Lionheart
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I slept deeply and well
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probably the friend or foe thing in an instant like to protect your brothers or go to prison decisions in an instant. This fear of losing brothers or losing family from there and at home all can change with one squeeze is very hard to turn off. This bothered more these days I think than the event itself. This pressure of do or die or do and jail haunts many of us for years. Now I am all good. live away from people. so not like public. and fight or flight is the latest lesser mental stress after getting better about the possibility of mistakes. The ones when I was right do not haunt me. The ones I never knew did for while and after 16 years retired the ones I that may have been wrong have never come back. They spent allot of money teaching us to turn it on yet did not spend a dime teaching how and when to turn it off. I think I have it easier than most for I have been the mean looking, sounding, smack a jerk biker for life so was ok to be an ass towards others when got home for that is who i was when before I left. I wish you smoother nights for sure. I beat the crap out of a body bag until weak tired and this curves the hell of of the dreams. the mind is tired when the body is exhausted.I keep shooting people in the head in my nightmares. I kind of recognize them but I can't name them. I...
probably the friend or foe thing in an instant like to protect your brothers or go to prison decisio...
I understand. Sorry the husband doesn't really get it. yet most do not. It is not dwelling for we cannot tell the mind what is approved thinking. The new son will take allot of time so this may help keeping the mind busy. Busy mind with todays life can help the mind not have to much time for yesterdays. That is cool on the little one. They are the reason we do what we do and did for sure. He is a great reward for your service. way cool. I find not telling others who have not been there for me is better. Most just cannot understand the depth of it all and there for just think we are a little weak minded. If they lived it they would understand. I just tell others I have allot on my mind right now that I working through so if I seem quiet for a bit this is why. All here today is good just processing and filing some stuff in an effort to put it away. I wish you smoother days ahead and look into the new ones eyes allot for there is comfort in there for sure.I was military, and I did lose a number of buddies. I don't think the dreams are about that. The men I...