Sunshineturtle
Bronze Member
So, this is my intro.. I never thought that I would be a board with all of you fine people. Seriously. That is not me being condescending. I just wish that this was not a struggle of mine, as I am sure everyone can relate to.
I never knew that I had this issue for , wait for it... 44 years. I had gone through therapy for my divorce. I had been doing "just fine" sort of. Then, one fine day, my son disclosed that he had been molested. Things started to happen. I could not stand to be touched. I was agitated. Long story short, I had disassociate most of my childhood and many adult years. I had not only survived being molested, beginning at age 3, but, so much more that I don't really need to get into at this time. No one else knows except professionals for the most part. No one else would be very me anyway. This I know to be true. Don't ask why..
Anyway, I now work in a "helping " profession, wonder why I chose that, and try and help those children and families. I train on domestic violence. I am trained on human trafficking and work with those victims.
For the first time in years however, I had an episode of lost time and complete disassociation. This was scary and I can't help but wonder why. Only time can tell. This is me. Oh and the turtle... they are special to me because they are resilient creatures, tenacious, protected, mothers have their own routine for their babies and what they do every time;albeit they do leave them to fend for themselves, slow, but steady... and finally, they may not be the prettiest of creatures, but, they have good defenses and they make a home no matter where they are because they have their own foundation with them always, as it is their hard shell. I did not get mine from my mom, but along the way, people helped me build a good, solid, she'll, to keep the inside soft, a little rough, but soft none the less.
This is sunshineturtle.
I never knew that I had this issue for , wait for it... 44 years. I had gone through therapy for my divorce. I had been doing "just fine" sort of. Then, one fine day, my son disclosed that he had been molested. Things started to happen. I could not stand to be touched. I was agitated. Long story short, I had disassociate most of my childhood and many adult years. I had not only survived being molested, beginning at age 3, but, so much more that I don't really need to get into at this time. No one else knows except professionals for the most part. No one else would be very me anyway. This I know to be true. Don't ask why..
Anyway, I now work in a "helping " profession, wonder why I chose that, and try and help those children and families. I train on domestic violence. I am trained on human trafficking and work with those victims.
For the first time in years however, I had an episode of lost time and complete disassociation. This was scary and I can't help but wonder why. Only time can tell. This is me. Oh and the turtle... they are special to me because they are resilient creatures, tenacious, protected, mothers have their own routine for their babies and what they do every time;albeit they do leave them to fend for themselves, slow, but steady... and finally, they may not be the prettiest of creatures, but, they have good defenses and they make a home no matter where they are because they have their own foundation with them always, as it is their hard shell. I did not get mine from my mom, but along the way, people helped me build a good, solid, she'll, to keep the inside soft, a little rough, but soft none the less.
This is sunshineturtle.
