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What Do Sufferers Want To Hear From Their Supporters?

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My husband did this same thing one time when I cried uncontrollably, sobbing loudly for a long time. He just held my hand, said nothing and waited until I was ready to tell him why I was so upset. When I did finally say, he just listened quietly and nodded. It was the best thing he could have done! I'll never forget that day. It was the day that it had finally occurred to me that my life had been ruined by all my ailments. I started applying for Disability soon after that. The most important thing was that he did NOT try to tell me that my life had not been ruined. He understood. He didn't tell me he agreed either. He just listened and then let me know he'd heard. That was ALL I needed.
 
no one is the same as they once were and no one will be exactly the same in the future. I am still me...

I LOVE this thought, it is so true! I have all my memories and experiences that make me up into the person I am now, and that is no reason to say to me that I "have changed..." because I still have the same feelings and will react in the same ways I picked up from my parents and sister, my grandparents and aunts and uncles, etc. I learned all these ways when I was young.

Yes, we can change bad habits with help, but that help may take a long time to get us into better shape. In the meantime, we have to deal with ourselves as much as you have to deal with us! And accepting who and what we are may be harder for us than it is for you!
 
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