I Am So Mad Right Now

[munkinmama]

I just want to scream. I was on the phone taking an important call when my brother and his friend showed up. I did not mind them coming over but I had little warning. Jellybean who is my service dog in training got very excited to see my brother and his friend. She is only 4 months so still working on not jumping on people. My brother's friend came in first and Jellybean was jumping on him before I could correct her I saw from the corner of my eye that he smacked her and said " Stupid Bitch" I was so angry he did this. She is still a puppy who is learning and so am I. I have never trained a dog before. How is hitting her going to correct her anyways violence solves nothing.

This was a huge trigger for me because my ex husband would take our dogs by the collar and kick them in the belly or punch them as his way of correcting them. I had so many flashbacks with that one slap. I could feel myself shutting down and I barely heard anything he was saying. I am going to go lie down now and hopefully calm down

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

You should tell your brother's friend to not hit your dog or perhaps keep her in another room for her safety when he shows up if you don't trust him not too.

 

[munkinmama]

Oh I will have a talk with him when I am more calm and i would have had her in another room if I had known they were coming over. Well lesson learned

 

[FindingMyself88]

I am so sorry about this, you know I dealt with something similar yesterday. I think you are smart in waiting to talk to him. If it was me, I would also tell your brother you need a warning before coming over. Even if she wasn't a service dog in training, no one should hit a dog period, but ESPECIALLY if it's not their dog!

 

[Justmehere]

Hitting a dog only makes dogs more fearful and thus more aggressive! How awful that he did that!

If you can, try to communicate strong boundaries to your brother that if he it any of his friends are going to come over, they must agree to ignore all bad manners by your dog. Period. They must leave correction or training of doggie manners up to you, period, at all times, or just not come over.

This would have upset me so deeply, especially with a pup. So sorry this happened. :hug:s to you and Jellybean. How is Jellybean doing now? How are you doing?

Take deep breaths and try to remember the past isn't happening now. You can protect sweet Jellybean now.

 

[KwanYingirl]

No dog should be hit. That is uncalled for and abusive. Dogs need positive reinforcement especially for a service dog. And it needs to be you training Jellybean. I'd tell my brother to keep that guy out of your house. Forever. Anyone that would lash out at a dog is a danger. Period.[DOUBLEPOST=1404166325,1404166258][/DOUBLEPOST]You know, now that I think about it, maybe Jellybean sensed a danger in that guy and was warning you.

 

[silkleaves]

It makes me sick to my stomach that someone would do that. A guy I was seeing met my bosses dog, who is an *absolute* sweetheart..and when she came over to him just to check him out, he looked at her with disgust and said "get away from me dog." That was like...4 months ago? And I'm still seething over that. If someone were to lay a hand on a pup, oh man...I would lose my mind.

Really am sorry to hear this happened to your pup. Personally, I would be banning the brothers friend from my home...if he can't have respect for my home and the beings who live there, then he would need to park his happy butt outside my door. Anyone who would behave that way would not be welcome.

 

[munkinmama]

ok I am calmer now getting ready for Jellybean's finally puppy class at Petsmart til next month. I am going to have a chat with my brother about his friend. I am not sure if she nipped him playfully, I know she jumped up on him but what i saw was him smacking her. I have zero tolerance for violence. The thing that get me is this friend is a dog owner and I know he would be pissed if anyone hurt his dog. I do not want to have a fearful or aggressive dog. She has a sweet and calm personality for only being 4 months and she is entitled to her puppy moments. I am focused on her obedience training once she has that down pat i will work with her other tasks. It was suggested to me that I let her be a puppy and continue doing what I am doing

 

[FindingMyself88]

I am glad you are calmer now, especially before her class. I know how hard it is trying to train while being upset! Good for you for standing up for your partner and friend pup :).

Even if she wasn't a puppy, she is entitled to be a dog, no one can be perfect all the time! Bristol is 3 months shy from being 2 years, but she still needs breaks and times to just be a dog. Your home should be a safe place for her to do that, as mine should be too. When that is challenged or threatened, it can be triggering for not just your pup, but you too!

Continue being the good doggy mommy you are! :) She knows you love and care for her and the great thing about dogs is that they are so forgiving and focus on the moment :). Oh to learn to be more like them!

 

[SeanCharles]

I really like and understand this thread. Considering that my replacement dog (From Emotional Support Dog to likely a Psychiatric Service Dog) is in the planning and in ways, I am preparing/Equipping myself for the End of Service Cycle (Senior Dog).

I realize that violence towards a dog especially a service dog, whether in training or already trained, can suffer trauma similarly to the way we have. (Trauma does come in various forms.) It saddens me that people are violent towards dogs. I agree though, he had no right given it's not his dog and should have left the correcting up to you. At least too, in the dogs mind, she knows to be watchful of this individual in the future.

Sean/Geordie

 

[Laura 2]

Really am sorry to hear this happened to your pup. Personally, I would be banning the brothers friend from my home...if he can't have respect for my home and the beings who live there, then he would need to park his happy butt outside my door. Anyone who would behave that way would not be welcome.

Have to say this would be my tack. I'm gutted to read what happened. I'd be very freaked out too. I wouldn't have such a violent moron in my house again - I just cannot deal with the disruptive energy they give out, even when they're sitting still. I hope your pup soon forgets this and doesn't become scared or angry towards males of similar age and type.

 

[SeanCharles]

I hope your pup soon forgets this and doesn't become scared or angry towards males of similar age and type.

That is a good point too in relation to what I said above. With the pup's age, it may be too soon to really know how this incident may or may not have an effect on the dogs personality.

Sean/Geordie