Do you need PTSD to post here?

[Chris-duck]

I don't feel like you do. I am diagnosed but I'm genuinely curious how other members view this. There is some cases where new members, rightly or wrongly, aren't welcomed due to lack of diagnosis. Yet also long term members without diagnosis.

Not to mention how when forums were separated, PTSD was never a requirement. I understand "that rap song can not cause PTSD" but I'm just wondering what people's feelz are about how PTSD seems a bit elitist sometimes.

 

[Skywatcher]

My therapist was talking the other day about how certain things that aren’t ptsd can cause the same symptoms. I think it bothers her that people were minimizing the seriousness of ptsd by calling everything ptsd, but then she said that the feelings and experiences of others that have the same symptoms are incredibly valid and do need help. A good example is my daughter. I was worried that she must have experienced a big trauma that she wasn’t sharing due to her ptsd like symptoms. Turns out, she just has an over sensitive nervous system that was reacting to a bad break up and small T that happened at school. She went to therapy and learned the same calm down stuff and became medicated. She is doing great now! I’m still working on my c-ptsd stuff and it isn’t the same. I don’t think that ptsd is a badge of honor, more of a curse.

I don’t have a problem with non-ptsd people posting. Maybe something that ptsd people have learned can help them with their symptoms, too.

 

[Kintsugi]

Right, so the lack of a diagnosis is problematic, and it’s not, in my experience, because people are being “elitist” but what @Skywatcher expressed: it’s a curse of a Dx.

Whether you have PTSD or not, experiencing a disruption of functioning due to an event calls for the attention of a professional qualified to assess what the hell is up.

If you do have PTSD, you should see a professional for support. I’ve had at least 12 years of therapy in the past 17ish years, and I’m only 30, and ideally, I would still be in therapy now, but at least I have had some Serious Intervention and experience with developing management skills and coping strategies. I still have a P, which is at least something and someone.

Participation on this forum is inherently triggering. People who have not even had a consultation but jump in here for peer support are putting themselves at serious risk of getting into the deep end of symptom hell and possibly drowning. This is a bad outcome for them and the community.

People who do not have PTSD and think they do, particularly with no Crit A trauma, are not going to benefit from being in a community of people who are always talking about living with and managing an incurable illness. Moreover, they really need to consult someone who is qualified to help them navigate whatever disruption they have experienced, because they will likely not improve if they have no idea what is actually the matter causing the disruption.

I have seen plenty of people who don’t have PTSD get sucked into the attitude of relying on the community for constant emotional support without putting in the least bit of work to improve their circumstances. Notably, I’ve seen “supporters” who have not had any contact with a brief flame with PTSD—sometimes for over a year—who are here daily harping on about their misery without any report or evidence of trying to make progress out of that headspace. That is not the purpose of this community for anybody, but it’s especially draining for the community when the person who is taking up a lot of psychic space without seeming to take on any constructive advice or behaviors doesn’t even have PTSD. Like any community that is specific, the people not in that specific category have, like, everywhere else to go for support. That effect is exacerbated if the member identifies as a supporter and sticks to those forums, because I am not at liberty to respond to such posts or people with the same, uh, zest I would with a sufferer carrying on in the same way. And I believe I am known for being rather... zesty.

In short, a lack of diagnosis is a good way to be ineffective in your own journey and as a member of the community at large, and this inability to participate constructively for yourself and others can easily veer from “unproductive” to “toxically destabilizing” for everybody.

 

[Movingforward10]

In short, a lack of diagnosis is a good way to be ineffective in your own journey and as a member of the community at large, and this inability to participate constructively for yourself and others can easily veer from “unproductive” to “toxically destabilizing” for everybody.

That's quite a strong thing to say.


I don't have a diagnosis. I don't see that means I destabilise the forum and am ineffective in my journey!
Why would having a diagnosis or not be the thing that makes someone ineffective in their journey and destabilise the forum?

Anyway: I post on here because it seems the most abapt place for me to fit in to talk about issues.

But. Wow. Maybe I need to not read this thread!

 

[Kintsugi]

I don't have a diagnosis. I don't see that means I destabilise the forum and am ineffective in my journey!

I didn’t say it was an inevitability. Read what you quoted carefully, which is the concluding overview of my rather comprehensive reply, and you might find it less strongly worded than you initially thought.

Why would having a diagnosis or not be the thing that makes someone ineffective in their journey and destabilise the forum?

I think I was pretty thorough in my explanation for why there is a tendency toward those outcomes in everything preceding my last paragraph.

But. Wow. Maybe I need to not read this thread!

Anyone who feels overwhelmed by forum content should remember that they are voluntarily consuming it. Knowing when to step away or participate elsewhere is both necessary and commendable. But if you do read this, I am hoping you will find that my opinion was anything but an attack on those without a diagnosis, especially to any particular member personally. My opinion is informed by a decade of observation and participation and therefore necessarily an amalgam of countless experiences with innumerable and unique members.

 

[Chris-duck]

she said that the feelings and experiences of others that have the same symptoms are incredibly valid and do need help.

I basically agree with this. And this forum wasn't, to the best of my memory of years ago even specifically designed for PTSD (I vaguely remember mysexabuse being an offshoot of here pre um, here)

I don’t think that ptsd is a badge of honor, more of a curse.

because people are being “elitist” but what @Skywatcher expressed: it’s a curse of a Dx

I don't, personally, consider it a badge of honour, but I do see lots of newbies present with critA trauma and being shunned due to lack of diagnosis, when I also see various long term members being accepted, which is why I'm curious if other peoples views differ from my own. Especially when critA trauma currently includes *hearing* anothers trauma.. So um, everyone kinda has critA trauma, cos who doesn't know details of a critA? Not saying it *should* count, just saying, technically, it does.

If you do have PTSD,

Me personally? I can't tell if that's you doubting me, or the plural you, heh. But yeah. I'm definitely diagnosed. Have been for like 16 years, had a bit of a blip, got rediagnosed.

People who do not have PTSD and think they do, particularly with no Crit A trauma, are not going to benefit from being in a community of people who are always talking about living with and managing an incurable illness

Agreed.

Moreover, they really need to consult someone who is qualified to help them navigate whatever disruption they have experienced, because they will likely not improve if they have no idea what is actually the matter causing the disruption.

Also agreed.

In short, a lack of diagnosis is a good way to be ineffective in your own journey and as a member of the community at large, and this inability to participate constructively for yourself and others can easily veer from “unproductive” to “toxically destabilizing” for everybody

Disagree, like, as you clarified, I think this is specific to circumstances and a bunch of other factors.

Why would having a diagnosis or not be the thing that makes someone ineffective in their journey and destabilise the forum?

Anyway: I post on here because it seems the most abapt place for me to fit in to talk about issues.

But. Wow. Maybe I need to not read this thread!

Genuine curiosity, with no requirement to answer, obviously, but is there a reason you haven't pursued diagnosis? I understand theres a million reasons not to, I'm just curious so tell me to f*ck off if you like :) And I have read your diary etc, and see no reason why you shouldn't be here tbh.

 

[Friday]

As far as I know spouses, friends, family, students, researchers, press, therapists, etc. have always been welcome. Anyone interested in learning about PTSD, whether they have it, know someone who has it, suspect they have it, or are just interested in learning more for personal or professional reasons. Hence the Undiagnosed, Supporter, & Other tabs in Intros

There were sister-sites, for several years, where that wasn’t the case. I came from one of them (MyCombatPTSD). Totally different membership rules on the sister sites. Here, again as far as I know, has always been the nexus point for all things PTSD.

The key point, however, is PTSD. That’s what this place is about. That’s the wealth of our shared experience. It’s no more elitist to have a focus, than it is for a forum to be focused on Cancer or Parenting. Whether the focus is narrow (PTSD, Breast Cancer, New Parents) or wide (Mental health, Cancer, Parenting).

Whilst we do get Trolls, (same as parenting forums get people who have pets instead of kids, or one worse, delusional disorders; and cancer forums get hypochondriacs, or attention seekers) the vast majority of undiagnosed people who wander in here are honestly seeking help. I also don’t see it as elitist to try and get people the help they’re asking for.

***

Case in point? The girl who was just (possibly) drugged and sexually assaulted. She totally deserves real life crisis support / sexual assault support. That isn’t what we do here. If she had PTSD before she was assaulted? Then, cha. In addition to real life crisis support, managing the uptick in her PTSD symptoms, triggers/stressors, etc., in addition to real life support for the recent sexual assault, would be right up our collective alley. A helluva lot of us have been sexually assaulted -or experienced other traumas- long after we already had PTSD. And that can create some unique & complicated problems. But? Even if we were so elitist as to assume that PTSD is the be all & end all of all things? Any time she spends with US is valuable time she’s wasting not getting traumatic resilience support, to possibly prevent PTSD from ever manifesting. But setting aside the idea that PTSD is the only result that matters in a traumatic situation... She’s also wasting valuable time -with us, who already have our end results- preventing or treating serious medical conditions (pregnancy, STIs, some lethal even with the preventative viral cocktails given ASAP), dealing with legal situations on a clock, and a whole host of psych conditions that are not PTSD but commonly result from -or are exacerbated by- trauma; anxiety disorders, mood disorders, eating disorders, phobias, etc.

Crisis support for sexual assault deals with the whooooooole range of needs/ issues/ problems resulting from recent sexual assault. Pointing her in that direction? Isn’t elitist, but the opposite. It’s giving her problems the weight & import they deserve; and not taking the idea that just because I/we/anyone have PTSD... no matter what YOU have... WE can help! Um. No. Not really. The vast majority of things needed in the wake of new trauma have f*ck all to do with PTSD. Unless you already had it, to begin with.

 

[Chris-duck]

It’s no more elitist to have a focus,

Oh agreed, it's more how non-PTSD folks are (sometimes) treated, when long term members have had PTSD actually excluded but are treated like they have PTSD due to their long term status, so it seems a bit unusual sometimes.

Oh and re the case you are referencing, I think she was treated well, even while being redirected, she's not the type of person I'm referencing. I think she didn't make a bad call coming here cos we do know resources for her to go to etc. Even if we aren't the "right" place. We know where is.

It just seems inconsistent sometimes, and since some members are diagnosed, some aren't, some are diagnosed with things that aren't PTSD and have had PTSD ruled out, it's just interesting to me.

 

[Kintsugi]

@Friday was better at elucidating my “find out what’s actually happening without peer support being one’s sole support system and help center” feelings and the ticking clock aspects of that reaction from members.

I couldn’t figure out what “before the forums were separated” thing was about, because I joined the general PTSD forum in 2011, which was before the sister sites.

And yes, I started using the informal “you” meaning “one” and was too stubborn to reverse course.

 

[Chris-duck]

I couldn’t figure out what “before the forums were separated” thing was about, because I joined the general PTSD forum in 2011, which was before the sister sites.

I also explained that very badly, my apologies.

And yes, I started using the informal “you” meaning “one” and was too stubborn to reverse course.

Heh, totally valid, I just read it and was like "umm.. if *I* do?" and logical brain was like "shut up chrissy you dumbass, its plural you", so I thought I'd cover all bases just in case I guess.

 

[somerandomguy]

It is both entertaining and infuriating when the people who are sure they got PTSD from listening to a sweary rap song post here, though. Usually explained with many thousands of words.

Everytime someone like that comes in and wants us to read their thousands of words, it takes psychic energy away from assisting and responding to the people here who really do have PTSD but who, in typical PTSD fashion, minimize their traumas to the point they doubt their diagnosis.

 

[Chris-duck]

Everytime someone like that comes in and wants us to read their thousands of words, it takes psychic energy away from assisting and responding to the people here who really do have PTSD but who, in typical PTSD fashion, minimize their traumas to the point they doubt their diagnosis.

Okay, but what about people who *have* experienced trauma, but it resulted in depression/anxiety/personality disorder/whatever?
They're not less entitled cos they don't hit PTSD IMO, and as Friday said, maybe not the correct place to seek support, but I guess considering any other diagnosis a waste of your time is the elitism I was referencing.