Worst Panic Attack I've Ever Had

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

Last night when I got home from my trip, I learned that my husband did something I did not agree with in terms of being with our boys for the weekend (nothing extremely horrible, just I don't view it as safe). Anyway, it triggered me because I was angry at him and felt he broke trust because we'd discussed this particular issue before. It apparently triggered the child in me as well.

I experienced the worst panic attack I have ever had. It lasted for more than 2 hours. I felt like my chest was going to explode, I felt like I couldn't breathe. It felt like the world was moving (more than just a dizzy feeling- it's a feeling I can't quite describe). I couldn't move because that made it worse. I threw up all over myself. It was horrible.

I can't believe that I had a calm and fun weekend and was able to accomplish so much and then as soon as I return home (well, a little while after that since no one was home when I got home), I fell that much apart. I hate dealing with this and I completely felt like giving up. And today, I feel tired, but relatively stable.

 

[Senecia]

That sounds awful. I'm sorry you had to endure that.. One of the hardest things during my panic attacks is to remember to breathe. It's funny to me how such a normal thing becomes so difficult at that time, though it makes sense. I hope your husband supported you through it. At least it's over now, and hopefully your panic won't be ever be that bad again.

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

@Senecia , thanks for your support. It is so hard. I've had other attacks but nothing like this before, well for that long. My husband was trying to be supportive but since he was the original trigger it was hard, but he did help and I thanked him for it this morning as I couldn't have done it without him.

 

[Care Bear]

@JEKBreatheandBelieve I am sorry you had to go through that. It sounds very distressing. I am glad your husband was able to help you and that you are feeling better today. Go easy on yourself the next few days.

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

Go easy on yourself the next few days.

I took a nice casual start to this morning. I have been doing things around the house to keep me busy, which is helping for now.

 

[Lionheart]

I just had a nasty panic attack, a few days ago, and I found that grounding techniques and mindfulness, helped me to stay present and focused.

Although it took me a few minutes to realize what was happening to me, once I did, I utilized the coping skills mentioned above, that I learned in CBT (cognitive behavior therapy), and DBT (dialectical behavior therapy). Perhaps those techniques will help you as well.

I know, for me, that struggling against a panic attack only seems to make it worse. However, focusing on the present moment, (and objects around me), helped me to calm and soothe me.

Sorry for what you had to endure, and I hope this post is somehow helpful to you.

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

Thanks, @Lionheart777 . I tried grounding and mindfulness, but I couldn't get focused. I couldn't keep my focus with the world feeling like it was moving or I was. I have been finding a lot of help with grounding techniques with the skills I've learned with CBT and DBT, too.

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

I had another bad panic attack last night though not quite as bad. I tried grounding and distracting, but it didn't work. I actually drove away from my house to a nearby parking lot. I cried and yelled and then fell asleep. I just have so much on my mind that I can't seem to control it any more- it's leaking out everywhere! I am so tired of it, but I am trying to keep hanging in there. I drove home after I woke up in the parking lot- I was a little disoriented and perhaps a little dissociated.

Now my husband wants to come to my therapist's again and work out a crisis plan. That sounds like a smart idea, but whenever he comes it is both helpful and uncomfortable. I feel like a little kid whose done wrong even though neither of them treat me that way. I told my husband that I would talk with my therapist about a crisis plan, share it with him, and then he can let me know if he thinks he needs to talk to her- then maybe I will arrange a phone call or a meeting, depending how I feel.

I feel like such a failure. I stopped working and it seems like I am getting worse. I am waiting to see if I get into a residential treatment program and the wait is driving me crazy. My life is driving me crazy! I guess that's how this roller-coaster of PTSD goes.

 

[Higgins]

I had another bad panic attack last night though not quite as bad. I tried grounding and d...

Hey. So sometimes extended panic attacks are actually undiagnosed asthma. Just putting it out there.

 

[shimmerz]

extended panic attacks are actually undiagnosed asthma.

What are your sources for this?

 

[JEKBreatheandBelieve]

I am pretty sure it was a panic attack. I get asthma-type syptoms after running in cold weather, this was not the same.

 

[Higgins]

What are your sources for this?

There are several, just google it (I can't post links here).

You will find studies like:
"Asthma and Panic in Young Adults
A 20-Year Prospective Community Study"
and
"Asthma and panic attacks." by Perna G1, Bertani A, Politi E, Colombo G, Bellodi L. (NIH).

The symptoms are often very similar. Unless you're in the emergency room / doctor's office at the time of an episode, the doctors only have your description to make a judgment call. So if your doctor thinks you already have panic, they might not look for underlying asthma.

One way to differentiate is to watch (yes sort of morbid) videos on youtube of ER patients experiencing one, then the other. You'll see how they're different and how they're similar.