What Is On Your Mind Right This Second?

[Deanna]

I'm kind of- blah. I was suppose to work today and had to run to the dentist. So, catching- up here. You know, plans got changed.

 

[Tinyflame]

Oh @VioletButterfly :laugh:

Better a bag of coins than an empty one @Ellabella44 :);) :hug:

It's been a beautiful day outside.

 

[Itsnotyouitsme]

Mine is - what have I done in my 26 years of life to deserve any of this? It is a mind bugging question I really want to know the answer to.

 

[M.Mason]

The last time my mom beat me up I was 52 years old with four grown children. Due to PTSD and Stockholmes Syndrome, I couldn't even defend myself because I knew she would beat me worse. My step dad had to pull her off of me. Another one of her drunken rages. She died on Monday. 1-27-2020 I feel guilty about not being sad she is gone. She was the negative factor of the entire family. Now that she is gone, everyone is contacting one another and reaching out in love. We feel free to love one another now that her negativity, meanness and abusiveness is gone. Thanks for letting me vent. I do OK going about my daily life with my wonderful husband for a couple of hours and then I feel scared all over again. What if this is a dream and she is not really gone! Then my husband reassures me that she is gone and it is over. She can never hurt me again. Her passing is such a blessing for our entire family.

One hot mess...

 

[Deanna]

What is on my mind this very second? Has anyone asked themselves how many people will recognize their gone ( or as in death) or how many people noticed you were here on the planet, when you were alive? Mine answer seems to be; very few.

 

[Tornadic Thoughts]

My trains of thought to that intriguing topic, @Deanna , immediately takes me back to thoughts of how no one ever truly noticed the turmoil I was living through at a young age enough to healthily help me through it...

...then I hop to later years when the turmoil was much more visible through constant black eyes/busted lips/damaged property/death threats/etc. and I repeatedly reached out for help via "proper" authorities and such, only to be dismissed....

...then it hops to the many years I wholeheartedly invested blood sweat and tears in work that I loved, but was quickly cast aside when I spoke up regarding unethical happenings in efforts to help many, and after I became severely ill as a result of being made an administrative target and resigned, was very quickly forgotten by all those who vowed to be lifelong friends.

I can't help but think after repeatedly being so easily erased while I'm still very much alive by those who were supposedly the closest to me, how could I ever reckon my presence would be any more valued when I leave this existence. Things that make me go hmmmmm... Therefore, I must be the one to value my own energies every chance I get, I suppose. I've damn sure earned the right to enjoy me. Thanks for that trip on the thought train. Choo! Choo!


What's currently on my mind...after recently seeing pics someone shared from a safari trip...are zebras white with black stripes, or black with white stripes?

 

[Ellabella44]

I've found what I'm going to put my aa coin hoard in. I have a "treasure box" with gargoyles on it on my desk. Haven't put anything of real importance in it till now. Also getting myself a desk minion cat gargoyle mini for the occasion.

 

[VioletButterfly]

Aye matey (@Tinyflame)! I had ESPN, the refs, and the oposing team's coach walking the plank Saturday night! Argh! Glad you got the joke! LOL ??


On my mind today.... I'm worried about my mind and my body. I seem to have developed this after-flu thing that feels like Mono. I'm so exhausted, can't think straight, can't get motivated, am withdrawing even farther, etc... Then, there's the physical side with continual pain, headache and sinus congestion, and my jaws hurting like crazy. Blah! I wish I'd feel better. ?

 

[Ellabella44]

Thinking I have to start getting out of the house more. I know that if I mention going for a walk in the morning before I bring her to her train for school that she will nag me into it.

 

[MrMoonlight]

Going to that local bar just over there. I've never been and I feel like getting a little buzz and seeing what sports are playing on the tv there.

 

[Deanna]

I am sick today so my first thought is feeling better! I can't believe Macys is closing 125 stores! Well I do.. The quality of their stuff was in the sh!tter!

Dead Link Removed

 

[Tinyflame]

Hope you feel better soon @VioletButterfly & @Deanna . :hug: I think I had that @VioletButterfly , I actually almost went one day to the hosp. (Not my choice, ever. :( ) It was wicked. :hug: