Fed Up With The Rollercoaster Of Emotion

[Heather]

, I woke last night :sleep: with the lyrics going around in my head

Are you sure that is the only thing Kath? He He:devilish::p:D

 

[KP the nut]

Knew if I went out something bad would happen
Very triggered. Blue flashing lights, talking to firefighters, showed them where the fire was.
Shaking
Tears
Anxious
Physical pain

 

[intothelight]

(((KP)))

Keep breathing and know you are in our thoughts.

Deb

 

[Heather]

Kath --

I'm with Deb. Slow deep breaths. You're gonna be okay. We're here for you.

HUGS and MUCH LOVE. Heather.

 

[KP the nut]

Keep breathing

(((Deb))) thank you.
(((BIW))) (((NYRay))) (((Don))) (((Heather))) (((Anyone I missed - sorry)))

I am calmer. Thank you my friends for reminding me to breathe, ground, drink, eat and telling me I'm safe. I will head off to bed soon, with a couple of painkillers and my dogs.

As equally stupid Scarlett O'Hara said in Gone with the Wind - 'tomorrow is another day'

(((HUGS)))
KP

 

[Reclusive]

I'm glad to hear you're feeling better - sounds like you had quite the experience! I'm sorry to hear about your appeal - I don't know how it works where you are, but I wasn't able to get anywhere without legal representation. Something to consider?

 

[tigrou465]

Thinking strongly about you and sending positive energy.... ;)Hang in there... As in Annie's play.... "the sun will come out tomorrow, bet your bottom dollard... Hugs and kisses

 

[KP the nut]

I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you as friends. I have been much calmer today. The dogs worked their magic overnight, leaning against me and letting me hold them like teddy bears.

The weather this week has been glorious, sun and blue sky everyday. I have taken advantage and sat in the garden reading a book and drinking coffee - bliss. I often miss the mornings as it takes so long to get my act together. However with H being away and committing myself to do volunteer drives, I've had to be up, showered, dressed, dogs walked and had breakfast by a set time. I've been out of bed by 8am, a miracle for me.

Tomorrow will be the BIG challenge. I am meeting my daughter and we are going on to do some very serious retail therapy. Unfortunately this means I must have everything done by 7.15am :eek:. My alarm will go off at 5.45am :eek::eek:. I need to give myself plenty of time to triple check I have everything, money, phone, keys, iPod, bag...........

Then plenty of time to drive to the station, park the car, pay for parking, buy a train ticket and get to the platform for the 7.58 train. I'll be exhausted but will have 90 mins on the train to relax - if I get a seat.

H is also coming home tomorrow - a day early :inlove::):tup:.

(((HUGS)))
KP

 

[KP the nut]

I've had a really nice few days. Shopping with my daughter so nice. We didn't buy much, just did some window shopping, drank coffee and had lunch. The train journeys both ways went without a hitch.

I did another volunteer car drive on Fri. I should have done chores but couldn't get going. I did eventually. When H came home we went and sat at the top of the garden in the sunshine and had a lovely champagne cocktail.

Today I've been gardening, weeding some pots and planting some colour. Feel tired now and will go lie down for an hour.

I feel positive, I think I am at a turning point. I will have bad days but I feel I can come through them. I can't wait to see T on Wed and see what he makes of me. H took my hand last night and said how pleased he is that I seem happier.

 

[amethist]

Nice one KP.

Good to read some postive things for a change, no matter how small to others, still postive to you. :tup:

As for the chores, they will still be there another day, when the sun is not shining. ;)

 

[KP the nut]

I am trying to write a job application. It is a job which is perfect, the job description was written for me and matches my experience and it is a role I love. I know the company and have spoken to a contact there. She hoped I would apply.

However when it comes to writing why I'm perfect for this, the self doubt and unworthiness come pouring back.:notworthy:

I have made a start, small steps a bit each day. I MUST do this.

 

[Reclusive]

It might help to make a list of the things in the job description that you match so well. And then make a list of 'extras' that you have in your experience and toolbag that would also add to your perfection. Then, using the lists, write it out as if writing about someone else. Even use someone else's name if you need to, then find + replace.

I'm SO excited for you!