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My diary of random thoughts

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Depression, anxiety, depression, anxiety, depression, anxiety...it just doesn’t go away. My life is just going in circles and I can’t stop it. Please someone, just rescue me!!! I can’t take it, but I have to because it’s life! I can’t take it anymore. It’s so debilitating
 
I hate being called crazy!!!!! I may not be the smartest person, or the prettiest person, but I was set up and I suffer from severe depression and anxiety because I am a loser that is always alone!
 
How do you find yourself and be happy when the whole world has told you that you’re a piece of shit??? Oh, I know...you believe it
 
All I want is to get married again! I mean omg! How hard is it to find a relationship??? It’s been 7 years! Seven!!!!! What the hell! I can’t get along with anyone???? No one wants me???? My parents brainwashed me? I mean good GOD!!!!
 
My whole life is going down the drain! I made some really really bad bad decisions and I have no friends! I just want to live by my sister and get the hell out of here!
 
My life is pretty much over. It was all lies because I couldn’t line up with anything. I don’t fit in, I have no real friends, and somehow it’s my fault. I married a narcissist and everything I knew was fake. How do you deal with that? How is it that one day you wake up, a person doesn’t want to be with you and NOTHING works out the way you wanted? You can’t even concentrate. You try and it doesn’t work out. How is this even possible? No one can help with that. Not one person can help with anything. Everyone just keeps telling me to do this or that and nothing works out. No new friends, and coronavirus made it worse. I am constantly used too. What the hell.
 
Is your therapist helping?
No, nothing helps because I cannot get my life back on track. I feel like crap. No one wants to be my friend and I see what I went to- basically a poor, I respected piece of crap that cannot get better. I don’t feel right. She can’t help with feelings. I ask, and all she does is talk about trauma. Well, how do you feel differently? That is what I need to do without letting my life fall apart even though it is
 
No one can seem to help me get over the past and find something new. I am scared to move on in a way. Everything is just messed up. I am mentally overwhelmed with trying to keep up, I can’t focus and the more I can’t focus, the more my life falls apart and the more I can’t focus.
 
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