The Beast Vs. Me

[Grizzly]

It's a heightened sense that most people are going to do stupid things.

Amen Brother.

 

[Grizzly]

One thing the freaks me out when driving are overpasses. I see them. My first thoughts are something is going to pop up and lob something my direction. Every time it nearly puts me into a panic.

 

[thomas.robinson.54966]

I think I won round one Today it was a good brawl. But I kept the monster in check. Read my posts in relationships and you could guess why. The monster would get out and I would push that f*cker back in.

 

[Friday]

I love driving. Guess it makes me the oddball out. But I can crank up my music until it flows over me, and through me, and I can feel it in my bones. Total sensory overload washes everything else but the movement of the car and I through space, and the music around me. Regulate panic attacks by catching my heartbeat and then gradually playing slower tempos. Open up the engine and have to pay really strict attention to detail. Get all lazy and cock a leg up on the dash (clearly, not a stick) and just coast. City driving is okay, too. I just assume everyone is trying to kill me, so the stupid shit is half assed at best. It's enervating to constantly be watching axels and routes and trajectories and the body language of drivers to get an idea of what they're going to do next. I like the flow, the patterns, and weaving through it. I played bumper cars a lot down south, so I never really feel trapped up here. I'm choosing to sit in a traffic jam. Easy enough to make a hole.

But I also just think more clearly with the highway sliding beneath my ass.

 

[Friday]

The only thing about driving that makes me touchy are dead cars on the side of the road. I hate that. Oregon & Kentucky are the worst for it. Mmmm. Also roads with sheer drops. Hwy 101 can bite me.

Although I swear to God I stared an elk down twice on this past trip. I will speed up and nail your ass, don't even think about it, and they turned and ran the other direction instead of crossing! Ha.

 

[holdenmonty]

Traffic drives me crazy but I have found another thing at work that makes my blood boil... So long story short I'm in a 1 deep position doing admin support for 50 people. It's busy most of the time I understand it but the thing that drives me nuts is when I get 10 different tasks dropped on me all in the matter of an hour and expected to get them all done as soon as I possibly can... I usually write down what all I am expected to get done and then go for what my therapist calls a wellness walk where I get away from my desk and go outside for about 10 minutes and do my best to compose myself so I don't have a panic attack or verbally rip somebodies head off