How To Get A Job With This Condition

[dnp]

I feel crippled by my fears. My self-confidence is completely shot. I'm afraid to interview. I'm afraid that my insomnia will wreak havoc on my job performance. I spend all my time building up my skills. Just getting more and more skills. But I feel like I'm no closer to getting a job. I can control my anxiety with medication but there is no medication to fix my self-confidence. Has anyone else felt this way before?

 

[Whitebird]

I can relate. This is my problem too. I am on medication, but it is not enough. I tried therapy, but It was not helpful for me because I can not talk in therapy. I think I can not do anything, so I can not say anything to help you...:(

 

[darrenS]

If its that bad , may i suggest you look at what skills you have or could acquire and go it alone ...what do you have to lose ? Working for yourself can give you the flexibility to deal with it on your own terms

 

[Neverthesame]

Don't forget that lots of "normal" people do stupid things that make working hard for themselves. How many times have you heard the old story from the guy next to you. "I didn't sleep at all, I was at the bar all night." Or. "Oh man, (video game) released at midnight, I've been playing it all night, why do I do this?"

Don't forget the sheer volume of places that have employees that are just sodding lazy. Yet have worked there for years.

Everyone has bad days. It happens. If your boss wants to fire you for having one bad day. He's an asshole you don't want to be stuck working under anyway.

As for the interview. Yup, nerve wracking. You are definitely not alone in that fear. Most everyone gets nervous about a job interview. Try to remember that all you can do is your best. Deep breath, eye contact, firm handshake and be honest. You will either get the job, or you won't. Not the end of the world.

What I am reading from you, is someone who has skill and a strong work ethic. Two things that are often sorely lacking these days, from people in most every occupation. I don't think you have nearly as much to worry about as you think you do.

 

[digger]

I spend all my time building up my skills. Just getting more and more skills.

Do you mean work related skills, or skills relating to therapy and your anxiety/self confidence issues?

 

[illusionist]

Oh yes!.....I think for us it's perfectly normal. I've got an interview tomorrow..I've kept myself busy covering everything about the job, the company, and realistic thoughts, so as not to work myself up into a frenzy. I am not thinking any further than that, as I know it will build even more stress that I don't need at this moment. Focus on what you really need to focus on...here and now rather than what could be, weeks down the line. Focus hard on your coping skills you have learned.....remember, confidence is something you build up by experiencing and doing things....that's when we really do see our capabilities, observe them well.

 

[dnp]

Thanks so much all for the replies and encouragement.

@darrenS - Working for myself would be wonderful. I think soliciting clients is probably even more stressful than applying to a regular job, but I know I've got to do something. I guess I just have to do it.

@digger - I mean work related skills. But I should probably be focusing on my coping skills more.

 

[Go Hungry]

Hmm... Well, I don't know what sort of job you're interested in, but there are civil services that help people find jobs. You can call the unemployment office and they can point you in the right direction. As for the confidence thing.. Well, that comes with practice, and I had to learn in a trial by fire. I had no way of getting by without a job, so I had to work somewhere, at all times. Eventually I found office jobs to be my thing. I got a lot of experience working hotel jobs..

Ooh! There you go. Third shift at a hotel. There's not much competition for all night jobs and they tend to be quiet. Sure you have to deal with people checking out in the morning, but not for long. There are all types of night time jobs that you can do to build a resume and gain more confidence. I'm not sure how old you are, but you don't have to shoot for the super stressful jobs straight away. Try and ease into something more low-key and then work your way into more demanding stuff as you see fit. :)

 

[Deleted member 1860]

DVR? Have you tried them? They help people get back into the workforce. I'll be soliciting their help later this year.

 

[Neverthesame]

@Go Hungry & @Solara Both make a very good point. Job finding services would likely be very helpful for you.

If it helps, I can tell you that I have held the same job now for a little under 8 years. In that time I have had more than my share of bad days. It has been hard. Yet being able to work, has given me more than just financial freedom. It has taught me, and still teaches me. How to manage myself and the way I need to conduct myself in every day life. This particular job has also forced me to work alongside my trauma, and the people who work in that field.

I personally don't recommend making the occupation which is your sole source of income, into a type of exposure therapy. There is a reason why therapy is done by trained professionals in a controlled setting. Ha ha. Oops.

The feeling that you get when you start a job, and keep a job. Is so very liberating. It can bring you so much hope and personal pride. Knowing that even with the deck stacked against you. Even though it is probably harder for you than everyone you work with. You can do it.

But, take it slow. Use the tools and services there to help you. And when your ready. It'll be worth it.

 

[dnp]

I would love to have a night job. That would be great in a lot of ways. I guess I used to go to the unemployment offices when I was younger and they never seemed to do anything, and that was back when it was easier to find a job compared to today.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Isn't DVR different than unemployment? They don't just help you find a job, they help you get the training and such so that you can get back into the workforce.