I Realize That I

[Ghostybear73]

I realize that you can have a good day and be okay. :D

 

[Karen12]

After crunching the numbers I realize that I cannot pay for a storage unit here while saving to get my things out of storage back home and bring them here. That means this crazy-making cluttered tiny house is going to stay this way indefinitely.

 

[Lionheart]

I realize that we are actually very fragile as human beings and that life is fleeting, short and precious. I also realize that as survivors of trauma, we are some of the strongest, most tenacious, compassionate, and understanding people in the world today!!!

 

[Tinyflame]

I realize that 3 events in particular embedded within Christmas-time cause me to feel (previously unidentifiably) upset, sad, & unsettled- the diagnosis of the immediate (like 'yesterday'- "10 years earlier" according to the Dr's) death of my mom, and her illness, a situation at Christmas of an attempted rape (which seems 'weird' to say), & a situation that resulted in a death I blamed myself for. (None were the original trauma). I guess that explains a lot of why the time of year is 'loaded'/ feels very 'weird'.

Also, cold is a trigger for me. I always get cold triggered, but for the first time I've realized it is a trigger. And I remember the happenings/ cold of my face/ body/ fingers during during them. Well actually I had a (physical) flashback, I haven't had one for years. So weird to me how perfectly clear they are & everything remembered during them, but hard for me to recall the same full details after the fact.

 

[Tinyflame]

I realize from @Lionheart777 's post I feel like a huge softie with cracked edges.

 

[Tinyflame]

Dear @Lionheart777 , gentle :hug: 's for you btw. I've missed you.

Does anyone know, how or why can a person have a flashback of a trauma different than the original (precipitating) trauma? (I've had at least 2 or 3 in my lifetime- ie. ones that weren't of the original event(s) but other traumas ). :confused:

 

[Lionheart]

Dear @Lionheart777 , ".....btw. I've missed you."

@Junebug

I have missed you as well. I hope to catch up with you soon and please know that you can message me anytime you wish to.

Peace and comfort for you,
Lion

 

[Anrish]

I realize that I am working things out even if I can't name them.

I realize that I'm more lonely than before, but at least I'm honest to myself.

 

[Let It Be]

I realize that I'm going through a lot right now. It is like I'm facing a new normal as things constantly change for me and I let go of things.

New neighbor next door for the first time, contact with former boss and trying to find peace in that as well as waiting to have therapy on my shoulder. I realize that I need to take things very slowly right now as I deal with them.

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

I realize that I'm having a hard day today. Someone who is friends with one of my ex's who emotionally abused me for years reached out to me last night. We haven't spoken in 6 years.

I realize that's why I didn't sleep good last night.

I realize I'm really anxious and hypervigilant today.

I realize I have a lot of confusion about a lot of things today.

I realize that I'm having a hard time staying grounded today.

I realize that I feel overwhelmed.

I realize that I keep isolating today.

 

[Tinyflame]

I realize that it causes me a lot of fear & panic in knowing that my body/ self has good days & bad days, not in the way people generally mean when they say that (that there is too much to do & too little time to fit it in), rather more in the way people say it when ill, that some days I am capable & some days not. I realize that is understandable to others when people are ill, but not recognizable when it's just this (ptsd). I realize I don't know when I'll have a good day/ bad day so I do too much on the good days. And I fear I won't have a 'good day' (be capable) when it's required. I can't trust my body/ self to come through. And that effects my nerves, & also makes me fearful to commit to things, or events. And it makes me sad.

I realize it's a relief to figure that out. :)

 

[Recovery4Me]

@Junebug :tup: I realize your post is awesome!!

Congrats on this inspiring progress within your journey!:hug::woot::hug: