As for posting here, I think if you are sincere, respectful, and looking to get help or insight, you will be accepted here, with or without PTSD. I think most of the community can spot people in trouble and looking for help.
I agree with this, generally. And the proof is in the pudding...there are also people who appear to be looking for help and then post repeatedly about how help is unattainable...That might be a person going through a really rough patch, but even then, they can usually acknowledge their own pattern.
People who say they want help, but really want internet drama and attention? That's annoying as f*ck.
how it's said sometimes by some people more than content.
Kind of par for the course, since most of the people here are living with some level of PTSD. Which means, they have shitty days. Or - they are just extremely direct. I don't think you're asking for advice, but the most supportive thing a member can do in a situation where they think the OP is getting unfairly judged, is
post to the OP. If you can offer support and empathy, by all means, do it. The least useful thing is to argue with the member you think is being an asshole. That just derails things. But also....plenty of members here are much more sensitive than others, and that can turn into feelings getting hurt.
The great thing is - it's temporary hurt, and the more we practice that, the better we are at recovering in real-life situations that are hard or stressful.
My concern is always, actually, for the individual poster. When people are in pain, and for whatever reason PTSD makes sense to them as the reason for it...
PTSD is one of the more palatable mental illnesses. Easier to swallow. If you have PTSD, you can believe it's
not because of some unexplainable genetic factor - that there's something wrong with your mind - no. Instead,
an event happened to you, and as a result, you
developed PTSD.
That's a lot easier for people to swallow than to maybe face the fact that they are bipolar. Or have a personality disorder. Or on the schizophrenia spectrum. Or, or, or. Those things can be more frightening than PTSD. PTSD means - something terrible happened to you. Bi-polar disorder means...well, it means something's wrong with you. That's hard as hell to accept.
And of course, actually having PTSD - that's hard as hell to accept, too. That's the irony.
In my experience, people who are eager to assume the identity of being a person with PTSD, often don't actually have PTSD. They probably have some bad shit that's happened to them, and they are 100% deserving of help and healing. And, if they are willing to examine themselves, change their behaviors...then they'll start to feel better, and their growth and healing will help the whole board believe that growth and healing can happen. So, those people - they are fine, with or without an 'official' diagnosis.
But...if they get hooked on the validation, but don't progress to challenging themselves, even in the smallest of ways...and they spend too much time here? Eventually, they will start to pathologize Every. Single. Thing. Scared to go to the store? It's PTSD. So they accept it as their fate, and stay stuck. Learned helplessness, it's a thing.
So - when there are people posting here, and they are looking for a diagnosis - looking to see themselves in the members here - and they see something familiar they think "yes! That's me!" - but...a few threads down the road it becomes clear that they are selectively ignoring other symptoms, ones they are more uncomfortable with....or, they are building up their own sense of how sick they are, based on what they read here - those people? Being here doesn't help them. It still doesn't mean they end up leaving, or being removed. They might take themselves off, or we might do it for them. It has a lot to do with how they conduct themselves, much more than whether there's a dx or not.
But spreading misinformation about the condition? Not ok. Thinking that anxiety+depression+bad thing that happened , equals PTSD? Incorrect, misleading, unhelpful.
Wanting to learn about PTSD
because it affects your life in some way? That's amazing. Wanting that terrible breakup to be on par with that terrible bombing, because 'trauma is subjective'? Nope.
Willing to admit you're wrong, or to change your mind about something? Fantastic. Soapboxing (and defending) bullshit? No.
Them's my thoughts.
