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People Practice - Only Increasing Anxiety

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I so understand you! For me, at first meeting, I am fine and can get through a social situation. I find it harder with increased interactions with people. I decide I don't like them, but I think it's a defense mechanism. If I don't invest in someone... I don't get hurt. If I don't like them first, it won't hurt when they decide they don't like me.Yet, I crave relationships. :unsure:
man this stuff makes it really hard to start relationships doesn't it?! I'm just sick of it in my own life, makes for a very lonely existence..sigh.
 
makes for a very lonely existence..sigh.
Thing is, I don't feel lonely. At all. On the contrary. When there are other people around, I feel crowded in. Sometimes I even wish my husband would go on a vacation on his own for a while so I have our place all to myself.
 
Thats how I used to feel! until I had it all to myself all the time! (we separated last year)
I like it most of the time (especially the part where HEs not here) but sometimes its too much alone time, isolate myself.
 
I like most people. I spent 8 years in 12 Step groups (only groups around), had sponsors, and really opened up to them. The only people in the groups I don't like are the ones who will do nothing to change their thinking. I don't think they even hear what's worked for other people. The trouble is, after I've let someone see the real me they drop me like a hot potato. I ask them what I did wrong - what needs to be addressed, and they refuse to talk about it. I talk to my T about it, and he says they have issues about getting close. He says I did nothing wrong, but it keeps happening. I haven't gone to group now for 3 months. I just don't trust anybody to know me. I keep checking my alerts for the moderators to tell me to stay off this formum.
 
I have a question for those in a relationship... Even though you aren't alone do you or do you not feel lonely sometimes? for me this is something I wrestle with even having my ESD with me at home.

After reading this thread I am realizing that I may be looking at what I am thinking is my stress bringing my anxiety up when in actuality it's my anxiety raising my stress? I work in a large retail company and I notice that while I do quite a bit of engaging with customers and co-workers, I am sure glad to come home at the end of the day. I don't know if this makes sense or not, hopefully this does.
 
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