Omg I Have Committed To Going Back To Work

[KP the nut]

It is official, although out of a job at the end May. I am working the last month. I am so terrified at the thought, but I need to prove I can do this (OK or maybe not).

My doctor has agreed, I saw work occupational health this morning and they agree, my manager agrees and HR agree - :eek:.

It is scary because although I went back to work after the accident I really struggled and put myself under so much pressure and eventually PTSD took over and I couldn't continue. I keep thinking, can I do this, what about the commute, can I concentrate...................... So as a good friend here tells me, slow down don't think of it as a whole, break it down, so that is what I will try.

I am returning v slowly, the plan is (and it is not written in concrete and can be changed). Week 1. Work Tues and Thurs mornings. Week 2. Work Mon, Wed and Fri mornings. Week 3. Work Mon, Wed and Fri, but longer days and finally week 4 work Mon, Tues, Thurs and Fri longer/full days. Luckily my colleagues are friends and know what is wrong with me. They are v supportive and are happy for me to introduce aromatherapy oils to the office to help relax:D.

 

[Froggie]

Sounds like a great plan (((KP))), as each week goes by, you will know for sure what you're able to do and what you can support. Gotta go , my grandson just arrived from kindergarden. (HUGS) thinking of you

 

[Iam]

That's awesome KP!!! I'll be praying for you. You can do this. LIke you said, take small pieces of it at a time :)

 

[cherryblossom]

Hey KP - well done. You can do this, and hopefully you'll enjoy it :tup:

 

[Adrienne12]

Congrats!!!

 

[Linda Lee Bogard - King]

That is a major step. Knock 'em dead with personality and brains! Congrats...

 

[BloomInWinter]

((((((Kath))))))))

Just remember...you on your WORST day? Better than MOST on their BEST day!

...and I have no doubt you will bring an empathy and wisdom to the workplace that greatly benefits those around you. As you do, here.

Would LOVE to work with you! :>

 

[livergirl70]

Hi KP,

Well done, I'm glad you have got the support of your colleagues. Taking it in little chunks of time does make it easier, you will probably be physically exhausted when you get home, I used to sleep as soon as I got in when I did mornings and wouldn't wake up until about 6pm lol

 

[KP the nut]

I am starting to stress about going back. This time next week I would have completed my first morning. I know it is only four hours at work but it is terrifying.

 

[livergirl70]

It's only natural to feel apprehensive, it's a big step. I drank loads of water so I had to keep going to the toilet which gave me "time out" to breathe and refocus if I felt anxious. I found that I was going to the loo about every half an hour, which meant 8 trips to the toilet and then time to go home, doesn't sound to bad like that does it lol

 

[Adrienne12]

I was scared to death when I first went back to work. It helped that I visited everyone before I came back just for an hour. I went around saying hi to everyone etc. That way, my first day....I didn't have people coming up to me all day so I didn't feel as overwhelmed. I also confided in two people at work that I have PTSD/Panic Disorder. They are my safe people. If I feel myself getting anxious, I can go sit with them until it passes.

There are days...I escape to the bathroom or stairwell for awhile. But things are better than they were. I am sure you are going to surprise yourself and it will be fantastic! Have faith in yourself. You are much stronger than you know!!! I've read some of your posts so I know what you are capable of. I am rooting for you and so are a lot of other people. And if you start to get nervous....remember that I as well as a lot of other people with PTSD are on their way to work just as scared as you. We are doin it and you can too!!!! I look forward to hearing about your first day back.

 

[KP the nut]

OK. I did it, well the first morning anyway. I was so scared, but I've survived and nothing awful happened.

Although I've been driving, actually commuting was v scarey. Just the knowledge that I was driving the same route and at the same time as my accident - hell it was even a Tuesday made me anxious. I had to use all my techniques just to do the drive.

The office bit was fine. Although a big building our office has only 11 people in it and of those only 5 were in today and 4 of those are good friends. So hugs all round :D. I then sat and deleted almost 700 emails, which took most of the time.

I have just woken from a nap as I was exhausted. Back again on Thursday which will be busier. Wish me luck cos I think I'll need it.