InsideAWord
Gold Member
Hello, my name is Kara and I am 23 years old. I would like to keep my trauma private for now until I feel more comfortable around here.
I'm reaching out to this community because, I'm sure as most sufferers know, I'm experiencing a lot of isolation and misunderstanding from my diagnosis. The trauma occurred a week before my twenty-third birthday, so around August 16th. The trauma lasted for about a week. I went to counseling about two weeks after the event because my family had no idea how to deal with me anymore. I was having daily panic attacks (around 2-3 times a day, sometimes while driving), agoraphobia, severe insomnia, night terrors, and I needed moderate to sometimes maximum support to even practice self-care. I was in a really bad place for about the first month.
Because the waiting list was so long to see a psychiatrist in my area, I went to my primary care doctor to receive sleeping medication in the meantime. I needed to sleep because when I would only sleep for a couple hours, the panic attacks were more vicious. Also, I work full-time and attend school full-time (I'm a senior in college).
Finally, I met with the psychiatrist after a referral from my therapist. Don't get me wrong -- my therapist and I tried really hard to use natural remedies to attend to my episodes (melatonin, lavender, long baths before bed, cardio exercise (I like to run.)) I was in the psychiatrist's office for 2 hours and after her evaluation, she told me that my primary diagnosis was PTSD and my secondary diagnosis was general anxiety disorder.
I'm currently on Lexapro during the day and Seroquel-transitioning-to-Abilify for nighttime. My family has supported me tremedously throughout this whole experience but in some ways they have not; they hate the fact that I'm on anti-psychotics and anti-anxiety meds. My mother always gives me a dirty look when I come home from the pharmacy with my medications and asks me why I need them. My sister keeps saying, "it's over, just move on."
The last two weeks, I stopped taking my medications to appease my family. The worst episodes came after the 9 day mark when the night terrors returned. I woke up 10 times throughout the nights unable to catch my breath and not knowing where I am. When I tried to tell my family how the medication is a.) the only reason I can drive to and from work and school, sit in class, and b.) drive without a panic attack and the only thing that lets me sleep at night, they just tell me, "You don't need them, you need to get off the meds."
My end goal throughout my treatment is independence from the medication. My therapist and my psychiatrist know that and they fully support it. In fact, they believe that my perspective is extremely healthy. However, they want to wait until springtime to ween me off the medication. And, after attempting to quit the medication cold-turkey, I'm afraid that this battle between my PTSD and my family is going to escalate.
The panic attacks, although not completely gone, are more manageable with my anti-anxiety medication. I use the Breathe 1-2-3-4 method and the Sensory 1-2-3-4 method usually to ground myself so that way I don't escalate.
Please, I just want some people to talk to about this. I feel like my family perceives my treatment for PTSD as an excuse to use this medication and their thoughts hurt me very much. In fact, the arguments (which usually result in yelling) will sometimes trigger an escalation.
Please help.
Kara
I'm reaching out to this community because, I'm sure as most sufferers know, I'm experiencing a lot of isolation and misunderstanding from my diagnosis. The trauma occurred a week before my twenty-third birthday, so around August 16th. The trauma lasted for about a week. I went to counseling about two weeks after the event because my family had no idea how to deal with me anymore. I was having daily panic attacks (around 2-3 times a day, sometimes while driving), agoraphobia, severe insomnia, night terrors, and I needed moderate to sometimes maximum support to even practice self-care. I was in a really bad place for about the first month.
Because the waiting list was so long to see a psychiatrist in my area, I went to my primary care doctor to receive sleeping medication in the meantime. I needed to sleep because when I would only sleep for a couple hours, the panic attacks were more vicious. Also, I work full-time and attend school full-time (I'm a senior in college).
Finally, I met with the psychiatrist after a referral from my therapist. Don't get me wrong -- my therapist and I tried really hard to use natural remedies to attend to my episodes (melatonin, lavender, long baths before bed, cardio exercise (I like to run.)) I was in the psychiatrist's office for 2 hours and after her evaluation, she told me that my primary diagnosis was PTSD and my secondary diagnosis was general anxiety disorder.
I'm currently on Lexapro during the day and Seroquel-transitioning-to-Abilify for nighttime. My family has supported me tremedously throughout this whole experience but in some ways they have not; they hate the fact that I'm on anti-psychotics and anti-anxiety meds. My mother always gives me a dirty look when I come home from the pharmacy with my medications and asks me why I need them. My sister keeps saying, "it's over, just move on."
The last two weeks, I stopped taking my medications to appease my family. The worst episodes came after the 9 day mark when the night terrors returned. I woke up 10 times throughout the nights unable to catch my breath and not knowing where I am. When I tried to tell my family how the medication is a.) the only reason I can drive to and from work and school, sit in class, and b.) drive without a panic attack and the only thing that lets me sleep at night, they just tell me, "You don't need them, you need to get off the meds."
My end goal throughout my treatment is independence from the medication. My therapist and my psychiatrist know that and they fully support it. In fact, they believe that my perspective is extremely healthy. However, they want to wait until springtime to ween me off the medication. And, after attempting to quit the medication cold-turkey, I'm afraid that this battle between my PTSD and my family is going to escalate.
The panic attacks, although not completely gone, are more manageable with my anti-anxiety medication. I use the Breathe 1-2-3-4 method and the Sensory 1-2-3-4 method usually to ground myself so that way I don't escalate.
Please, I just want some people to talk to about this. I feel like my family perceives my treatment for PTSD as an excuse to use this medication and their thoughts hurt me very much. In fact, the arguments (which usually result in yelling) will sometimes trigger an escalation.
Please help.
Kara
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