Hi guys ... I'm new here ... And there's so much great stuff here but I'm hoping I can get a few thoughts on my situation....
First of all there's so many different areas to post a thread in... My issue at the moment is about employment I suppose so I will post here.
I recently left work because I had such a difficult year with my PTSD...
I only realised last year that I have PTSD and this was because I was triggered at work.
I since got some treatment, but everything just went to shambles basically. It's ruined everything for me at work. It's was a new job too.... And on the first few months I was triggered and I went of sick... And I was still in probation. Long story short I was off sick a second time because work was stressing me and triggering my condition. The management procedures, targets, absence management all was getting on top of me and causing me anxiety. Some targets were also time pressured and this is one of my triggers.
Long story short I left few weeks ago because I just couldn't take it anymore. I got better before I left (probably because I knew I was now going to leave) but the targets and management procedures were always going to cause me stress and because it was causing me to get worse I decided to hand in my notice and leave.
Anyway so I decided once I've left I'll take a break and focus on my health and well being get fit again, eat healthy again and relax before starting a new job.
I've had to unfortunately sign up benefits because I haven't got a new job to go to yet.
The whole benefits system is stressing me out now. (Live in UK) and I've just got to a point we're I'm thinking this is also making me stressed and triggering me. I thought u was stable and okay. But it's all become overwhelming again. And all I want is to rest and take a break but because I have to claim for benefits ... I have to obviously look for a job and show that I'm looking ... But I'm not ready. And now it's like... I've realised I'm not ready and I'm not okay yet. And I have to tell them that. And it's like the cycle starts again. I thought I was okay but I'm not and that triggers all the anxiety and everything all over again.
Will this always happen to me. I get triggered by pressure, and tight deadlines, and when I'm in a position where if I don't complete something or of I don't do something there will be consequences so for example in this situation if I don't meet appointments or work search commitments I could get sanctioned.
I mean these kind of stressors will be everywhere in work in any job and course etc.
I hate feeling like this because I don't want to be ill. I don't want to fail. I don't want to not succeed. I don't want to keep failing. I don't want this condition / disability. I just want to be normal. And be able to do normal things. But honestly I feel so exhausted from the last year and how much stress work has caused me...
Will these cycles always happen... It's almost like if I don't aknowledge it and carry on as normal I can be okay. But this is what I've been doing. And then the other day I got so overwhelmed I just sobbed in the job center uncontrollably.
But if I aknowledge it it spirals.
What are your thoughts on all of this... I know there isn't one key question here but I'm at my teather right now :(
First of all there's so many different areas to post a thread in... My issue at the moment is about employment I suppose so I will post here.
I recently left work because I had such a difficult year with my PTSD...
I only realised last year that I have PTSD and this was because I was triggered at work.
I since got some treatment, but everything just went to shambles basically. It's ruined everything for me at work. It's was a new job too.... And on the first few months I was triggered and I went of sick... And I was still in probation. Long story short I was off sick a second time because work was stressing me and triggering my condition. The management procedures, targets, absence management all was getting on top of me and causing me anxiety. Some targets were also time pressured and this is one of my triggers.
Long story short I left few weeks ago because I just couldn't take it anymore. I got better before I left (probably because I knew I was now going to leave) but the targets and management procedures were always going to cause me stress and because it was causing me to get worse I decided to hand in my notice and leave.
Anyway so I decided once I've left I'll take a break and focus on my health and well being get fit again, eat healthy again and relax before starting a new job.
I've had to unfortunately sign up benefits because I haven't got a new job to go to yet.
The whole benefits system is stressing me out now. (Live in UK) and I've just got to a point we're I'm thinking this is also making me stressed and triggering me. I thought u was stable and okay. But it's all become overwhelming again. And all I want is to rest and take a break but because I have to claim for benefits ... I have to obviously look for a job and show that I'm looking ... But I'm not ready. And now it's like... I've realised I'm not ready and I'm not okay yet. And I have to tell them that. And it's like the cycle starts again. I thought I was okay but I'm not and that triggers all the anxiety and everything all over again.
Will this always happen to me. I get triggered by pressure, and tight deadlines, and when I'm in a position where if I don't complete something or of I don't do something there will be consequences so for example in this situation if I don't meet appointments or work search commitments I could get sanctioned.
I mean these kind of stressors will be everywhere in work in any job and course etc.
I hate feeling like this because I don't want to be ill. I don't want to fail. I don't want to not succeed. I don't want to keep failing. I don't want this condition / disability. I just want to be normal. And be able to do normal things. But honestly I feel so exhausted from the last year and how much stress work has caused me...
Will these cycles always happen... It's almost like if I don't aknowledge it and carry on as normal I can be okay. But this is what I've been doing. And then the other day I got so overwhelmed I just sobbed in the job center uncontrollably.
But if I aknowledge it it spirals.
What are your thoughts on all of this... I know there isn't one key question here but I'm at my teather right now :(