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Such thing as sharing too much?

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LucyLou

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I've finished writing up for therapy. It's like a novel 🙈 I didn't think it would be so long but I've shared so much. About a couple of memories I have, the body memory thing, how difficult it is to talk about the ab*se, I don't know if it's too long and I should take bits off and save for another session? Or do I send it as it is and she has it to come back to? I don't know. It feels like a proper trauma dump and it's heavy stuff.
 
I don't know really because I feel like alot went into me writing it up. So maybe i should send but I know how heavy it is and I don't want it to be too hard for therapist to read
 
such a thing as sharing too much with my therapists? that's what i pay them for. i want my nickel's worth. therapists are contracted professionals, not romantic partners or drinking buddies. my journal is handwritten, but i feel free to send my contracted pros copies of verbal vomit by snail mail. it often helped them prepare for the next session. i like pros who care enough to do their homework.
 
I don't want it to be too hard for therapist to read
You’re still alive, so it’s not the worst thing they’ve read.

As an undergrad, psych majors are exposed to terrible things on a group/past/distance model; in masters future psychologists & MSWs are exposed to terrible things on a much closer & more relevant model (people dying & being rendered vegetables & gruesomely maimed happening right here/now -who are not your client, but in your specialty- as well as 1:1 or 2:1 that are your client, whilst you have your supervisor & other grad students & your personal therapist to lean on / learn to handle the depths of other people’s pain. Then a couple thousand hours of interning, with “just” a supervisor, your colleagues, & your therapist. 8-15 years after starting? (7-10 years of school, plus internship/supervision) You’re on your “own” with “just” a personal therapist, and your colleagues.

Unless you have a Craptastic McTherapist with no education or training? Someone who just paid the $30 fee with the state, or applied for a religious exempt? Or is a student? You T has a least a decade of being intimately involved with exactly what you went through…. “To death”… tacked on at the end.

You’re PAYING them to be an expert in their field.

So they can help you.

Not so that you can protect them from their chosen avocation.

Let it rip.

And if it’s so long you’re afraid of the time it would take to read? (Like 50 pages, when most people read about a minute per page).
- Add bullet points, for what strikes YOU as most important, or use a highlighter, etc.
- Book a double session
 
What @Friday said. Don't hold back. Let your therapist have it all. It will help them to be able to help you. I have a really hard time talking about the bad stuff. It's so hard for me to say the words, but I can write it. I often email stuff I've written to my therapist and we talk about it at the next session. Another option, if you're comfortable with it, is to read what you've written to your therapist in a session.
 
That's a sensitive subject for me especially as when I wrote out a statement it was typed up by clerical staff. One of whom I knew.
Imagine my wife learning from her what I couldn't speak to her about.
Bottom line, I had to pursue the breach the confidentiality and she was fired.
Only my wife couldn't un-hear what she had said. The stress caused me to relapse.
Confidentiality? I've never written anything down or allowed tapes to be used again.
 
originally asked her to delete, without reading it.....but I resent it at 5.30 this morning and I'm glad I did now. She was amazing and let me 100% control it and let me skip the memory stuff that I didn't want to talk about. Feeling a little proud of myself here. I got a bit emotional/disconnected, so we had to stop for some grounding but I did what I could!
 
I don't want my next session to be another heavy one, it can't be. My little ones break up from school on Fri. I hate feeling like I haven't been clear. Although I'm probably overthinking this. I'm going to email her again- I bet she's sick of hearing from me 🙈 We spoke briefly about the ab*se the other day and she knows there were multiple perpetrators but I didn't say much....say how one of them would do things in the day and the other at the night. I don't know how many times or even if they overlapped - that's disgusting, isn't it 🤮 I don't even know if they knew what the other was doing....If they knew it was the both of them. I had this whole meltdown last night, driving home from my mum and dad's. I had to pull over and call mu friend....she had me round her house from 10.30pm until after midnight! I'm feeling anxious today, hopefully that settles soon! I'll send her this but also tell her to shelf this for now but I have to send it. I think this next session, I'm going to have to tackle a less heavy subject, so will be about the eating disorder/ being reluctant to join the gym again, because I know I'll start being obsessive about the scales etc I don't want to get into all the bad habits around food but I think that's where it will lead (does anyone else have an ED and have this issue) Thanks
 
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