Sexual Assault Molested today

[Lulu95]

Hello everyone,

I posted a few months back and was discussing my fear of going in public places ever since I was sexually assaulted by my boyfriend years ago. I always feel like every man is following me around and am super paranoid. Today, I was in the supermarket and I noticed that a man was following me. I thought I was just being paranoid but then five minutes later he came up behind me and put his hand up my skirt and grabbed me inappropriately...

I feel disgusted by the situation and I keep blaming myself even though I know it wasn’t my fault. I just keep thinking if only I hadn’t worn this dress today. But then I’m also like, why do people think they have the right to assault me? Is “sexually abuse me” tattooed on my forehead?? I’m just very upset and needed to share what happened. Because my last abuser stalked me I am afraid that this guy might too. I drove around for a while to make sure he couldn’t follow me and I think I’m safe but I’m afraid to drive home.

I just need some support from others who have experienced this. Thank you

 

[EveHarrington]

I’m so sorry this happened to you. :hug:

 

[Deleted member 47384]

That's horrible! I'm so sorry that happened to you, it's such an awful feeling.

You did nothing to deserve that. It doesn't matter what you wore or what you were doing, your body belongs to you, and this man is absolute scum. Absolutely no one has any right to put their hands on you without your permission, for absolutely any reason.

We live in an unfortunate culture where this kind of street harassment is rampant - I used to endure the same thing for YEARS when I relied on public transportation. I feel like things are beginning to change, more and more people are standing up against this type of behavior, but right now it's a really steep uphill battle.

I'm so, so sorry. Try to be gentle with yourself today, maybe do something nice for yourself. Even something simple like getting your favorite sweet or taking an extra-long shower, or whatever your favorite self-care activity is. You definitely deserve it :hug:

 

[Sweetleaf]

Ugh. f*cking. Dammit f*cking people.

You're not the only one who has had shit like that happen. I've never been upskirted like that, but I've been pantsed in public, I've had my ass grabbed and my breasts grabbed. Bars, house parties with a lot of people - I don't know what to say to you right now other than you don't have "assault me" written on your forehead, it's not your fault, and you didn't deserve that - also, you're not alone.

That all happened before my trauma, but it was still hard on me when shit like that happened - I can only imagine what you must be going through right now, and how horrible that must have been - I haven't had anything like that happen yet since my trauma ended. The worst was some extremely f*cking creepy flirting in a liquor store, and I didn't have the spine to even say anything. I guess that does avoid conflict, but I wish I could just stand the f*ck up for myself.

It is awful, to have shit like that happen. It's hard because you don't know what to do. I personally feel like next time it happens, I'm either gonna freak the f*ck out and run away, freeze, or get violent as hell, or who knows what, it's a total mystery - and I'm scared as f*ck of all of those responses, because regardless I will probably have zero control over it, and be firmly depersonalized. My heart is racing even thinking about it right now, I'm so sorry that happened to you. Ugh holy f*ck.

 

[Lulu95]

Thank you all so much for your support. I needed to hear that. I will do something nice for myself today, I appreciate your time and suggestions. <3 I'm so sorry to hear that this has happened to you, too. :(

 

[somerandomguy]

@Lulu95, that is horrible and that guy is straight-up garbage. This is not in any way your fault. Everyone should be free to walk around wherever, whenever, and however and not be molested!

 

[ILoveLife]

I'm sorry this happened to you :hug:

 

[Scarlet13]

Hi
Pls try to recognize that these events arent connected nor about you.
It is easy to feel like there is an "abuse me" tatoo on you, but really this is just random shit.
Im sorry this happened especially because you were already fearing it.
Think of all the times you were in the grocery store and how peaceful and uneventful these times were.

 

[Rumors]

I'm sorry this happened. I hope you reported him. Hang in there.

 

[blackemerald1]

@Lulu95 - you are not responsible for the actions of another person.

Did you report it to the Police? Is there surveillance in the store that the owners of the store can provide to the Police?