I Just Want To Scream! Anger?

[keifer]

I don't understand. I don't have a trigger and I just want to scream. Maybe I'm angry. Maybe I'm in pain. I feel I have it buried so deep I can't feel it.

And now I know why I want to drink. So I don't have to deal with these feelings. It feels like haunting pain, like a ghost lurking in the darkness. Why can't it just stop? I want to just run away.

 

[crazy8]

Bummer. I hate those days, sorry you're feeling that way. Can you go out and run? Scream into a pillow? do pushups? Write? Get it out somehow?

 

[keifer]

I didn't expect this. I thought I was getting better.

I screamed. I'm working out a bit, pushups, now stretching. I want to take a long walk. I want the pain to just end. I can't sleep. I silently wish I had my 12gauge here to tempt me.

Also listening to Celtic music which I do enjoy. I paused to write. I guess I was right in this is a living hell. I don't have it bad as others and it must be truely hell for them.

Thanks for listening.

 

[crazy8]

Sigh. I've been in that dark place too. It's true that it feels like a living hell. Glad you're working out. Enjoy that Celtic music. Is there some new Celtic music you can discover? More things to write about? Keep at it.

 

[Seasounds]

Yep , isn't it the way of PTSD; sometimes deep pain bubbles up when you'd rather be getting on with daily things in you life. I know that place, all too often.
Even the haunted feeling is familiar.

 

[Britt.f7]

As my younger son told me when I was holding everything in, Just breathe, just breathe. It is okay to feel those emotions. Even the ones that rot. Scream into a pillow, do a wild dance. Maybe close your shades for that one. Find humor. Those are the things I try to do. Well, maybe not the wild dance. I'll keep that in mind for the next time. Celtic music is wonderful. Keeping ourselves preoccupied. with positive things and away from the things that could hurt us more. I know I sometimes have to keep myself in what I call a safe space. That's what I mean about staying in a positive area or positive things.

Please take care of yourself. I'm rooting for you.

 

[aka]

I know exactly how you feel keifer. I have been the same way the past two days. I want so bad to scream at the top of my lungs in hopes of releasing this ball of frustration and pain that is trapped within me. It makes me so miserable when I can't find a release for these emotions but I am pretty use to doing just that.