Partner can't cope with my ptsd

[EMDR is magical]

Has anyone successfully got through PTSD with a partner?

I was diagnosed with PTSD around 2.5 years into my relationship (9 months after I first sought treatment), and (thanks to our healthcare system) I didn't receive treatment for another 1.5 years. During all of that time, it took a huge toll on my relationship with dissociation, and physical symptoms too. It was awful for us both. Then I started to get better, slowly but surely and within 9 months I completed my EMDR and was back on track ...

After all this time had passed, my husband was a shell of a man. I was so worried about him, he was withdrawn, teary, losing weight and not seeking help (despite my encouragement). Fast forward nine months and he has confessed he doesn't think he can carry on with our marriage. Life with me has still been challenging (I went back to university once I was better and so money has been tighter so we can't go out as much). He is losing hope that we will ever be happy together.

Of course I cannot promise him anything for the future. I can only promise that I will be earning good money from this summer when I start my new job, and that I have conquered most of my demons. I can promise to keep trying and to be patient.

I cannot promise anything else.

So I'm a bit stuck for how to move forward.

Interested to hear from others facing/who have faced similar issues.

 

[Deadman]

I notice that nowhere in your post do you say you love your husband. You talk about making more money and feeling better about yourself. Could that be why he is losing hope?

 

[Jan]

He needs therapy. I would make that a must have. If someone isn't mentally healthy he can't be in a healthy relationship.

2nd what is he missing? You are talking about making more money but I don't think that will fullfil his needs. Be it sex, cuddling or the ability to openly talk to his partner about a problem without being worried that he will hurt her just by saying it. What of your limitations are most annoying for him instead of for you. They should get higher priority.
And is there anything that has to stop.

He should formulate his needs because they are necessary for a healthy life. Then you both have to estimate how long you will need to meet his needs without stumbling back into the dark. And if that is longer than he can take a breakup has to be a valid option, even if both of you love each other. Ultimately only you two can decide but I still advocate: the most important thing is for him to get therapy asap!

 

[Niki10009]

Has anyone successfully got through PTSD with a partner?

I was diagnosed with PTSD around 2.5 years into my r...

Hi. I'm really sorry that despite all the hard work you are putting in, it doesn't seem to be enough from his perspective. I don't have any good advice, but you are not alone. Just know that its amazing you're carrying on with a better job and so considerate for wanting to do your part to make more money and take care of him as you get better. I found out in late Feb. that I had PTSD. My husband told me the next week he didn't want to be with me anymore.