Respect Chat Or Lose It Individually, Part 2

[Ocean5]

Can we still do supportive hugs? If obvious we are not here to meet someone for romance.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@Ocean5 if i couldnt give higs, man if be out the door quick cuz i hug a lot here lol.

:hug: there see! ;)

 

[UnKnown-Self]

@Anarchy
I'm didn't take what you posted negatively. I don't even know why I posted about it to be honest it was at least 20 years ago and nothing to do with this forum or it's chat room. It was one of those things that just sort of free flowed. I didn't even remember it until I started writing. That happens to me sometimes and I'm like where the hell did that come from? I've learned to just leave the posts once I've already posted it instead of deleting them. Joeylittle helped me do that by pointing out I must have posted something for a reason, even if I don't understand it at the time.

I hope no one was offended.

There is a connection between that memory and something totally unrelated that I am working through right now I guess, which has nothing to do with this forum either.

My system makes some odd connections sometimes and when it does I go into the auto writing place of "what the f*ck?"

Most times I catch it, copy it, paste it in WORD and save it in a folder I have for things to be looked at later because I usually don't know why I wrote it.

Sometimes, as you see, I don't catch it and people get a glimpse into my Wonderland.

And that folks is one of the reasons I stay out of live chat.


,

 

[Kintsugi]

However, none of us has access to another person's mind and motives. absolutely none of us. So that statement is your interpretation.

Actually, calling someone "a manipulator" is saying that the person uses manipulative behaviors and does not cast aspersions on state of mind, just behaviors, for which you do not need to access someone's mind or motives.

However there are other possible interpretations; a lot of us have big dissociative partitions in our heads. A change of place or a change of people can mean that we do not have access to memories associated with other places or the company of other people.

Some of us also have big problems with object constancy - If we're not looking at something or someone - it's difficult to believe that it exists.

For someone who asserts that one person does not know what is in another's head, you sure do like to shrink hypothetical people's heads. Such speculation on the potential problems members could have is just as insane as assuming people run red lights or cut you off because they're rushing to a dying person's bedside or are in labor; it's just hypothesizing, and it doesn't alter the objective and objectionable behaviors being witnessed.

For someone with those problems (and I'm not saying that the person you dealt with did have those sort of problems - I really have no way of knowing either way), the de friending could well feel like yet another abandonment.

Who cares? Unacceptable behavior is unacceptable?

Very few of the people who come to this forum have the interpersonal skills necessary to be able to deliberately manipulate someone else. and the idea of unconscious manipulation - just does not make sense - it's a performative contradiction, it is self refuting.

Bullshit! Oh, my god. Bullshit.

Sure, I struggle not to be judgemental with some people who post here, and we are all welcome to take a liking or disliking to anyone, But please be careful about imputing other people's motives - because they are absolutely not available to us.

@Alice.in.Wonderland stated generalizations that there are people out there who don't always have the best of intentions.

And also, imputing behaviors to mental health is as pointless as imputing motives. It is irrelevant. And it's takes just as many crystal balls and tea leaves.

Pot. Kettle. Black.

 

[Deleted member 33052]

I'm not sure about the lack of respect in the chat rooms. I've always felt everyone has been respect...

Hope, I've never seen you give a bad bit of advice, in fact, I love hearing what you have to day. Just be yourself, speak your truths, and we will all be better off for that. :hug:

 

[UnKnown-Self]

What I find so very interesting is this thread took the turn it did AFTER someone took the time to say "in the chat room" what is all this all about with the respect it or lose it thread and THEN posted a link to the thread "in the chat room"

Oddly enough I just happened to be passing by and saw it because I was looking to see the featured thread. LMAO because I f*cking avoid chat and here I am pissed over the shit I saw with one five second glance.


But if that is not deliberate shit stirring someone please tell me what is?

Especially since they had to come to the thread after posting the link in the chat room and stir the shit pot some more with immature grade school comments.

 

[anthony]

asking chat instead of seeking professional help for what could be a serious medicine side effect. The person was advised to go to the ER and refused. I immediately started talking to other people in chat

That's all you can do. People are from diverse locations globally, and ER may not simply be an option for some, others may have bad experiences with them, the list of possibilities goes on. All you can do, is what you did... not judge and choose what is right for you, to ignore them further and chat with others. That is within you control, well done.

There is a lot of collective knowledge here at any given time, and many people can answer even medication questions. Much of the information is online nowadays for ease of reference and directing people, hoping they read for themselves which may help them seek medical treatment. You only control you... and that is all you have to worry about online upon any social network site.

 

[anthony]

Especially since they had to come to the thread after posting the link in the chat room and stir the shit pot some more with immature grade school comments.

I wouldn't worry myself with such things, to be honest. Just focus on you, dismiss any noise around you.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Very few of the people who come to this forum have the interpersonal skills necessary to be able to deliberately manipulate someone else. and the idea of unconscious manipulation - just does not make sense - it's a performative contradiction, it is self refuting.

Bullshit! Oh, my god. Bullshit.

Thank you thank you thank you @Simply Simon ! Ive been wanting to call bullshit on that for a while and didnt have the balls.

I agreed with the fact the most people with BPD dont know how to manipulate on purpose...or at least I cant on purpose if i tried and I havent a clue how to try or why id want to.

BUT I have been manipulated here, more than once, and ive only been here 4 months. I dont call that "not most".

 

[lostforgottensoul]

and THEN posted a link to the thread "in the chat room"

Sweetie, if you open chat fully, the link is at the top of the room before you get to into the room anyway.

Hopefully its read, a lot. Because I for one will start reporting more if in there and im sure most will too.

Dont worry about it. :hug:

 

[Deleted member 33023]

Hope, I've never seen you give a bad bit of advice, in fact, I love hearing what you have to day. J...

Mal thank you so much. I feel the same about you and all my other interactions here. It is a constant worry that I will ever hurt anyone because I sure know what it feels like! I don't ever want anyone to feel left out or not wanted. That not what this site is for. Peace and happiness to all.

 

[UnKnown-Self]

:hug: Back @lostforgottensoul
Rest assured I won't worry about it. I vented, brushed the few flakes of dust off and continue with my purpose of being here. Moving forward.