Guilty Conscience

[Finuki]

Most people will be agreeable of their own accord, but could then be advised otherwise by their attorney, thus will then recant their previous agreement.

A polygraph is not a tried and true method of determining guilt or innocence, so many attorneys will advise against it. Don't read too much into it, let the attorneys do their job and its their job (not yours) to find the loopholes and create the reasonable doubt.

Don't allow suspicion into your mind, it only further poisons your outlook and destroys your mood/coping. I deal with suspicion a lot and yes, I know it's hard to recover from the suspicious outlook but try to refrain from judging or answering questions you cannot possibly find the answers to. It's best for you to take the standpoint of allowing it to be what it is, while you continue to work on healing you.

Concentrate on yourself, your coping, your strength and your future successes not motives of others that you can't possibly know - be aware of the thinking errors from day to day. You have every right to be afraid but don't let it rule you. Hugs.

 

[Gebusa]

Don't allow suspicion into your mind

I'm not sure what you mean by this?

The man I accused of abusing me backed out of a polygraph and hired an attorney. It sucks, and... I was hoping to feel a sense of affirmation knowing that it looked sketchy, he ended up getting off on a loophole, so I won't get the closure of a day in court. I did try to be objective asking my question though... wasn't looking for false sympathy, just for people's reactions, but.... it's hard, that's all.

 

[Ubobo]

Sorry, I know it's hard.

I reported my abuser knowing that nothing would ever come of it. No evidence other than an accusation obviously goes nowhere. At this point you need to recognize that you did everything you could to bring him to justice. And unfortunately, that has to be enough, as continuing to focus on him will delay healing. Please find a way to let it go. My release process was not that long from deciding to report through reporting through letting it go. I know it is likely longer for others. But, I do know that your abuser deserves not even a second more of your thoughts. Please turn the focus solely toward healing now.

 

[Rotowi]

My T told me once that it is important in the healing process when you have PTSD to take action even if it goes nowhere other than relief for you. I would not think it is suspicious normally to back out of a polygraph because they are not consistently reliable. In your scenario definitely because you know they are the perpetrator.

 

[Umabo]

Thank you all. I try not to doubt myself, and focus on healing. It's hard, but I'm doing pretty well I think.

 

[Izo]

You know your truth and not only that but you had the courage to stand up for yourself. You have everything to be proud of and nothing to feel badly about.

I hope you find some peace with this.

You know there was no innocent motivation behind an evasion of a polygraph in this case and I hope that can be enough eventually.

 

[Zututur]

Aww thank you Izo, that's very kind and helpful. Sometimes I struggle with my memories, it's hard to stomach them, but you're right.