Supporter Supporting a Partner with PTSD: Balancing Care and Self-Care

[t_2023]

I have C-PTSD my boyfriend who will be retiring from the army soon has PTSD. When things are good they are AWESOME but when they’re bad I don’t hear from him for weeks. This past no contact a month. I was in a 15 year marriage. Emotional and physical abuse. So while I’m trying to be here for him, support him. My triggers are going off constantly. I do NOT want to become trauma bonded again. Nor do I want him too. How would I go about supporting him and not loosing sight of me?

 

[Riley Jones]

I have C-PTSD my boyfriend who will be retiring from the army soon has PTSD. When things are good they are AWESOME but when they’re bad I don’t hear from him for weeks. This past no contact a month. I was in a 15 year marriage. Emotional and physical abuse. So while I’m trying to be here for him, support him. My triggers are going off constantly. I do NOT want to become trauma bonded again. Nor do I want him too. How would I go about supporting him and not loosing sight of me?

I'm sorry to hear that both you and your boyfriend are dealing with PTSD. It's crucial to prioritize your own well-being while supporting someone with PTSD. Here are some suggestions for supporting your boyfriend without losing sight of yourself:

1. Set boundaries: Communicate your needs and establish healthy boundaries with your boyfriend. Let him know what you can and cannot handle, and be clear about what is acceptable behavior in the relationship.

2. Seek professional help: Encourage your boyfriend to seek professional help for his PTSD. A qualified therapist can provide effective strategies and coping mechanisms for managing symptoms. It might also be helpful for you to explore therapy as well, as it can provide you with guidance and support.

3. Educate yourself: Learn as much as you can about PTSD and its effects on both individuals and relationships. This knowledge can help you better understand your boyfriend's experiences and identify healthier ways to support him.

4. Practice self-care: Take care of your own physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and support your own healing process. Practice self-compassion and allow yourself space and time to take care of yourself.

5. Connect with others: Reach out to others who may be going through similar experiences. Online support groups, forums, or local PTSD support groups can provide a sense of community and understanding. The myptsd.com forum I mentioned in my previous message is a platform where you can connect with others who have PTSD or CPTSD and share experiences.

Remember that every individual's journey is different, and it's important to listen to your own intuition and seek professional guidance when needed. Take care of yourself, and I hope you and your boyfriend find the support you need.

 

[LuckiLee]

Welcome. You made it through the honeymoon stage it's bound to get bumpy. I couldn't give any better advice than Riley ^^^^ gave.

Communication and boundaries.

 

[t_2023]

I'm sorry to hear that both you and your boyfriend are dealing with PTSD. It's crucial to prioritize your own well-being while supporting someone with PTSD. Here are some suggestions for supporting your boyfriend without losing sight of yourself:

1. Set boundaries: Communicate your needs and establish healthy boundaries with your boyfriend. Let him know what you can and cannot handle, and be clear about what is acceptable behavior in the relationship.

2. Seek professional help: Encourage your boyfriend to seek professional help for his PTSD. A qualified therapist can provide effective strategies and coping mechanisms for managing symptoms. It might also be helpful for you to explore therapy as well, as it can provide you with guidance and support.

3. Educate yourself: Learn as much as you can about PTSD and its effects on both individuals and relationships. This knowledge can help you better understand your boyfriend's experiences and identify healthier ways to support him.

4. Practice self-care: Take care of your own physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and support your own healing process. Practice self-compassion and allow yourself space and time to take care of yourself.

5. Connect with others: Reach out to others who may be going through similar experiences. Online support groups, forums, or local PTSD support groups can provide a sense of community and understanding. The myptsd.com forum I mentioned in my previous message is a platform where you can connect with others who have PTSD or CPTSD and share experiences.

Remember that every individual's journey is different, and it's important to listen to your own intuition and seek professional guidance when needed. Take care of yourself, and I hope you and your boyfriend find the support you need.

I'm sorry to hear that both you and your boyfriend are dealing with PTSD. It's crucial to prioritize your own well-being while supporting someone with PTSD. Here are some suggestions for supporting your boyfriend without losing sight of yourself:

1. Set boundaries: Communicate your needs and establish healthy boundaries with your boyfriend. Let him know what you can and cannot handle, and be clear about what is acceptable behavior in the relationship.

2. Seek professional help: Encourage your boyfriend to seek professional help for his PTSD. A qualified therapist can provide effective strategies and coping mechanisms for managing symptoms. It might also be helpful for you to explore therapy as well, as it can provide you with guidance and support.

3. Educate yourself: Learn as much as you can about PTSD and its effects on both individuals and relationships. This knowledge can help you better understand your boyfriend's experiences and identify healthier ways to support him.

4. Practice self-care: Take care of your own physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and support your own healing process. Practice self-compassion and allow yourself space and time to take care of yourself.

5. Connect with others: Reach out to others who may be going through similar experiences. Online support groups, forums, or local PTSD support groups can provide a sense of community and understanding. The myptsd.com forum I mentioned in my previous message is a platform where you can connect with others who have PTSD or CPTSD and share experiences.

Remember that every individual's journey is different, and it's important to listen to your own intuition and seek professional guidance when needed. Take care of yourself, and I hope you and your boyfriend find the support you need.

We are both in therapy. As for “other support “ I’m finding tons of information on this.

 

[Friday]

Aloha!

My BEST relationships? Have all been with people who share my brand of crazy.

My single worst relationship, was with someone I MISTOOK my brand of crazy for theirs, & I married. Bad decisions and trauma. Shrug. Trauma creates a helluva lotta different problems in people’s lives. I was expecting one thing, so that’s what I saw. My own fault.

Welcome to the community.

 

[t_2023]

Welcome. You made it through the honeymoon stage it's bound to get bumpy. I couldn't give any better advice than Riley ^^^^ gave.

Communication and boundaries.

Aloha!

My BEST relationships? Have all been with people who share my brand of crazy.


My single worst relationship, was with someone I MISTOOK my brand of crazy for theirs, & I married. Bad decisions and trauma. Shrug. Trauma creates a helluva lotta different problems in people’s lives. I was expecting one thing, so that’s what I saw. My own fault.

Welcome to the community.

It was the somewhat the same as my ex husband and myself. For 15 years. Since I’ve left (3 years ago) he was already in a relationship with the “girl” (using that loosely) he cheated on me with for the last remaining 3 years, while deployed.
He got what he wanted. All I got was trauma. My boyfriend is a good man, I know in my heart/gut he means well. My head… Oh my head play’s terrible games. I’m working on that. He has his own doubts as well. We’re a work in progress

And thank ya