Holidays are lonely without family. but...

[Friday]

Still, I'm told family is important...

Food is important. That doesn’t mean that eating rotten food is a good idea. Or that you’re going to like every kind of food out there, no matter how melt your face off spicy -or any other type- it is.

 

[ground crew]

So, you bring up a good point, don't do unhealthy relationships... But I don't really do relationships well. At all. With anything more complex than a german shepard.

So, perhaps trying to amend family relationships could be a growth path? Downside-they haven't grown. So it would be an unhealthy relationship and thus not benificial to ME! So just keep them at a distance. Can do.

I was probably just feeling depressed from the limited sunlight and the vitamin D it makes. I wasn't missing them at all!

 

[ground crew]

I called Mom, gave her my new address, I moved last week. From a homeless shelter that I was in from Halloween to new years eve. I got busy and didnt update her. so, my bad. Anyway, I threw an olive branch and apologized for not keeping them updated. I further owned the failure to communicate and explained (truthfully I think) that I didn't hate anyone and self isolation is a symptom of my condition.

When I saw my daughter before Christmas (she is now a days drive away!) I told her gently that I had PTSD. This was news to her. I told her not to worry too much, I am in Therapy! Cause therapy always works... I don't think i scared her too bad. She's 13, going on 19 I think... But she does have the one available secure attachment point my heart can afford...

Okay, there is a lot in that first paragraph to unpack. It has been a rough decade. Or five.