Never leaves my body

[Punky143]

I think everyone has their own definition of what they call "home." My definition of home is safe, a place where you can be yourself but it comes with a lot of responsibilities. My point, I dislike our apartment neighbors for many valid reasons. I'm trying to deal with it with the noise from the AC, telling myself that we are safe and to carry on whatever we're doing. I remind it's none of our business, but it feels a lot different lately. I could keep going on but I don't think so. No. The housing market where I live is for the rich people, unless you're selling your house and buying another. Impossible. Apartments are hard to come by. My neighbor is inconsiderate, entitled, mad, doesn't work and starts trouble. She slams doors, yells and scream at bf and it can go on for hours. The list goes on, I'm trapped, it's triggering, unpredictable and my anxiety is more intense since she yelled at me trying to start a fight but I kept walking choosing not to hear anything but inside, I was scared. I still am. Neighbor is familiar to our police department, not in a good way. Drugs, burning the neighbors yard with an illegal burn. Pack rats, leave trash around the property, smokes cigarettes inside which is definitely not allowed, none of them work, throw cigarettes butts on the porch, and the list goes on. I've never been this miserable at "home" and work isn't much better either. Anyone else feel this way?

 

[PamelaS]

I think everyone has their own definition of what they call "home." My definition of home is safe, a place where you can be yourself but it comes with a lot of responsibilities. My point, I dislike our apartment neighbors for many valid reasons. I'm trying to deal with it with the noise from the AC, telling myself that we are safe and to carry on whatever we're doing. I remind it's none of our business, but it feels a lot different lately. I could keep going on but I don't think so. No. The housing market where I live is for the rich people, unless you're selling your house and buying another. Impossible. Apartments are hard to come by. My neighbor is inconsiderate, entitled, mad, doesn't work and starts trouble. She slams doors, yells and scream at bf and it can go on for hours. The list goes on, I'm trapped, it's triggering, unpredictable and my anxiety is more intense since she yelled at me trying to start a fight but I kept walking choosing not to hear anything but inside, I was scared. I still am. Neighbor is familiar to our police department, not in a good way. Drugs, burning the neighbors yard with an illegal burn. Pack rats, leave trash around the property, smokes cigarettes inside which is definitely not allowed, none of them work, throw cigarettes butts on the porch, and the list goes on. I've never been this miserable at "home" and work isn't much better either. Anyone else feel this way?

Sorry for your struggle Punky. Sounds hard. We can only do what we can do. The housing problem in my area is bad too. Forced me and my son to go back to the house with abusive husband. Some things we can change. Other things we need to learn how to live with it. If you have to live with the situation, then consider random acts of kindness to turn the tide. It will take a lot of time, effort and patience, but it might actually make the situation bearable. We never know how the person will respond, but they will be curious as to why anyone is being kind to them, when they know they don’t deserve it. I’m not saying that you should allow them to walk all over you. Using boundaries to protect yourself along with undeserved kindness has allowed me to find safety. Yes, walk away when they attack you, but it might be worthwhile to repeatedly do random acts of kindness when they are not attacking you. I feel for you. It’s not an easy situation. No guarantees. I’ll be praying. Keep us updated.

Sorry for your struggle Punky. Sounds hard. We can only do what we can do. The housing problem in my area is bad too. Forced me and my son to go back to the house with abusive husband. Some things we can change. Other things we need to learn how to live with it. If you have to live with the situation, then consider random acts of kindness to turn the tide. It will take a lot of time, effort and patience, but it might actually make the situation bearable. We never know how the person will respond, but they will be curious as to why anyone is being kind to them, when they know they don’t deserve it. I’m not saying that you should allow them to walk all over you. Using boundaries to protect yourself along with undeserved kindness has allowed me to find safety. Yes, walk away when they attack you, but it might be worthwhile to repeatedly do random acts of kindness when they are not attacking you. I feel for you. It’s not an easy situation. No guarantees. I’ll be praying. Keep us updated.

I also remembered something that my son and I both do to keep her sanity. We wear earbuds or headphones all the time. That way we don’t have to hear what we don’t want to hear. Hope this helps.

 

[lucky duck]

I think everyone has their own definition of what they call "home." My definition of home is safe, a place where you can be yourself but it comes with a lot of responsibilities. My point, I dislike our apartment neighbors for many valid reasons. I'm trying to deal with it with the noise from the AC, telling myself that we are safe and to carry on whatever we're doing. I remind it's none of our business, but it feels a lot different lately. I could keep going on but I don't think so. No. The housing market where I live is for the rich people, unless you're selling your house and buying another. Impossible. Apartments are hard to come by. My neighbor is inconsiderate, entitled, mad, doesn't work and starts trouble. She slams doors, yells and scream at bf and it can go on for hours. The list goes on, I'm trapped, it's triggering, unpredictable and my anxiety is more intense since she yelled at me trying to start a fight but I kept walking choosing not to hear anything but inside, I was scared. I still am. Neighbor is familiar to our police department, not in a good way. Drugs, burning the neighbors yard with an illegal burn. Pack rats, leave trash around the property, smokes cigarettes inside which is definitely not allowed, none of them work, throw cigarettes butts on the porch, and the list goes on. I've never been this miserable at "home" and work isn't much better either. Anyone else feel this way?

You deserve peace and to feel safe ...you need to call the police every time there is noise after 10 pm ...you should keep a diary of every event..time date what was said ...report to landlord ... tell the land lord you are on there side ..you know it takes a lot to get some one removed ...that you know he only wants tenants that fallow the rules and respect his property and you want to work with him to create a record of every infraction so am to build a case ...take photos .. and dont give up!!! Good luck and god bless...