Not Sure This Makes Sense- Symptoms Changing

[onmyway76]

My "symptoms" have been different lately. Long story short, after sharing my first memory with my counselor, she let me go, and I've been a bit of a mess since then. After several days of crying, which is very unusual, I just felt really sensitive.

I believe I've been dissociating much more too. Before now, it would only be in therapy when questions were asked that would trigger me. Now, it seems like I missing more spots of time during the day. Nothing incredibly long, but definitely "camping out" mentally for periods of time and I don't really know what's triggering it.

Also, having more flashbacks I guess- but less organized- just feelings or bits of a memory. Up until recently, I remembered a lot of my past actually. Now it feels like some of my memories have been shattered into small pieces.

Most disturbing for me, it seems like I don't remember some of my memories. Its like things are missing. Its almost like the memories are hiding out waiting to ambush.

I feel like I must be getting a bit crazy.

 

[Zef]

It sounds like you have started a phase of heavy therapy work.

I definitely identify with the going crazy part as I am going through some heavy work, too. Sometimes feel I can't trust my own thoughts, that the way I understand reality doesn't apply anymore.

Here is how my t and I work through this. . .

Please make sure to share these symptoms with your t.

New or more intense symptoms are to be expected after some therapy sessions. It is part of the process.

Part of the t's job is to manage or pace your therapy so that the symptoms are not overwhelming. The best way the t can do this is by you reporting the symptoms as accurately as possible (although that can be a tall task.) :)

Ideally, your t should be available for contact outside your normal sessions. Don't be afraid to contact the t if you are struggling.

Hope something here resonates with you.

 

[onmyway76]

Thank you so much for the feedback Zef. I especially appreciate you helping me to understand how to share with the T. I'm actually getting a new one as my old one wasn't helping me manage any symptoms. I'll be seeing the new one tomorrow, so I'll be sure to explain in detail what I've been experiencing.

 

[EloiseLandau]

Totally the same thing here. New and intense or changing symptoms...hard but not unbearable.