Hello I’m Dan, I had counselling 18months ago for my childhood trauma which I thought helped, understanding triggers and thought I was getting somewhere but now I’m here feeling a mess, destroying people around me knowing I need help, had some advice for edmr and wondered if this really works.
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Sufferer Understanding cptsd and thinking about Edmr
- Post starter Dan85
- Start date
Dark.Green.Feathers
Diamond Member
I’ve had a few lots of not-very-useful or not-in-depth-enough therapy for a load of childhood trauma. with a good therapist now and we’re slowly preparing for EMDR, and use aspects of it in therapy often. it’s pretty powerful stuff. as always with any therapy it helps to be patient and be in a stable-ish place in your life, as realistically as possible. not necessarily mentally but circumstantially. also can be trial and error to find a T who works for you and has the necessary experience/skillset but it is worth the search.
was very skeptical of EMDR at first but since using resources of it in therapy i’ve eventually come round and have opened up to doing the whole deal when she (and i) think i’m ready for it.
also i say be in an alright place in your life (i could only handle a lot of what we do after moving out a 2nd time and having stable space of my own) because trauma therapy is difficult stuff. it will feel exhausting and worse/more symptomatic before it gets better and that’ll be for each individual thing you’re dealing with. you do develop the skills to bounce back quicker and look after yourself better in light of that though. like unpacking when moving house, opening up boxes and having this stuff out takes a while to get it tidy and in the right (or manageable) places, especially if you haven’t built the necessary furniture yet.
it’s worth it but it’s not a walk in the park by any means. but yeah back to main topic ^^ a lot of people have had success with EMDR where other modalities haven’t quite helped, seen a lot of it on here and that’s partly what encouraged me to be curious about it after my T offered it for the future and said about her training.
was very skeptical of EMDR at first but since using resources of it in therapy i’ve eventually come round and have opened up to doing the whole deal when she (and i) think i’m ready for it.
also i say be in an alright place in your life (i could only handle a lot of what we do after moving out a 2nd time and having stable space of my own) because trauma therapy is difficult stuff. it will feel exhausting and worse/more symptomatic before it gets better and that’ll be for each individual thing you’re dealing with. you do develop the skills to bounce back quicker and look after yourself better in light of that though. like unpacking when moving house, opening up boxes and having this stuff out takes a while to get it tidy and in the right (or manageable) places, especially if you haven’t built the necessary furniture yet.
it’s worth it but it’s not a walk in the park by any means. but yeah back to main topic ^^ a lot of people have had success with EMDR where other modalities haven’t quite helped, seen a lot of it on here and that’s partly what encouraged me to be curious about it after my T offered it for the future and said about her training.
parrotthepolly
Diamond Member
Ive heard people can get retraumatized through EDMR and cause more distress, even if you don't realise in the moment the destructive behaviour can show up days, weeks or months after treatment. Do you have any coping skills and anyone you can rely on? It gets unbelievably worse when there are no support systems or at least some form of comfort.
- Post starter
- #4
This is exactly what my concern is and worry it could cause me more destruction, not many coping skills as I’m new to understanding as I’ve blocked it out of my memory for 27+plus years until recent. I’m understanding all my previous years actions mostly through drink. Hence why I’m reaching out
Dark.Green.Feathers
Diamond Member
i think it would be good to reach out to a trauma therapist to try and develop those skills again, it doesn’t have to be emdr at all. i’ve spent over a year with my T doing that, and achieving some processing (without emdr) alongside it. it really makes a difference even though I’ve still got years of therapy ahead of me.
EMDR is definitely destabilising before the benefits, and trauma processing in general is not for the faint of heart. you feel stuff fresh that hasn’t been allowed to be felt before, whatever method you’re using. see it through new and hard lenses. not to scare you but healing from trauma is at times excruciating. it is hard.
to me it’s like healing bones that have set wrong, sometimes they have to be re-broken to align them properly and alleviate the problems the poor heal brings. it hurts, a lot. the payoff is gradually shedding the baggage. and gaining the skills and also relationship with yourself to let yourself be looked after and give yourself what you need. so now i’m not sinking so deep when we get into more hard stuff, and start opening those boxes and the effects that has on how i am.
if you haven't got that skillset yet you probably shouldn't do EMDR yet. processing trauma inherently unleashes those old wounds for a time and emdr is just a very efficient way of doing that (in the right hands). you don’t have to go for something that intense to start getting through your trauma
arfie
Diamond Member
hello dan. welcome to the forum. sorry for what brings you here, but glad you are here.
finding the courage to heal has gifted me with a boatload of coping skills by the time the healing is done.
but that is me and every case is unique. steadying support while you find what works for you.
welcome aboard.
the bulk of my own psychotherapy predates the formalization of both PTSD and EMDR, so i don't have any direct experience with emdr, but i am achingly familiar with this style of amnesia and the pain of recovery. a VA nurse practitioner who was one of my most trusted therapists compared it to a broken bone which was left to heal badly. effective healing requires that the doctor rebreak the bone in order to set it in proper alignment. pain guaranteed, possibly more so than the original trauma.
finding the courage to heal has gifted me with a boatload of coping skills by the time the healing is done.
but that is me and every case is unique. steadying support while you find what works for you.
welcome aboard.
Sues
Gold Member
I've done EMDR for 3 years and even before I began the actual processing of EMDR, my therapist worked extensively with me to develop coping skills, the "safe place" and the container that we used before, during, and after the EMDR. You shouldn't start EMDR until those skills are in place, and your therapist will work on those with you as part of the preparation and process.
EMDR is intense. It brings up all the crap memories. I feel it for a day or two afterward, not so much that I can't function. But it works for me. Everyone is different, and the experience and quality of the EMDR therapist you use matters.
- Moderator
- #8
Sideways
VIP Member
Welcome to the forum:)
The first stage of most trauma therapy typically starts with stabilisation and getting symptoms under control. In my mind, it was the single most important part of my recovery, because the focus is on getting my life back where I want to be based on the problems I’m experiencing now. It’s also very often the longest stage of recovery.
The next stage of treatment is usually processing the trauma itself. It’s very typical of ptsd treatment that, once a person starts on that part of the work, they need to return to stabilisation periods intermittently. Because the trauma processing work is inherently destabilising.
If you need to spend more time on stabilisation and getting your symptoms under control right now? That’s totally okay. It’s normal. And it’s a good idea to communicate that to your treatment team:)
The first stage of most trauma therapy typically starts with stabilisation and getting symptoms under control. In my mind, it was the single most important part of my recovery, because the focus is on getting my life back where I want to be based on the problems I’m experiencing now. It’s also very often the longest stage of recovery.
The next stage of treatment is usually processing the trauma itself. It’s very typical of ptsd treatment that, once a person starts on that part of the work, they need to return to stabilisation periods intermittently. Because the trauma processing work is inherently destabilising.
If you need to spend more time on stabilisation and getting your symptoms under control right now? That’s totally okay. It’s normal. And it’s a good idea to communicate that to your treatment team:)
Susan Jane
Diamond Member
Welcome ! my only experience with EMDR was over 30 years ago. It freaked me out. However 30 years ago I didn’t understand my PTSD. I would try it again, in a stable phase. Glad you found the forum !
- Post starter
- #10
Thank you all for your kind comments and advice, here’s me being naive thinking a few emdr sessions will sort me out, sounds far from it, in day to day life I feel in control but I’m always dragged to wanting something or wanting more, I’ve always played sports from childhood followed by drink and once pushed to a point of to much then another person comes out where destruction can happen…. From my counselling 18months ago I was finding ways and spotting the triggers etc and felt in control, but obviously started to slip without realising. So here I am back to the start again.
parrotthepolly
Diamond Member
Is this your own thought or are you pressured by society to want more?
- Post starter
- #12
Mostly my own thought but the village/society I been brought up in and lived majority of my life pulls me in.
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