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Freaking out about upcoming colonoscopy - how to get control of myself?

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I'd insist on general anesthetic?

We were talking about this this morning and it's one of those situations you have to insist and just not worry about what they think.

Get a letter from your primary or your therapist. I've done this for several things.

I read back on this according to what you said it shouldn't be an issue at all getting a general for this it's standard procedure here but your doctor referred you and can get it set up for you I'm sure of it.

Tell them you have to be asleep for it. End of story!

I read your last post if they told you conscious sedation? They told me that once but it means asleep at least in my case.
 
Though it’s not really the impression I got from my consultant or his secretary...that the sedative effect would be that strong. Maybe I need to contact the secretary again and ask about that...
They usually give you propafol which completely knocks you out. It is the best sleep ever. You never even knew they were there. I think the worst part is the prep. The prep is really bad. I usually start a clear liquid diet several days before and skip the prep. Hang in there.
 
if they told you conscious sedation? They told me that once but it means asleep at least in my case.

He just said they’d give me a sedative to relax me a bit...and some pain relief to make it more comfortable. So, I took that to mean very light sedation and still very aware of everything...perhaps I need to call his secretary again and check.

Stronger sedation sounds good to me!
But the process of them actually sedating me (an injection, I guess?) could be very triggering itself.


I think the worst part is the prep. The prep is really bad.

Yeah, I’ve just looked at how much of that liquid I need to get down! Jeez!


Can your partner help advocate for you?

She can to a point, maybe. If we discuss it before hand and I can ask her to say some things if I don’t manage to myself. Presumably she won’t be able to come with me for the injection though...and, tbh, I don’t know that it would help at all anyway.

She is rocking quite a lot of anxiety of her own at the moment too, so I am trying to contain myself so as not to stress her too much...
 
He just said they’d give me a sedative to relax me a bit.
In the NHS it's usually an injection of midazolam (a benzo), I've had similar procedures under it and I remember them but basically didn't care what was happening at the time (and I *hate* medical stuff). Other people have fallen asleep under it. Depends really
But the process of them actually sedating me (an injection, I guess?) could be very triggering itself
Would it help if you couldn't feel it? There's numbing cream and stuff you can ask them to use? I dunno if it'd help cos it depends on why it's triggering but worth a shot?
 
I've had a few of these procedures. And.. I've got another one in the next few weeks.

The preliminary clean out is ...disgusting... but very necessary bc they cannot do a proper examination without it. So just drink it and stay close to your bathroom!

All of the preliminary forms and permissions are completed before theatre.

The actual procedure.. honestly they gave me a sedative, put a cannula in my arm prior to wheeling me down to theatre.

They certainly don't drag their feet... once in theatre. They attached a litre of normal saline, injected sedation into the line and that was that.. till I woke up back in the ward.

I had no after effects, no discomfort and was allowed to start eating/drinking as soon as I liked. I woke quite alert and with no memory of anything after being wheeled to theatre.

I cannot imagine your doctor doing anything less than ^. Ring your doctor and ask. Put this fear to rest. Don't speak to the secretary - ask for your doctor to call you back if necessary.

Some anxiety is normal but given your history is it possible to go to your gp and get something extra for the lead up to this procedure or really give yourself permission to practice strategies to cope with the anxiety. Breathing, yoga, exercise, more appts. with your T. ?

Good luck! When you start to freak out remember it is the only way to make sure you stay well.
 
Thanks for the info @Chris-duck - it’s good to get some reassuring info from a UK/NHS perspective.

Re: the injection, I’m not sure that feeling the needle is the big issue. When I had local anaesthetic to have some dodgy looking moles removed before, it actually really freaked me out knowing they were doing something on my body and I couldn’t feel it. Aside from being squeamish about veins (just the thought of them - ugh!) I think the main thing that I find very anxiety-making about the cannula situation is someone putting something inside me. I know that probably sounds very silly :-(

Last time it happened, just before a surgery, I got triggered as they tried to put the cannula in and the anaesthetist was flapping around, shouting st me to calm down (!) and stay still, then he instructed the nurse to hold me down and that’s what they both did. It was awful. And I know that was just one time and one medical professional...I’m just worried that I don’t want to have that reaction again but don’t know how I would do anything differently to control it.

Thanks for all the info @blackemerald1 - I always really appreciate your calm relaying of detail. Detail is good :-) Because I want to really try to get an accurate idea of what to realistically expect.

put a cannula in my arm

Yeah...I think this could be a thing that I find hard to manage.

@EveHarrington - yes, I’ve taken probiotics for the last few years. For the last 10 years, my IBS has been fairly under control. There’s the odd blip but, in general, it’s been pretty ok. Then suddenly in February this year, it took a turn and hasn’t been good since. My old IBS medication and the probiotics don’t seem to be making any difference. I can’t think of anything that could have triggered it (no food or other lifestyle changes etc) so dr wants to investigate, just to be sure, but not expecting to find anything sinister.
 
Ok, I just wanted to say what helped me. I know we all experience this disorder differently. I know here in the USA, docs usually don’t prescribe things that aren’t a prescription, even though the over the counter stuff can be the solution. Good luck with your procedure.
 
worth doing (even though GP and me are both not expecting anything to show up)
I understand what you’re saying - to shift focus away from the things that are freaking me out and on to the positive reason for having it done.
And I can absolutely try to prep in advance to try to make it a more manageable/less stressful experience (eg asking people for info here, communicating with the consultant’s secretary in advance, taking a Valium on the way there, taking comforting things with me etc.


Good way to come up with a strategy.
 
I did actually ask the consultant if he could 'put me out' for it and he laughed and said no
In the states it’s standard practice to go for full sedation.

It takes less time (and therefore manhours) for partial sedation, so the option is often given -because it speeds things up, and lets them do more patients in a day- so I can see why NHS standard is only partial sedation... but the standard HERE is Zzzzzz Go to sleep in prep, wake up in post Op.

He just said they’d give me a sedative to relax me a bit...and some pain relief to make it more comfortable. So, I took that to mean very light sedation and still very aware of everything...perhaps I need to call his secretary again and check
a good question to ask...

“How do you handle rape victims who get combative and suicidal during these kind of procedures?”

Put the ball in their court.

It gives them the information they need, that you weren’t requesting full sedation because it’s “embarrassing”... but because there are serious issues in play with serious consequences.
 
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