Having Trouble Going To The Store

[DBEST]

This is my first real post, and I guess I am posting this first because it is what I am struggling with the most right now. A simple little task of going to the store to pick up groceries sends me into a panic attack every time. Two of my triggers and men wearing cologne and unfortunately children. I know how do you avoid men or children in your day to day life? I am becoming more and more home bound because of this. Does any one else struggle with going into stores?

Thanks,

 

[Silver.]

When I weaned off klonopin, I went through a very bad period of agoraphobia, something I had never experienced before (though I do have social anxiety). I had my s/o do everything outside of the house for me. That didn't really help get me out of the house, did it?!
I started forcing myself to do little things at a time. First it was checking the mail (mailbox is about 20 feet from door). Then I just practiced driving. I didn't go to stores, I just drove here and there (it's pretty country here). Then I went to a small convenience store, very early (hoping no one would be there, it was just the sales girl). I did the convenience store trip quite a few times until I could work up the nerve to go to the grocery store. I always went early, so it wasn't busy, and worked up from there.
Things are easier now, though I still have my "stay inside days", but the progress I did make had to be done in baby steps or it never would have happened. *sending you strength to at least give it a try* x

 

[Gadgie]

I used to be like that, and get really anxious when I was doing my shopping, I've even been known to leave the trolley, and head for the nearest exit, to be sick outside?

However, things have improved since then, I don't get anywhere near so anxious about being in crowded stores, unless I get trapped in an isle, where both ends are blocked with people?

I've done this by determination and pushing myself forward, of course I'm by no way cured, but at least I'm improving, slowly.

 

[withpanics]

I did that early morning shopping too. When I woke up, I left immediately. Less time to panic and rest of the day is way more chill since thats resolved. Its also practical, less waiting in lines. Still works wonders under stress, prolonging doing something uncomfortable tends to make it worse...

 

[Friday]

Stores? Yes. Although for different triggers & stressors than you, same end result.

Originally I dealt with the problem by either not going into stores, period, or making sure I was drunk &/or high (aka altered).

I originally solved the problem by dealing with my stressors and triggers surrounding going to the store. Exposure therapy is a hugely powerful thing.

I say originally, because I've had this problem twice, now. The first time was 15-20 years ago, the second time is over the past 5 years. How I handle things this time around is a bit different than the first time, since I know what's going on, and how to both deal with it & solve it, it doesn't bother me so much. Both in the I know I'm going to be getting panic & anxiety attacks from doing XYZ and in the I know how to both deal with them, and how to get rid of the stressors and triggers that are causing them. So there's a lot less avoidance than there was the first time, and a lot less pressure. If I have time to deal with the stress? I go, I just also block the time necessary for it. If I don't? Then I deal without the stuff from the store, or I use alternate means (AmazonPrimeNow, for example).

It's the different between can't & don't want to.

 

[DBEST]

Thank you for the replies. I do try to go to the stores in the early morning as there are far less people in there at that time of the morning. I guess I am just going to have to break down and push myself to go back. Everytime I have an attack in there it just makes it that much harder to go back. I wish my therapist could do exposure therapy maybe that is what I need.

 

[EveHarrington]

Baby steps!

I think it's good to push yourself a little bit more each day or every few days if rest is required.

I don't necessarily believe that a therapist is required for conquering this anxiety (but can indeed help if you have access to therapy).

:hug:

 

[withpanics]

You can also pick a day when you really dont need to get groceries and try to browse as long as you can. Buy an ice cream or something very small what you can ditch if you panic. Another great way is to split your groceries and fetch small amounts but more often. Again, less time inside the shop but you still get some items.

I've done both and those really worked. Once I even forgot I was inside a shop :) started to panic a bit when I noticed what I was doing. For some strange reason, if I spend more time inside the shop, going through teller is getting harder by the minute. Thats why I rather "hit and run" with alot of groceries and expose myself with only one soda bottle or other one item buy with cash.

I really recommend shopping lists and if you go to the same store every time, taking the same path turns to a habit and you start to feel more comfortable going through it. Drawing a supportive note to your list wont hurt when you can focus really hard to that paper if you feel anxiety getting stronger.
A little " You can do it! You've done it before :) " can turn your list into a little mentor :)

Happy shopping everyone!

 

[Gamera3000]

I had a period of agoraphobia for awhile a few years ago. I still struggle with it sometimes. To get out of it, I would often only go places where I could take my dog, and/or places where there would be no people. Then I'd chose places where I could just drive through or go in and out quickly. Another reason to bring my dog. Then I would just give myself permission to not do more challenging things, like go to a grad school mixer. Let those a**h***s mix with each other. If you focus on just the small things and work on those you can function a lot better.