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Working jobs you hate and motivation for change?

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Not taking it better at all... I'm a complete mess today. I will likely spend most of the day in bed avoiding everything, so that tomorrow I can wake up ready to try again. Comes and goes in waves, you know? But I'm still here and still trying which still should count for something, right?

Don't worry I've done that. Yes waves. Yes you are still trying and it's okay to not be perfect. God will get you there.
 
Don't worry I've done that. Yes waves. Yes you are still trying and it's okay to not be perfect. God will get you there.

Okay this might be right up your alley: editing and proofreading! Here's a link: 104 Places to Find Work-from-Home Proofreading Jobs. Now some of these people want master's degrees or PhDs but my guess is that it's not all of them. Your grammar will need to be up to snuff but from reading your posts I don't think your grammar is bad. There are online grammar tools to help you as well.
 
job, I know what I would do. Exact side business which I know would work, but would take time. But doing these whatever jobs that I hate is making me feel low and cracks my confidence and I end up resenting what I do and then at the end of the day having no motivation to look for a different job or build a business at all. But I need to do such jobs from time to time to pay bills in between the better jobs. But it makes it harder to believe I can earn more and do more. I don't know how to explain it.

I’m the kind of person who tends to define themselves by the kind of work I do.

It’s extremely rare that I can simply see a job as a means to an end (unless I’m travelling; crew this ship, work in that cafe, tech this theatre, build that house, courier these documents, edit this script, work that ranch... it’s all opportunistic picking up work in the overall backdrop of “I’m travelling”. <<< Travelling is my identity, work is incidental). My sister is able to do it very very well, so I sometimes borrow her walking stick on that one (she literally sings :singing:Money money mooooooney! Mo-NEY! :singing:).

The rest of the time? No lie, I do what I tell my kids to do when they’re bored... pretend they’re a spy. :sneaky:

<cough> With slightly less pink panther style sneaking about, and rushing around singing the mission impossible theme song.

What it does is provide that same sort of distance that travelling does; my job isn’t my identity, it’s what I’m doing in my “free” time that is my identity. Which is not actually being a spy :p

I’ve got a limited amount of time I can maintain that fiction, generally about 6 months or so, before shoot me now, this job is utterly useless worthless waste of time // *I* am utterly useless, worthless... starts bleeding into my self confidence & sense of self. But 6 months or so is usually more than enough time to build up enough money from the jobby-job to be moving on towards things that I actually wish to be devoting my life to. Not always. But usually.
 
Okay this might be right up your alley: editing and proofreading! Here's a link: 104 Places to Find Work-from-Home Proofreading Jobs. Now some of these people want master's degrees or PhDs but my guess is that it's not all of them. Your grammar will need to be up to snuff but from reading your posts I don't think your grammar is bad. There are online grammar tools to help you as well.
Might be! Thank you:). I don't think my grammar is bad for general communication, even work... but for writing and proofreading, which is all about how you write, I am not sure... one way to find out I guess. I still need to make ends meet this and next week first, so I am working one of the really tedious badly paid gigs, to have something. So I have to sit down tonight to decide which hours to allocate for working and which- to applying to new ventures. I am finding myself a bit stronger mentally that the last time I had to look for jobs though. Last time I would get too anxious and just couldn't work the badly paid jobs, because I felt stuck in a corner, which made my PTSD act up and I would feel nauseous and anxious and unable to concentrate. That was a bad month/several weeks, I had to go on loans, because I was too anxious. I am finding myself able to finally do something now, even in a bad situation, maybe not as much as other people, but way better than before! I am still surprised. I hadn't been in that bad practical place since I started my meds so I didn't know I was a bit better at all:).

I’m the kind of person who tends to define themselves by the kind of work I do.
Same, 1000x same! I tend to turn my passions into work and work things I'm passionate about. But I am in a situation right now where I can't do that if I want to eat. At least for a while.

I’ve got a limited amount of time I can maintain that fiction, generally about 6 months or so, before shoot me now, this job is utterly useless worthless waste of time // *I* am utterly useless, worthless... starts bleeding into my self confidence & sense of self. But 6 months or so is usually more than enough time to build up enough money from the jobby-job to be moving on towards things that I actually wish to be devoting my life to. Not always. But usually.
I know that feeling. I used to be able to do that, but not since my PTSD really acted up 2 years ago. I was so bad that the more I needed money, the less I could work. Thanks to a lot of efforts, good friends, and some medication, it seems like I am finally able to work scrappy jobs again, at least to some extend. Which honestly is a survival skill sometimes so I am proud of it. It's good putting a time frame on it, I think it helps get through it if you say 3 months, or 6 months. Thanks! May try to say this to myself. Right now I need to both apply to jobs and also work that kind of whatever job, so, I just need to push through and be flexible. Like a spy:P.
 
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