Job Search And Anxiety.

[ground crew]

A year ago, after moving to a remote part of California for a job, I got fired. I was still recovering from a down and out 3 years earlier involving an accident, lots of pain, job loss and homelessness. So, things got better, I was working and then depression set in, resulting in job loss and homelessness last year.

Then there was this weird confluence of events, some really good VA intervention, work on my part I kept myself emotionally pretty level on average as the world flung me about. It eventually threw me into a start up (I got mad high tech skills) and started making money befitting a craftsman while living in a shelter.(!) I again stood up and was self supporting and thinking I was a founder of what promises to be a pretty successful company, they have a shortfall, I get laid off.

Son Of A B*tch!

I got a severance. I had nothing saved being that I am running double fast to keep up with back taxes and child support and car insurance and maintenance and oh yes, staying alive. So, I got a couple of months, maybe 4 more months, if I stop doing things like eating out and driving....

but I know, given my history, I am going to be bouncing about a bit emotionally at this time. So I am trying to be pro active. I have a good habit of workouts, daily. I am going to social activities,No, actually going! Not just planing too and then not going, or get to the door and let panic take you home.

I am doing a pretty good job of getting resumes out. I have had a lot of response... One I am very excited about, except it is more of the heavy lifting techy work in remote califorinia. If everything went great, that job is 6 to eight weeks out and I got a lot of time on my hands and that I think is what I am afraid of. Time to ponder and develop some really big stress balls to weigh me down and make me lay in a heap unable to move. unable to hope.

So, any thoughts on ways to get out without spending money, preventing isolation, depression and more trips to the shrink?

 

[Kefira]

It depends on what you like to do. Volunteering if you have time will put you in front of people and can help with depression. Picking something you're passionate about (animals, children, what have you) can also keep the loss of interest in everything at bay and can give you some stability of still having a schedule while you look for work.

I like hiking, going to public parks, being out in nature. If I don't want to interact with people directly but am lonely then going places to people watch can work and I can pick the place in terms of my ability to deal with crowds that day. Going to a place of worship if you follow a faith path (open meditation at zen temples has saved my ass before when I didn't have structure). Also depending on your location sometimes you can find community classes for cheap or for a work exchange.

I know you asked about getting out, but I think there's a lot to be said for keeping yourself on a schedule too and keeping up those good habits you've developed. At least that's one of the things that helps me most and it doesn't take any money, just self discipline and effort.

 

[ihateusernames]

Find somebody to take you out. Lol. I know that sounds ridiculous, but my friend was in a similar situation several years ago, suddenly lost a high paying job with no backup plan or savings, couldn't really even afford to put gas in his car. So I took him places and came to hang out and stuff so he wouldn't lose his mind. Other people did, too. I don't know how much of a support network you have there, but if you have one, lean on it. A lot of people like to feel useful. Like, really like it.

And aside from that maybe take up a new hobby or teach yourself something new in the meantime? I hope you find something great soon.

 

[ground crew]

Not much support, new in the neighborhood and worked too much to develop one. I keep getting nibbles on my resume, I have a new interview wed. so, the job search is going well. I just need to do something. I started divorce recovery class a week or two ago, 19 years ago I got divorced and I can already talk about it! Maybe I can mention the 10 year old one too.... And all this healing, I keep reading posts out here, bring me to tears. a lot. Does everybody with this shit have a strong empathic reaction to others pain or is that just part of my unique kinda krazy? I cant watch the news without tears, I assume i am not alone with this?

 

[ihateusernames]

I cant watch the news without tears, I assume i am not alone with this?

Nope, not alone. I cut myself off from the news years ago. I have most of my accidental contact with it blocked off, too. But some things slip through or are big enough to hear on the radio or in everyday conversation. :( I also have to take a lot of breaks from this site. I've got my notifications blocked so I'm not seeing and remembering all the time. I guess that's all sticking my head in the sand, but oh well.

 

[ground crew]

Nope, not alone. I cut myself off from the news years ago. I have most of my accidental contact w...

I have been wondering how healthy this is. I get triggered pretty bad on here. Maybe I should limit it, maybe 2 visits per day.

 

[ground crew]

So, got a report from the shrink in clinical terms today. I am a traumaed up mo-fo. Nothing like confirmation to reduce anxiety. Now I know!

But then there's the job search. Nothing good happened today!

 

[ground crew]

Getting dissociative. watched tv most of the day yesterday. depression is growing. I did get a call, contract to perm in the space ship buisness. Means I get to be re-exposed to aviation where i was for the big stressor. Gotta tweak or twork my resume to make me sound like an aviation genius to get a job that will make me crazy.... on the up side my lousy credit will probably exclude me from the position.... so I got that going for me.... Looking for the happy here and it ain't coming.....

 

[ground crew]

It took a while, the TV broke and that was a good thing. I have got my aerobics going agin, I am back to biking and it feels great. Then today, I got a call and I have been hire temp-perm at a company that does good things (for a lot of money)!! I am only getting middling money but I get to build and repair a system which when strapped properly to a paraplegic, alows them to walk! (Only in a theraputic environment surrounded by staff and therapists.... and did I mention it is frightfully expensive?) But it is not seal clubbing or dumping municipal waste into the bay or anything. So, Maybe I will be working and looking forward to a weekend at this time next week!!!

 

[Senecia]

You can do it!! You have the perseverance. It's hard but we're some of the strongest kinds of people out there. It will work out. Try to breathe, I forget to. Sometimes literally.