Sexual abuse, bullying and ritual abuse - reaction from therapist

Sideways

Moderator
They are trauma specialists also, but only specialize in sexual traumas, I not only have sexual traumas, but also bullying traumas, so I am not sure whether they would help me with multiple types of traumas.
Yes, I'm sure they'll handle both. Free clinics can provide a great base to launch from. They're also great for linking in with other specialist services like social workers etc.

Complex trauma, unfortunately, tends to take protracted treatment. Free clinics may be able to provide you with ongoing support, particularly crisis support. So they're very helpful in that regard. But they often have their limitations for chronic conditions. See how it plays out. If they can't provide comprehensive enough care, they should be able to help direct you to somewhere that can.

Your GP is also worth speaking to. They've probably already done a plan for you to get psychologist support. If that's not cutting it, you may want to talk to them about a (trauma-focused) psychiatrist referral.
 

Polyfractal

Learning
Yes, I'm sure they'll handle both. Free clinics can provide a great base to launch from. They're also great for linking in with other specialist services like social workers etc.

Complex trauma, unfortunately, tends to take protracted treatment. Free clinics may be able to provide you with ongoing support, particularly crisis support. So they're very helpful in that regard. But they often have their limitations for chronic conditions. See how it plays out. If they can't provide comprehensive enough care, they should be able to help direct you to somewhere that can.

Your GP is also worth speaking to. They've probably already done a plan for you to get psychologist support. If that's not cutting it, you may want to talk to them about a (trauma-focused) psychiatrist referral.
I went to a public mental health service clinic for 2 years, I was served with a public psychiatrist, medical doctor and a case manager, they told me that they will discharge me soon. I am afraid if I go to free services such as Spectrum or ECASA, they might only deal with my trauma for a limited time. What I like about private is that it can be long term, longer than 2 years. I have been trying to find a psychiatrist who can do psychotherapy, but it is difficult, as most of them are fully booked.
 

Sideways

Moderator
What I like about private is that it can be long term, longer than 2 years. I have been trying to find a psychiatrist who can do psychotherapy, but it is difficult, as most of them are fully booked.
Absolutely. It won't necessarily take 2 years for you to make a lot of progress, particularly with your function levels. But complex trauma very often takes years of therapy (very often there's years of trauma to deal with).

There's no harm getting yourself onto waiting lists while you continue to look around. You don't need to stop seeing your public health team either. Waiting lists are long all over the country. They can change at short notice, and there's no harm at all just getting your name on the list while you figure things out.
 

EveHarrington

MyPTSD Pro
If a therapist told me they’d need to find someone to guide them, I’d find someone new. Being a Guinea pig, someone they cut their teeth on means your healing will take longer as they won’t know what to do. The title of “clinical psychologist” means nothing if they aren’t trauma informed.
 

whiteraven

MyPTSD Pro
DID is a seperate conversation. That's more a political divide in the industry, and usually only be ascertained by a conversation with the practitioner.
Absolutely agree with this! I've seen a few different psychologistss that work with DID exclusively, and their ideas about what is proper treatment were vastly different. I had to decide for myself what I wanted/believed and find someone that fit that idea.
 

caroline_13

MyPTSD Pro
I have been sexually abused from birth until age 18.
I was raped on a daily basis underground by multiple perpetrators. I have been splitting myself into fragments exponentially, because of the repetitive severe abuse. I had amnesia for 2 decades and then I started to know my DID alters, introducing themselves to me, including their trauma histories.

I have been bullied at school every year for 15 years.
I have been changing school every 1-2 years and the same trauma still occurred to me, I guess I am prone to more abuse, because I have been abused. There were years where I have been bullied by the entire class. I had both physical and psychological abuse. I was so traumatized that I needed to hide in the school's toilet during break times.

I have been ritually abused for 12 years.
I have been through satanic ritual abuse, mind control and programming. It is related to the church, religion and Christianity. I had gone through secondary traumas as well, witnessing unending horrors in the underground, there were murders, deaths and cannibalism. I often have life-threatening death threats from the abusers.

Q: I told my trauma history to my clinical psychologist and I felt I didn't received the compassion/ sympathy/ empathy that it deserves from her, what should I do? For example, she could have said "what you have been through is tough" or "I am sorry that you have gone through so much".
I, for one, need sympathy from my therapists when I drop a bomb. Sounds like this may not be a good fit. I'd go with your gut.
 

joeylittle

Administrator
Q: I told my trauma history to my clinical psychologist and I felt I didn't received the compassion/ sympathy/ empathy that it deserves from her, what should I do? For example, she could have said "what you have been through is tough" or "I am sorry that you have gone through so much".
I continue to sometimes struggle with the level of empathy my therapist offers me. But one thing it's given me the space to notice: if I could have empathy for myself, I don't think I'd be looking to get it from my therapist.

It took me awhile to figure that out. Now, I understand there are benefits from his particular styles of expression, the way he practices holding space for me to talk about the things that have happened to me.

That doesn't mean I still don't sometimes wish he'd offer comfort in certain specific ways...but every therapist handles this sort of thing differently.

Ultimately, if you are invested in doing the work you want to do with this particular practitioner, it'll be worth it for you to discuss all this with them as openly as you possibly can. It will relieve any internal pressure you may be building up as the therapy progresses.

You might also consider goal-setting with her. While it's not always possible to put an actual clock on how fast we heal, it's always possible to set up structure and goals, and then amend them as you proceed.

I had amnesia for 2 decades
This ^^ is complex all by itself. The scope of abuse you describe is also quite intense and broad. I'm not surprised she wants direct supervision on your case, and think that it's not an indicator of her not being up for the challenge - it indicates that she understands how to work with supervision as a tool to augment her own work. Nothing wrong with it, IMO.
 

Bamboo

Learning
Q: I told my trauma history to my clinical psychologist and I felt I didn't received the compassion/ sympathy/ empathy that it deserves from her, what should I do? For example, she could have said "what you have been through is tough" or "I am sorry that you have gone through so much".
About a year ago, shortly after I first mentioned to my T "the thing" that happened to me (still calling it "the thing" because I still struggle with the real word), I was in the middle of a breakdown during a session. My recent admission of the thing and what it was had opened up such panic, anxiety and overwhelming emotion in me that I continuously struggled spitting out complete sentences whenever we tried to discuss it.

I was in the midst of one of those whole "denial/it was my fault/I should have did something" episodes when he very quietly said, "Bamboo......You were just a child"
That's it. Just those words. Quietly but directly. And he used my name...... which made it feel as if it was a personal comment to ME, not just a blanket therapist comment. I don't know if that makes sense or not but it's how I took it in

He's never been anything but kind, honest with very real with me. But in that moment, there was just such true compassion in his voice that it hit me like few things ever have in my life. And while I don't believe that I reacted to it outwardly or visibly, I heard him and FELT the compassion ....... and it moved something in me.

I must had already come to trust him to a great extent or "the thing" would have never surfaced to begin with. Oddly, I do not do well with receiving outright direct validation at all. It just makes me self conscious and anxious. And yet.... that one statement that he made while I was in the middle of a wretched emotional place, was said with such empathy and compassion that it will forever stand out to me. And I honestly believe it is what cemented my ability to continue thru this awful thing from my past with him and do the hard work that is required to deal with it.

I guess my point is that I very much understand how even if you don't expect, or even want constant sympathy from a T, even a small message or statement of true empathy at the right time can move you to a totally different place of comfort/trust and forward on the path toward healing. And healing is what I wish for you.
 
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