New in my life due to medical treatment

[KA60]

OK. This may not be quite ok for this group. I have a related womebs group for this. I reached out to them. But I am pissed. I have had estrogen treatment for severe menopausal symptoms. It has helped a lot. But.... my breast size has increased. My ob gyn said it can happen. But husband now giving me too much attention for it. Not ok. My first deceased husband had onkine porn addiction. He was so distracted by it it contributed to his death. He could not focus on himself or his health. I was a stupid codependent trying to save him and I got catastrophically sick trying to save him. Any way I told my husband finally this am his attention for this is bugging the hell out of me. I am putting my tops that are lower cut revealing cleavage in the trash. I got domestic violence treatment due to first deceased husband so if I am getting attention for this from him I could be getting it elsewhere. For medical treatment!. He uses the word kitties
Your titties
look could this am etc. He is a good man but does not understand boundaries like I do. Frankly I feel ashamed humiliated for no good damn reason apparently. Except there is a reason- my body is my own. It belongs to me. Yes I am in tears over this. Thank you.

 

[Sideways]

That’s pretty disrespectful.

Can you explain to hubby the impact that his comments are having on you? Sometimes that helps a person understand why when you ask them to stop doing something.

 

[KA60]

Thank you for the support. It is distasteful. Yes I explained it. I will over and over if I have to. My toos with lower cuts are now in the trash can.

 

[Movingforward10]

He should hear you and stop commenting on your breasts.
I'm sorry you are feeling you have to change what you wear.

Him not hearing you and continuing even though he knows it makes you uncomfortable, is not healthy relationship behaviour.

 

[KA60]

You are right. If I have not been clear in my posts the root issue / cause is his beliefs in coming apolcslypse. He denies it but true. I have to face a lot of fear from this . I got critically ill may 2014 . Went into cardiopulmonary arrest..The consequence of his beliefs? For me I am standing up against the sick.politucs in the US. I email senators congress in my state on behalf of social security. I have found a local church here - the pastor is from Nigeria and a place maker. He is just a high conflict person. I asked him today to just hold me when I feal this fear. To help me with this fear. That there is a future where despite difficulties changes we will still be here. It is massive cognitive dissonce I am dealing with. This breast fondling issue just got to frequent. Thank you for your comment. I am so grateful for this group. He is a veteran has medicaid. He will lose it. He won't get help from the VA. I have medicare and a supplement so I have health care. He really is a good man. No wanting to fondle talk about my breasts like this got really distracting. We are busy with 2 dogs. I have made some friends contacts in our community. No He will not get therapy. No He will not participate in couples counseling..we separate we risk serious financial consequrnces it is likely our dogs would have to be euthanized. I really do love him..I told him I survived what I did partly to stand up against the psychopathology in the US. I don't know what else to do. Go on with life. Keep setting boundaries.