Death Obsessive Fear Of Family Members' Death

[Amcam]

Hello, I am extremely fearful of losing my loved ones to the point of obsession. Thoughts of their death pop up constantly and with great detail that it drives me to tears. When I was a child I used to cry many nights, because I was scared my mother might die somehow. When I married my husband and he went into law enforcement, I kept worrying he might be killed by dangerous criminals. I lost a lot of sleep waiting for him to come home. Now, as a new mother I constantly worry about my baby girl. The thoughts are extremely disturbing. Sometimes, when I carry her, I imagine me accidentally dropping her and it makes me feel sick every time. Thoughts of weeping at her grave keep coming up. It disturbs me to no end, that anything bad could happen to something as precious and helpless as a newborn. I cannot accept death, I don't think I could live without them.

 

[Deleted member 41588]

This happens to me too but less severe. My mom will go somewhere and I'll start thinking (Especially if shes been gone long) that she got in a car crash and I'll get scared and sad. I imagine the crash (But not in great detail) and imagine my familys reactions and how all of our lives would be torn apart. I'll begin to feel guilty that I wasn't there with her more. When she gets back its a nice relief to know that shes in fact safe. I think part of it is because a gf of mine passed away and another one almost did. I'm scared to lose someone else and my mom is the most close to me that would be at risk for tragedy since she's in a car most the day. That's the most severe one I get. I don't really know how to deal with it, I didn't even know other people had this.

 

[Riot]

This sounds like OCD. You should probably talk to a professional.

 

[Amcam]

This happens to me too but less severe. My mom will go somewhere and I'll start thinking (Especi...

I worry about them being in car crashes too because they happen all the time. I think I would worry so much about my mom dying, because she is the glue that keeps our family standing. She is strong and was always there for me during the worst parts of mental illness. I feel like this is why you worry too, but please forgive me if I assumed and am wrong. Do you also suffer from anxiety and depression?

 

[Amcam]

This sounds like OCD. You should probably talk to a professional.

I think you may be right. My doctors have kind of hinted at OCD, but never really officially diagnosed it. I am on 50 mg of fluvoxamine right now for this issue, but have just started taking it. I am hoping for less of these thoughts and that the medicine is effective.

 

[Deleted member 41588]

My mom is the glue that holds our family together too. That's a big reason why I imagine my family being so torn apart especially if she died like that. I can clearly see us turning on each other and trying throw blame and hatred at each other about it. In my city cars often go through red lights at a high speed and I'm afraid she will be in the wrong place at the wrong time. My moms a super safe driver with nothing bad on her record. It would be terrible if she got into a crash when she's so innocent cause someone decided to be stupid. I do suffer from anxiety in a of couple areas and used to struggle with depression.