• 💖 [Donate To Keep MyPTSD Online] 💖 Every contribution, no matter how small, fuels our mission and helps us continue to provide peer-to-peer services. Your generosity keeps us independent and available freely to the world. MyPTSD closes if we can't reach our annual goal.

What Is On Your Mind Right This Second?

Feel for ya @Lionheart I've no family left that I see. I've a brother but he is quite an impressive arsehole.

I was still making an effort to bleep in touch regularly, but the last time I saw him he said he is too busy to keep in touch with me so I though OK, I'll step back a bit.

I still wished him a Happy Birthday, and he is on my Facebook so I can see he is still alive. 🙄🙃

Anyways on my mind just now, celery is really juicy innit..
 
@Lionheart Idk but Isomeone who died and was revived said they could sort of 'travel' through the hospital and see all of their family and what they were doing. When they came 'back' all of the details were correct (one in a parking lot, one diabetic getting a choc bar out of a candy machine, one crying etc). They said there was no sense of time and they passed effortlessly through walls, and they could be on one side of the hospital then immediately on the other.

Hugs to you. 🤗 💓

Wanted to come back to say @ladee how much I appreciated your candor and gentleness and sharing when it is so raw. You are so wise and kind, and I don't have the ability to express in words how I feel or my gratitude and understanding of what it takes for you to do so, though I wish I could. You and your words and vulnerability are a great gift in my life. Thank you. 💓💓💓

@Tornadic Thoughts and @Teasel despite strains and heartbreak and triggers, I hope that the rest of the month is much sweeter than normal. 🤗🤗

Due to something disturbing at work (wouldn't be for many but I have much fear), as well as when I got home I felt very scared and depleted and devastated last night, skipped eating or washing. This morning I woke up instead and decided to say a prayer about it and one to thank God for when it will pass or improve or be resolved. Also remember a desperate one/ mantra though I hate the term, I learned to say years ago and said that too. Oddly I always get a near fb of saying that one one particular night in the shower.

I have an impossible amount of things I need to do, a call I dread making, a note I dread writing but must and deliver, paperwork i must complete and stuff to pick up time dependent, a few gifts to wrap before tomorrow a.m., a few cards I must do and deliver, and a whole lot of shoveling (less than I expected though) post blizzard and in frigid 50-70 click winds, amongst the regular stuff. I hope I can do it, am putting on the coffee.
 
I think it's normal @Rani G2 to assume the worst explanation if we are in doubt of others' behaviours and don't feel value about ourselves or trust in others or the relationship. I can't speak for @Teasel but if I guess right it probably has little or nothing to do with NPD, unless it's just ignorance of what that might infer, or prejudice based on comparing others one knows with it. Gently I say, if that mistrust is there maybe better to say, I miss you (Teasel), and ask if there was anything you did or said that caused hurt (I don't think so!).

I don't have NPD, but at some point a person has to decide to go out on a limb and look for the good things or contrasting evidence (or not). Right now most people are overly stressed and worried and feel beat(en). I just read today about an employee who confronted an irate anti-masking customer, spoke up, was spit on, and returned to her office and had a heart attack, 4 actually by the end of the day at 54 yrs old. The context (without ptsd) is quite something else, and JMHO but ptsd is a little like that context most of the time without a pandemic.

Hugs to you. 🤗

ETA , I suppose I would add (and there is nothing I've read about this and JMHO of what I experience and of what I've seen in others), but the presence of ptsd makes many simple things difficult- trust and focus being two. I think the average person can focus or hyperfocus more readily or longer or even exaggerate good aspects of any situation, without intrusive thoughts or memories or doubt, and take (more) heart in their reality or hopefullness or be trusting without the same inclination to exhaustion or doubt or fear. Even physical exhaustion is very impactful. But so too is fear, and seeking ways to protect yourself or waiting for the other shoe to drop, and therefore be inclined to mistrust, as the past taught us is necessary and only logical and can bear a heavy weight on what we expect of others or that others are possible of. Fear has many faces. 🤗
 
Last edited:
Gently I say, if that mistrust is there maybe better to say, I miss you (Teasel), and ask if there was anything you did or said that caused hurt (I don't think so!).
@bird_on_a_wire thanks for explaining, actually I was being honest and I wanted to know if I have said anything disrespectful? It isn’t my intention to sound reproachful. I like the way Teasel expresses herself but I felt that suddenly there was an interruption. I was never officially diagnosed with NPD, the one psychiatrist that mentioned NPD never did the relevant tests to confirm the Diagnosis.
Right now most people are overly stressed and worried
Yes!
Wishing you a good Day
 
@bird_on_a_wire thanks for explaining, actually I was being honest and I wanted to know if I have said anything disrespectful? It isn’t my intention to sound reproachful. I like the way Teasel expresses herself but I felt that suddenly there was an interruption. I was never officially diagnosed with NPD, the one psychiatrist that mentioned NPD never did the relevant tests to confirm the Diagnosis.

Yes!
Wishing you a good Day
What's NPD?
 
Keeping it together tomorrow morning for my daughters and their families, especially the grandchildren, for the early morning annual Christmas Eve Breakfast at 8:30, at my house (a blessing but I have NO say on the time). then presents and hopefully cleanup?? I am just recovering from TKR and am all knotted up in my legs. I have got to try to cook bacon (oven) and chocolate gravy and biscuits. Everyone going to come HERE and cook what they are making! It is going to be NOISY (Which is a TRIGGER) and crowded, and I am going to feel responsible for taking care of everything despite the fact that I cannot get around. OMG just thinking about it takes my breath away!! You asked what is on my mind this second...
 
Back
Top