Sufferer Some of my story (newtothis) - Chased from 4th story & severe medical trauma

[Mr O]

Hi I'm new on here just seeing what . A little over two years ago I fell or was chased from a fourth floor window of a tower block, I broke and fracture almost every rib ,my left knee cap was broken into five peices also right knee into 6 peices. I spent nearly five weeks in a coma and fractured my elbow had my lung drained and also had a fractured eye socket and broke my jaw in 7 places ? I now suffer and been diagnosed with Cptsd I've struggled for two years and now because of my anxiety and decision making I lost my ex partner in December last year I suffer day and night I try staying awake because I hate the flashbacks and severe fear of dying fear that someone is gonna try and hurt me I sleep only when my body shuts down I then ended up homeless after mum n dad couldn't cope I'm now all alone and feel I have no one and am still waiting after all this time for mental health services to help I couldn't walk for two years and in pain still now every day constant reminder of what happened I can't stand sudden noises creaking doors slamming doors or shouting and feel like I can't trust even the closest of freinds sometimes I'll question everything any one asks me I've had episodes where I've even made a cab driver take me to police station cos I didn't trust him I feel stupid and embarrassed after these episodes but still it reacurres time and time again and it doesn't warn me it can happen anywhere all of a sudden I'm sick of being alone and scared and I feel hopeless and that I'll never be me ever again I also worry I'm gonna completely lose my mind sometimes I'm currently awaiting other diagnoses after an MRI scan recently and problems with the sight in my right eye thanks for listening x

 

[blackemerald1]

Hello @Mr O - welcome to the forum. I hope you find this place supportive.

I now suffer and been diagnosed with Cptsd

am still waiting after all this time for mental health services to help

^ Who diagnosed you with cptsd if you are then still waiting for assistance?

Are you still homeless or have you found a place to stay?

It really does sound as if you need some strong support for your mental health condition as well as the physical injuries. Are you able to advocate for a therapist to assist you sooner? I find it amazing that you have suffered such severe injuries and so much effort has been put into patching you back together however your emotional and psychological injuries are made to wait. :rolleyes:

 

[Mr O]

Hello @Mr O - welcome to the forum. I hope you find this place supportive.




^ Who diagnosed you with cptsd if you are then still waiting for assistance?

Are you still homeless or have you found a place to stay?

It really does sound as if you need some strong support for your mental health condition as well as the physical injuries. Are you able to advocate for a therapist to assist you sooner? I find it amazing that you have suffered such severe injuries and so much effort has been put into patching you back together however your emotional and psychological injuries are made to wait. :rolleyes:

I got sent round in a big circle and therapist I had was useless but it was actually my pain consultant who diagnosed me with it . Then I've been waiting for appointments and missed a couple but only because I was nervous or in pain or had no sleep and no I gt put In to temp accomodation ATM where it's noisy and near carparks big triggers everywhere and I've been dealin with all this alone since a few months ago. Thank u and I'm just hoping they sort me somewhere that doesn't have any tower blocks near it they absolutely horrify me everytime I see one it's mainly pain no sleep and worry almost constantly. It was very and is still very traumatic I've pushed everyone away because of what happened .???

 

[littleoc]

I’m so sorry for everything that’s happened. Of course you’re overwhelmed, how could you not be after all of that?

This place helped me so much, so I’m positive it will help you too. At the very least, know you aren’t alone. It’s great to see you reaching out here like you are.

It won’t be like this forever. You will get better, even if “only” mentally and emotionally! :hug: :hug:

 

[Mr O]

Yeh well I really appreciate it kind words and I just don't see me ever not being afraid my body is so fragile and it makes me feel vunurable all the pain Ive endured and still doing aswell is nothing compared to the mental torture and paranoia being up all night I'm so afraid and keep thinking someone wants to get me it's like it's instilled in my head I dunno why or who or even if it wi ever stop it's hard to believe it gets better but thank u ? I'm gna see if this site can help meabye it will I've gta try whatever I can I'm at my wit's end with it all

 

[blackemerald1]

If the danger is real and immediate then you need to call the Police - staying safe is critical.

If you know it is not real but feel that way because of your past trauma then you need some support from a psychologist, psychiatrist or a therapist. There is a lot to be gained by working with someone to help you through this time.

I think you are still healing from the mental trauma and it's ok to need help that way too.

Maybe you need some medications too. I don't know but they (professionals) will.

 

[Mr O]

Yeh ur right there I had an assessment again last Friday and I have someone from housing coming tomorrow...meds I have tried loads and currently still on lots of meds for pain and anxious bothseems to really work . I just need support like u say but I can honestly say there's not a day goes by without thinking about what happened and I just hope I get the help I need Ty?

 

[blackemerald1]

I had an assessment again last Friday

^That's good. I hope that something beneficial comes from this.

I have someone from housing coming tomorrow

^That's really good. Hopefully you will be provided with somewhere safe and peaceful to live. Just this aspect alone can be incredibly important in terms of you healing and recalibrating. I hope it goes well.

currently still on lots of meds for pain and anxious bothseems to really work

^Again... well done. Stick with the meds if they are helping. Being in pain or freaking out are counter-productive so if you have got something that works leaning on them at least in the short term until other matters such as housing and mental health support are implemented, is a good thing.

I just need support like u say

^And you should ask for it and continue to ask for it. Work out what kind of support would best suit you and say it to the ppl who can either give it or help you find it.

there's not a day goes by without thinking about what happened

You, me and most everyone on this board! You are are not alone with this problem - we all have our memories, recollections, flashbacks, triggers etc etc. It sort of comes with the territory. But also hear this. You will get better, stronger and manage your symptoms if you keep working on it. It's slow, glacially slow and even tumbling backwards seems to be part of the process. Most if not all of us here have done or experienced some of this. Just keep trying.

I just hope I get the help I need

^I hope you do too. So here are some tips I can think of...be your own best friend, be persistent and patient. Advocate for yourself and believe that you know what is best for yourself and you always have choices though sometimes they are are not great choices lol...

Read what is on this forum because there is loads of stuff about trauma and how to obtain help and how to help yourself, what this monster is...

Best :)

 

[Mr O]

I appreciate that and I almost feel ignorent because people say it gets better and tell me it will be easier to controll but I just don't see that I'm always being challenged with more greif and it all starts back at the beginning and I start all over again it's like my life is always on repeat .thank you I'll keep browsing I'm sure I'll find some answers

God bless ?

 

[Ronin]

Hi, welcome.

You say you wind up homeless... what were the developments with your parents since then?

Did you try to talk to your parents since, is there any chance they would support you cos it been some time already & maybe things cooled out from before & they miss you?

 

[Mr O]

Yeh was made homeless and the council put me in temporary accommodation it was pai full and hard for me to go in there but had no choice mum and dad had enough of my anger and screaming out in the night and we are dti not talking we spoke but they always seem to end up in an argument with me I e never really got on with my stepdad anyway he's stringent ... I've never known who my real father is .
I'm getting some help from a service where I live do fingers crossed they help I've not had any care professionally since I was in hospital the second time with a limb thtratening knee infection ?

 

[blackemerald1]

I start all over again it's like my life is always on repeat

^This is very much a hallmark of ptsd. But with a lot of intervention by yourself and with help from professionals this pattern can subside and you may surprise yourself by breaking into new patterns and new ground.

There are ppl on this forum that work, have entered into and maintained successful relationships, started and finished formal education.... done heaps of amazing things. Ptsd isn't a dead end... well it will be if you let it but it doesn't have to be.

I'll find some answers

It's important that you realise that answers to one are not to another. We are all such individuals... so don't be disappointed if you have to look and read a lot. The basic information about ptsd doesn't differ but it's treatment does. And sometimes, we change and something that didn't suit or appeal to us last year, seems to be a good choice this year.