxiety has been sky high this past week.

I realize that I will need to just let this realtor do his thing about selling my house. Otherwise, I think we could butt heads. I realize also that I can nor will I beat myself up for being anxious. I have lived in this house for over 40 years, thus it truly is and will be a big change for me.

I realize that I needed to talk to someone about all these changes, so I did touch base with the counselor that I used to see. I seem to be at a different place now, so our appointment went okay and I have another appointment this month to see her.
 
I realize that I need to go to talk to someone at the bank tomorrow about all these changes that I'm looking at.

I realize that I need to allow my heart to grieve over all of this. I realize that I probably would not be doing any of this if I had any immediate family in my life. I realize I have been waiting and waiting my entire life for that, but it is time for me to do what I need to do for myself.
 
I went to the bank to talk to someone I know there. After sharing with her some of the comments that this realtor has told me, I realize at this time, that I need to hold off from dealing with him.

I realized that I was beginning to shut down from what I would say to him, and I realized that I don't want to feel that way in talking with him.

I am also grateful that I did take this step to talk to her.
 
I realize that my neighbor lady is not going to change. I realize that she is only one person that I have in my life right now that causes me much anguish. I realize that I need to keep in mind what her last husband told me of how he decided to leave her during a blizzard because he couldn't take it any longer.

I also realize that those things that have been troubling me in the past in the last several months, I have taken constructive action to make a change so that I am at peace.

Thus, I realize that my neighbor lady will turn her back to me when she sees me pull out of the garage and drive by her house, etc. I will tell myself, she is only one person and to stop taking it personally which right now is very hard for me to do because of how her behavior has affected me all these years!
 

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