I've done alot lately. I did alot today. I can feel my stress levels fluctuating and just wish I had more room in my cup without having to put my wellbeing first. The positive things that are supposed to help empty my cup may be just enough to keep me going.
I'm stressed, exhausted and want to do more but, my body put on the brakes. I went from gettin' it all done to holding my head up with my hands. Catching myself with my forehead on the countertop, wrapped up in my arms.
It's frustrating but, airing this out felt like it could be helpful. I hated the idea of stopping and now rest seems attainable. I only had a few more things to do before I would normally feel at ease. It'll just have to wait.
The thought that I only had a few more things to do conflicts with my last statement of always staying busy. Why do I keep forgetting this factor? When I think I finally got a hold on my ptsd symptoms something like this reminds me that it's a lifelong battle. Atleast my symptoms are better than a year ago, 10 years ago, ugh 20 years? Geez, I only gained the tools to fight this about 5 years ago. So maybe before that wouldn't be fair to count.
I'm stressed, exhausted and want to do more but, my body put on the brakes. I went from gettin' it all done to holding my head up with my hands. Catching myself with my forehead on the countertop, wrapped up in my arms.
It's frustrating but, airing this out felt like it could be helpful. I hated the idea of stopping and now rest seems attainable. I only had a few more things to do before I would normally feel at ease. It'll just have to wait.
The thought that I only had a few more things to do conflicts with my last statement of always staying busy. Why do I keep forgetting this factor? When I think I finally got a hold on my ptsd symptoms something like this reminds me that it's a lifelong battle. Atleast my symptoms are better than a year ago, 10 years ago, ugh 20 years? Geez, I only gained the tools to fight this about 5 years ago. So maybe before that wouldn't be fair to count.