Songs You Relate To

[LaurenRose]

Tom Waits
I Don't Wanna Grow Up

When I'm lyin' in my bed at night
I don't wanna grow up
Nothin' ever seems to turn out right
I don't wanna grow up
How do you move in a world of fog
That's always changing things
Makes me wish that I could be a dog
When I see the price that you pay
I don't wanna grow up
I don't ever wanna be that way
I don't wanna grow up

Seems like folks turn into things
That they'd never want
The only thing to live for
Is today
I'm gonna put a hole in my TV set
I don't wanna grow up
Open up the medicine chest
And I don't wanna grow up
I don't wanna have to shout it out
I don't want my hair to fall out
I don't wanna be filled with doubt
I don't wanna be a good boy scout
I don't wanna have to learn to count
I don't wanna have the biggest amount
I don't wanna grow up

Well when I see my parents fight
I don't wanna grow up
They all go out and drinking all night
And I don't wanna grow up
I'd rather stay here in my room
Nothin' out there but sad and gloom
I don't wanna live in a big old Tomb
On Grand Street

When I see the 5 o'clock news
I don't wanna grow up
Comb their hair and shine their shoes
I don't wanna grow up
Stay around in my old hometown
I don't wanna put no money down
I don't wanna get me a big old loan
Work them fingers to the bone
I don't wanna float a broom
Fall in and get married then boom
How the hell did I get here so soon
I don't wanna grow up

(I relate this song to my PTSD. I don't want to "grow up" and become what this world considers a grown up. I don't want to have to conform to the social norms of this world, to pretend and fool myself that I fit into their mould. It is exhausting trying to become the grown up I understood as a child and then the grown up I understood in my adulthood as I watched everyone happily going about their life when I wasn't able to fit into what/where/how/why/when they do things, how they think)

 

[sea]

My Boy Builds Coffins - Florence And The Machine

My boy builds coffins with hammers and nails, he doesn't build ships, he has no use for sails. He doesn't make tables, dresses or chairs, he can't carve a whistle, cause he just doesn't care. My boy builds coffins for the rich and the poor, kings and queens have all knocked on his door. Beggars and liars, gypsies and thieves they all come to him cause he's so eager to please. My boy builds coffins he makes them all day, but it's not just for work and it isn't for play. He's made one for himself, one for me too. One of these days he'll make one for you. For you! For you! For you! My boy builds coffins for better or worse, some say its a blessing, some say its a curse, he fits them together in sunshine or rain. Each one is unique, no two are the same. My boy builds coffins and I think it's a shame, that when each ones been made he can't see it again. He crafts every one with love and with care, then it's thrown in the ground and it just isn't fair. My boy builds coffins he makes them all day but it's not just for work and it isn't for play. He's made one for himself, one for me too, one of these days he'll make one for you. For you! For you! For you!

 

[Nicolette730]

Some of these are hard to read especially if you have been through childhood trama/ domestic abuse so read on with caution.

Here are my top 5

Concrete Angel - Martina McBride


The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask,
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask;
Bearing the burdon of a secret storm,
Sometimes she wishes she was never born;

Through the wind and the rain,
She stands hard as a stone in a world that she can't rise above;
But her dreams give her wings and she flies to a place where she's loved.

Christina Aguilera - I'm Ok

Once upon a time there was a girl
In her early years she had to learn
How to grow up living in a war that she called home
Never know just where to turn for shelter from the storm
Hurt me to see the pain across my mother's face
Everytime my father's fist would put her in her place
Hearing all the yelling I would cry up in my room
Hoping it would be over soon

Rebecca Lynn Howard- Forgive

Forgive, well that's a mighty big word
For such a small man
And I'm not sure I can
'Cause I don't even know now who I am
It's too soon for me to say forgive

Eve-Love is blind
hey, yo I don't even know you and I hate you
see all I know is that my girlfriend used to date you
how would you feel if she held you down and raped you
tried and tried but she never could escape you
she was in love and I'd ask her how? I mean why?
What kind of love from a ni**a would black your eye?
What kind of love from a ni**a every night make you cry?
What kind of love from a ni**a make you wish he would die?
I mean shit he bought you things and gave you diamond rings
but them things wasn't worth none of the pain that he brings
And you stayed, what made you fall for him
that nigga had the power to make you crawl for him
I thought you was a doctor be on call for him
smacked you down cause he said you was to tall for him, huh?
that wasn't love baby girl you was dreamin'
I could have killed you when you said your seed was growin' from his semen
(Repeat twice)
Love is blind, and it will take over your mind
What you think is love, is truly not
You need to elevate and find

Destiney's Child --Girl

See What You All Don't Know About Him
Is I Can't Let Him Go Because He Needs Me
It Ain't Really Him It's Stress From His Job
And I Ain't Making It Easy
I Know You See Him Bugging On Me Sometimes
But I Know Deep Inside He Don't Mean It
It Gets Hard Sometimes
But I Need My Man
I Don't Think You all Understand
I'm Telling You

Sorry I think I might have broke the rules a little

 

[Bosco2153]

Annie Lennox - Universal Child

How many mountains must you face before you learn to climb.
I'm gonna give you what it takes, my universal child.
I'm gonna try to find a way to keep you safe from harm.
I'm gonna be a special place, a shelter from the storm.
And I can see you, you're everywhere, your portrait fills the sky.
I'm gonna wrap my arms around you, my universal child.
And when I look into your eyes, so innocent and pure.
I see the shadow of the things that you've had to endure.
I see the tracks of every tear that ran down your face.
I see the hurt, I see the pain, I see the human race.
I can feel you, you're everywhere, shining like the sun.
And I wished to god that kids like you could be like everyone.
How many tumbles must it take before you learn to fly.
I'm going to help you spread your wings, my universal child.
I can feel you everywhere shining like the sun.
And I wished to god that kids like you could be like everyone.
And I wished to god that kids like you could be like everyone.

 

[hazen]

Depeche Mode
Halo

You wear guilt
Like shackles on your feet
Like a halo in reverse
I can feel
The discomfort in your seat
And in your head its worse

There's a pain
a famine in your heart
an aching to be free
can't you see
all love's luxuries
are here for you and me

and when our worlds they fall apart
when the walls come tumbling in
though we may deserve it
it will be worth it

 

[Kintsugi]

This song is incredible to me for many reasons. Firstly, its emphasis on living life to its fullest is inspirational to me, and it was what I listened to the first time I decided I wanted to live and liked being alive.

Second, its syllabic values create the Fibonacci sequence and swings back and forth in the Fibonacci sequence. (1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13)

Tool
Lateralus

"Black
Then
White are
All I see
In my infancy
Red and yellow then came to be
Reaching out to me
Lets me see

As below so above and beyond I imagine
Drawn beyond the lines of reason
Push the envelope
Watch it bend

Over thinking, over analyzing
Separates my body from my mind
Withering my intuition, missing opportunities and I must
Feed my will to feel this moment
Going way outside the lines...

There
Is
So much
More and
Beckons me
To look through to these
Infinite possibilities...

Feed my will to feel this moment
Urging me to cross the line
Reaching out to embrace the rhythm
Reaching out to embrace whatever may come

Embrace my desire to
Embrace my desire to feel the rhythm
To feel connected
Enough to step aside and
Weep like a widow
To feel inspired
To fathom the power
To witness the beauty
To bathe in the fountain
To swing on the spiral
Swing on the spiral of our divinity
Still we are human"

I'll stop there, give your eyes a rest. Post the rest some other time. :P

 

[Kintsugi]

Another thread made me think of this.

The Dresden Dolls
Dirty Business

She's the kind of girl who gets her slings and arrows from the dumpster
The kind who tells you she's bipolar just to make you trust her
She's the kinda girl who leaves out condoms on the bedroom dresser
Just to make you jealous of the men she f*cked before you met her

*angry piano noises*

 

[Kintsugi]

Wow. Blast from the past. Just jumped into my mind. From when I was maybe 12? 13?

VNV Nation
Chrome

A million faces a million lies
In each and all a chrome disguise
Prompts for action, a forced reaction
Embody promise in a sheen so pure
Hurt, the measure of blind ambition
A testament to your singular disease
Against all wisdom, you heed no warning
Your desires giving you away

If I could change your mind
I wouldn't save you from the path you wander
In desperation dreams, any soul can set you free
And I still here you scream
In every breath, in every single moment
Burning innocence, the fire to set you free

 

[Kintsugi]

Dar Williams
When I Was A Boy

When I was a boy
I scared the pants off of my mom
Climbed what I could climb above

And I don't know how I survived
I guess I knew the tricks that all the boys knew
And you can walk me home
But I was a boy too...

And now I'm in the clothing store
And the signs say less is more
More that's tight means more to see
More for them, not more for me
That won't help me climb a tree in ten seconds flat...

And like the woods where I would creep
It's a secret that I can keep
'Cept when I'm tired, 'cept when I'm being caught off guard...

And so I tell the man I'm with
About the other life I've lived
And I see now you're top gun
I have lost and you have won
And he says, "Oh, no, no, can't you see?"

When I was a girl,
My mom and I we always talked
And I picked flowers everywhere that I walked

And I could always cry
Now even when I'm alone,
I seldom do
And I have lost some kindness
But I was a girl too
And you were just like me
And I was just like you

 

[Venator]

TOOL - Forty-Six & 2

My shadow's
shedding skin and
I've been picking
Scabs again.
I'm down
Digging through
My old muscles
Looking for a clue.

I've been crawling on my belly
Clearing out what could've been.
I've been wallowing in my own confused
And insecure delusions
For a piece to cross me over
Or a word to guide me in.
I wanna feel the changes coming down.
I wanna know what I've been hiding in

My shadow.
Change is coming through my shadow.
My shadow's shedding skin
I've been picking
My scabs again.

I've been crawling on my belly
Clearing out what could've been.
I've been wallowing in my own chaotic
And insecure delusions.

I wanna feel the change consume me,
Feel the outside turning in.
I wanna feel the metamorphosis and
Cleansing I've endured within

My shadow
Change is coming.
Now is my time.
Listen to my muscle memory.
Contemplate what I've been clinging to.
Forty-six and two ahead of me.

I choose to live and to
Grow, take and give and to
Move, learn and love and to
Cry, kill and die and to
Be paranoid and to
Lie, hate and fear and to
Do what it takes to move through.

I choose to live and to
Lie, kill and give and to
Die, learn and love and to
Do what it takes to step through.

See my shadow changing,
Stretching up and over me.
Soften this old armor.
Hoping I can clear the way
By stepping through my shadow,
Coming out the other side.
Step into the shadow.
Forty six and two are just ahead of me.

 

[Venator]

I had to post all of the lyrics to Forty Six & 2 Sorry. They all mean something to me.

Garbage - The Trick is to Keep Breathing [V2.0]

"Can't bear to face the truth
So sick he cannot move
And when it hurts he takes it out on you

And lately I'm not the only one
I say never trust anyone

~The trick is to keep breathing~"

 

[Kintsugi]

Top APC song that I relate to. By far. God. I forgot about this.

A Perfect Circle
Sleeping Beauty

Delusional
I believed I could cure it all
For you, dear, coax or trick or drive or
Drag the demons from you
Make it right for you
Sleeping Beauty, truly thought I could heal you

Far beyond a visible sign of your awakening
Failing miserably to rescue
Sleeping
Beauty

Drunk on ego, truly thought I could make it right if I
Kissed you one more time to help you face the nightmare
But you're far too poisoned for me
Such a fool to think that I could wake you from your slumber
That I could actually heal you

Far beyond a visible (Sleeping)
Sign of your awakening
Failing miserably to (Beauty)
Find a way to comfort you
Far beyond a visible (Poisoned and)
Sign of your awakening
Hiding from some poisoned memory (hopeless)

Poisoned and
Hopeless
Sleeping
Beauty