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One Thing That Seems To Bring Relief...

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I understand. This shit is so tangled. Pick whichever aspect you can tackle at the moment and stay alive &...
Thank you, Cashew.

I'm still keeping on, barely but still lol. Everyday definitely is a challenge with new ones popping up.

My newest trauma is still fairly "fresh" that I guess I still haven't processed it yet. Not to mention it was very different than my other traumas that it's having a different effect on me.

I've definitely been seeking all the help and resources available to me and now I'm just stuck in the shitty part of waiting for them to get back to me which is hell.
 
One thing I'd look into:

Where can you use thinking in moves? I mean, a lifetime of processing the world...

I can still move (walk, run, still flexible as a rubber band lol).

It's just going from being really athletic and full of energy to having more drastic limitations on what I can and can't do.
Since exercise and sports were my #1 therapy.
 
Would it be possible to store it for later? Come back to it when you're more stabilized, instead of proces...

I really wish I could do that. The thing is I have triggers and flashbacks of it daily since it happened at my own home which wasn't a problem in my previous traumas..
 
I apologize if my post was triggering to anyone. I will be sure to stay mindful of that from now on.
Just so you know, you were fine, and did not cross over a line.

It's not so much an issue of triggering another member, by talking about something uncomfortable; the issue is that if a member posts suicidal intent, the other members who come across that message will assume responsibility for keeping the suicidal person alive. We aren't crisis workers, and the site is not a crisis-line. Posts that hint at intent are generally reported pretty quickly, evaluated by staff, and then handled accordingly.

I've definitely been seeking all the help and resources available to me and now I'm just stuck in the shitty part of waiting for them to get back to me which is hell.
Yep. I used to think the hardest part was reaching out - until I learned that the hardest part was actually co-ordinating my own care. Just keep taking it one step at a time - and keep posting here, it really does help.
 
That is SO AWESOME about playing all the sports (even the "boy" sports) - I did, too!! Distance running, Track, Softball (Favorite) Roller Hockey (in the 'ole 4-wheel skates days), Was the "queen of Tetherball" in Elementary school (sorry, had to throw that one in), and then on into dancing, then to percussion.

About the volunteering thing we spoke of above, it totally brought me out of my major depression while I was volunteering at the County Animal Services where I live! There are so many areas you can work in. If you're allergic, you can do the adopt-a-pets on weekends where you are outside (like in front of a Petco or other store) and help set up the temporary cages and cover them with sheets to help the cats feel safe (or dogs). There are tons of other volunteer things to do - I joined the Special Olympics Hug part of the volunteers - to give hugs to the kids when they reach the finish line, no matter if they come in first middle or last place! These things are real up-lifters and also would take my mind off of my own traumas for awhile! REALLY helped a ton!

Hoping you are doing okay; I haven't, again, been here in awhile! Was going through stuff here at the Apt. Complex w/the Apt. Manager as many have, but she's given her resignation now. I actually taped to my door a pic of Snoopy and Charlie Brown relaxing and it says: "The less you respond to rude, critical, argumentative people; the more peaceful your life will become." I read this every single time I walked out the door it was that bad and repeated it to myself over and over silently, but out loud every time I went to get mail or do laundry (right in front of Apt. Mgr's apartment and didn't look up. It helped a million!!

Hugs to you!! <3
 
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