Told Psychologist How I Am Feeling

[canucklady]

I told psychologist how I was feeling. I'm really depressed and lowest point ever. Not sure why.

She asked and was truthful for once. She asked for permission to talk to psychiatrist. I signed the form. But now not so sure that was good idea. Psychiatrist could hospitalize me, and I am terrified of that. If psych asks, I don't think I can be as truthful with her.

I'm just scared. I don't want to go to hospital.

 

[digger]

Have you heard back from them? How are you feeling now?

 

[Lucycat]

Please don't be scared. Be proud of your honesty. Your psychologist wants to help you. My T has regularly discussed me with a psychiatrist, and that helps him plan where to go with therapy when things are a little unstable - or that should be when I am a little unstable!

Whatever it takes to make you feel better, they are there to help you.
Best wishes
Lucy x

 

[arfie]

Congratulations on your courage. There is no such thing as courage in the absence of fear. You are afraid and being honest anyway. That is courage in the highest. May you continue to find the courage to go where your brave honesty leads you.

If there is a way to heal without honesty, I have yet to find it. I promise I have looked. Hard.

 

[Britt.f7]

I encourage you to continue being honest. They might not recommend a hospital yet. If they do, then consider it. After I hit rock bottom last year I hospitalized myself. It was after the recommendation of my doctor and husband. I was scared to death, but more afraid of what would happen if I didn't. The first day or so at the hospital was difficult, but it got better after I became more familiar with it and they adjusted my meds. Every person's treatment is different of course. I wish you honesty and support for your courage.

 

[Raisin]

When you really need it (if you do) hospital isn't such a bad place. I have had 11 voluntary admissions. It can be a true "asylum" a safe place to be when you need help to stay safe.

I know I often feel embarrassed telling my P-doc about wanting to self harm or feeling suicidal but if I can't tell him he can't help me. I hope you feel better soon, but if you don't, do your best to keep your therapist & psychiatrist in the loop. They only want you to be safe & feel better.

 

[canucklady]

It happens every year, I get triggered by anniversary dates coming up. I should be used to it, but every year I think it will be different yet it isn't.

Just tired of getting triggered so easily. So many things have happened in past and I can't seem to control the nightmares. It is like my brain in stuck on repeat and every year I remember more and more of what happened when I was younger. I don't even know what is real anymore. I called my psychologist and I have appt with her tomorrow, but now not even sure if it will help.

Part of me wants to just give up, part of me is saying I can't trust anyone, and another part is thinking none of the memories are true. I get up every morning and dread facing the day, yet then a part of me just gets up and just goes through the motions.Then last week at psychiatrist's office, another therapist opens the door while we were still in session, we got triggered big time, not sure why. On top of the previous trigger of a bunch of teenagers hanging out at entrance of doctor's office, which freaked me out as well.

Just triggers upon triggers lately, on top of anniversary reaction. Just too much sometimes.

Not sure what the point is really.