Feeling Like I Am Dying In The Inside

[Marie E.]

CB thank you, I will try to sort it out that way, better than getting myself all worked up.

 

[KP the nut]

You are certainly not weak. The thought above are good (as usual, advice and support amazing).

Can you speak to your phone provider, they can monitor his call and even block them.

Keep strong and safe

You are not alone, Maze, you sort him out for me as well:mad:

KP

 

[Marie E.]

I'm glad I'm not the only one angry lol! I'm thinking I could change my number, be done with him. I will get my phone bill soon enough as I have a cellphone. I'm going to deal with the voice mails first. I am going talk to my T today to help me do what is right. Most likely I will be talking to the cops, showing them the voice mails and he only lives a block away. He better start thinking twice after this!!!!!!! I will keep everyone updated.

 

[Turtle]

When I was having problems with an ex bf my T offered to go to the police with me since she knew how scared I was. It ment a lot that she was willing to come but I decided that I wanted my carer to go since he knew a few cops and helped things run smoothly for me, as well as offer support and a hand that didn't mind being squeezed to death!

I hope all goes well for you!

 

[Marie E.]

I still feel like a failure as I just now got through my session with my T. I made plans with her. I couldn't bring up to call the cops on my former b/f. I wish I could just do it right away. I plan on changing my number, calling cops on him if he shows up and getting a restraining order on him on Mon. :(

 

[KP the nut]

I still feel like a failure as I just now got through my session with my T. I made plans with her. I couldn't bring up to call the cops on my former b/f. I wish I could just do it right away. I plan on changing my number, calling cops on him if he shows up and getting a restraining order on him on Mon. :(

If you feel that's right then it is right. You are not a failure, repeat YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE:p. You are just not ready to cope with this today.

If you feel harassed over the weekend call the police.

Is there anyone who could go to cops on Monday with you?

Be strong, be brave and look after yourself

KP

 

[Marie E.]

I want to go to the court house on Mon and former case manager gave me some information about it and as well as more support if I need it.

I was going to get cough medicine for my older kid, I opened my back door and my ex left a big bag there full of things, a few things I gave him he gave back. I know he still has some things, but I think he wants to keep a few of the toys for the kids I left there, in memory of them. Toys can be replaced, most toys my kids have.

 

[KP the nut]

I want to go to the court house on Mon and former case manager gave me some information about it and as well as more support if I need it.

I was going to get cough medicine for my older kid, I opened my back door and my ex left a big bag there full of things, a few things I gave him he gave back. I know he still has some things, but I think he wants to keep a few of the toys for the kids I left there, in memory of them. Toys can be replaced, most toys my kids have.

Maybe that means he is going to move on. You are right toys can be replaced.

Stand firm. Don't take anymore crap!

 

[Marie E.]

Yeah, I was hoping to take this as a sign that his dumb butt will move on. Everyday I pray that he finds another woman to bother and I go on that till he starts calling. He hasn't called today. I will start moving more on with my life. :)

 

[deer_in_headlights]

Hi Marie,

I have a stalker in my life. One big thing, is don't change your phone number, yet. This is really important. You need to keep the voicemails and the records of his calls. These are great proofs of harassment and stalking. You can really nail him with this.

Also, if you change your phone #, then he will become very obsessed about getting your new one. He'll have it in no time, someone obsessed like that will call all your close contacts to find your new number, and be really manipulative to get it from them. Experts advise that you keep your old number, and use it to record his calls... then get a second, unlisted number, and use that one as your primary phone.

Also, don't pick up the phone, ever, to talk to him... even to tell him to leave you alone. He learns that if he calls you 50 times, and you finally pick up in distress, then that's the price he willingly pays to get at you. A restraining order is a very good thing to have, but be forewarned, that the first few days after a restraining order is placed, depending upon the persona, if they're going to get violent, that is usually the time. If he's just a blowhard bully as they typically are, he'll deflate and disappear. But if he has been violent in the past, or has weapons, you'll want to ask the police to confiscate any firearms he might have access to. You'll also want to have an overnight bag packed, car gassed up, all the essentials, and a shelter or safe place lined up that you can go to if you feel very unsafe after he's served with the papers.

A very good book to read is one called "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin de Becker. His book and advice has helped me tremendously, and got my stalker institutionalized. Mr. de Beckers group provides protection for people ranging from visiting dignitaries, movie stars, and ordinary people who are being harassed.

The police are invaluable and good ones will bring comfort, support and a wonderful sense of protection. (We had troopers, unasked and unexpectedly, sitting in their cars in our driveway for a long time... it brought tears to my eyes when I'd walk down the drive and see a policeman munching his lunch or catching up on paperwork.. and protecting me!)

Sending hugs if you take 'em!
Keep that fire of indignation! It helps fuel you through the process of getting this guy off your back!
With concern and love,
Deer

 

[Marie E.]

Deer

-Yes I think it is good to keep the voice mails and number for my safety.

-Yeah it would be a good idea to get a second phone with a different number.

-Yeah I don't pick up the phone anymore, maybe that is why he is not calling yet today?

-I am scared that he will get violent after I issue a restraining order, make me nervous. Though the closest to physical abuse is that he would block my entry and I do see the violent spark in his eyes as he refused to leave me alone and that is why I only lasted a month living with him till I moved back to my old place that I am at now.

-Yeah I don't pick up the phone anymore, maybe that is why he is not calling yet today?

-I am scared that he will get violent after I issue a restraining order, make me nervous. Though the closest to physical abuse is that he would block my entry and I do see the violent spark in his eyes as he refused to leave me alone and that is why I only lasted a month living with him till I moved back to my old place that I am at now.

-Of course I will take your hugs (((Big Hugs)) Thanks soooo much for your support, it really helps!!

 

[Marie E.]

Some way, some how, I now feel as if I lost myself being with that man and now I have to strive to get it back.:(