Red, You Get Your Wish, At Least Partially.

[Barberian]

I don't know how this will be read, but it's not being written with anger, just frustration.

I agree Jimmy, to a point. Knowing that there is someone here who hates me and wants to piss me off. Being around someone who takes great pride and pleasure in putting me down and insulting my lifes experiences. I can't help but take this very personal. I haven't written about everything that has happened to me, and I often do a poor job when I try. As far as I'm concerned this isn't a competition, and haven't put a great deal of effort into it. The problem for me is I get pissed off before I even log on. I get pissed off if I even think about the forum. I have anger management issues as does almost everybody on this forum. Coming to a place that pisses me off is counterproductive. I fully understand how this forum is dif than the civ forum, and why this one is here. I see vets post on the civ site and let them know about this site, the membership req here, and tell them why this site is here, vs the civ site - We have our own version of the world and don't play nice with civilians usually.

I don't mind an occasional argument, or difference of opinion. Hell,that's human nature. That's multiplied when you toss a bunch of people with PTSD into a room. But we usually get along well here because of a common experience, and respect, even if it was experienced in a different way, or in a different war. There was a thread a month ago or so about why this forum works. Lots of people posted in it. Link Removed . This is what I like about this forum.

I've mentioned I have some OCD characteristics. I've tried ignore on other forums. As a conversation progresses then suddenly doesn't make sense, I wonder if it's because of an ignored post. I then have to un-ignore someone to check. It drives me crazy if I don't check. It may not make sense, but that is just one of the joys of OCD characteristics.

I appreciate the above supportive posts, thank you. I'd hit like on all the posts, but that, to me, would seem insincere. I'm not completely leaving, I'm just stepping WAY back for a while. If something strikes a chord, or I feel a strong need to post I might. Not visiting here many times a day will be very difficult but will help.

 

[Jimmy1]

Barb, as I tell my children. Not everyone will like you in this world, that's a given. Even the our bosses, some like us, some hate us and for no reason.

If you use the 'Ignore' button, you can't see a word they write. Isn't that what you want.

You ask the boys that have been on here nearly as long as me, I spent months being the piggy in the middle with a lot of new veterans. Do you know how hard it is to be impartial when you have PTSD.....

Look Barb, what you do is up to you.

 

[JarHed]

Do you know how hard it is to be impartial when you have PTSD.....

Impossible. It's hard enough to get along when you don't have this shit.

 

[HereticCurt]

JarHed, I see where you're coming from with that. The beast tends to make people view me like someone that isn't approachable.

 

[dutchiedelta]

As a general remark only. The beast does not prevent anyone from seeing the real us.
The beast is part of us and most of us try to keep it on a leash.
Emotional scarring changes a person. Alter chemistry, alters a character.
It cannot be seen as a detached entity that just gets in the way.

Barberian you have come a long way from smashing stuff. You'll grow further to being who you want to be.

 

[reddevil1111]

You were told to let it go and move on. YOU claimed you had. Then we get this shit about you deciding your not going to be on, but wait not exactly, your just not going to be on as much and I AM TO BLAME.

What kind of shit are you getting at Barbie? This amounts to two things.
1) a pity party your having for yourself.
2) your kicking the pot and trying to build additional strife in the site by keeping this shit alive.

Yet you claim your taking the high road. What a LOAD OF CRAP!

I have known assholes like you in the service. I got lucky as most didnt last in my unit. They saw it was different and shit bags were not welcome. Your the kind of guy who filters through the cracks and complains the whole time.
I am willing to bet you always had an excuse for not doing a good job. For always missing the shit details.

In the Marines we call your kind skaters. You know, the kind of guy who skates through life and does not contribute.

i know why you had such a hard time in the service. So do you. Funny thing, you cant really hide it from others that served. You can try like your doing but it wont work well.

you attack me yet again and you think you managed to do so in a way that your ass is covered.

You are a yellow son of a bitch for doing it. f*ck you!

The only reason you posted this crap is to figure out who still buys into your poor little me shit. Oh and to get in a dig on me. You posted like you were the bigger man and you would forgive me....then you post this crap and keep it going. I am shocked you weren't banned.
Keep up the attacks. Show your true colors. i am open, honest and truthful. Your the exact opposite.

This kind of shit shows you for what you really are.

 

[JarHed]

Ok, it would seem that you two, and you know which you two I refer too, have had your say about each other. I'll ask you both to just step back and leave it be. You're not going to be friends, buddies or sing cumbaya together. That said, please just push the ignore button and be done as this stuff doesn't really help anyone and for sure not you two either. You can't like everyone in this life or get along with everyone, nothing new about that. So, just do yourselves a favor and let it go. I think you'll both be better off if you do. Just my opinion here, of course.

Life's way too short for drama.

 

[reddevil1111]

I agree. I waited for someone to give him a hint. Here is where I get angry. I get called out for saying I have an issue. He claims he is the better man and he "forgives me" then he posts this crap. Its inflammatory to say the least.
Why didnt someone care to say stop to him? Or tell him he is out of line?
Is it only to tell me I should not reply to his attacks?
Why is it only after I reply that we are told to behave?
This forum is showing some favoritism IMO. This was posted on FRIDAY at 2pm. No reaction other than to tell him he is a nice guy.

So here goes.... I dont care about the asshole. I had him on iggy before and I figured I could take him off after a while. Kind of a forgive and forget process. Yet here I am again thinking I cant get a fair shake.

You can spray paint a turd any color you like, its still a turd.

If I had created this thread I can bet I would have been banned. Go back and read all the digs and attacks he makes on me. Veiled or not. Hell the title of the thread is bad enough.

Where is the moderator that cares to reign him in? As you can see, I read this thread and avoided posting anything for some time.

No moderator found fault with his actions. Thats crap!

Then he get the poor little me card out and tried to gather some support. Did anyone not read what he wrote? He attacked me. And everyone tells him he is such a nice guy and he should stay.

Thanks for that.

Lets be clear Barbie... I have said its not a dick measuring contest.regardless of your claiming that it is. i have also said I dont think you belong in here. I am allowed my opinion. You think you should be in here and that you have "combat" PTSD How you were never in combat but you still have combat ptsd?!. An aircraft carrier? Really? Come on man! Your insulting those that were in combat. Thats my view and I am entitled to have it.

Trying to gather other members and get them against me....why? Why declare your not coming around much anymore? Why attack me when you were told to stop it?

Why is the forum giving Barbie leeway and telling me to shut up? I am voicing concerns that are valid. Did the aircraft carrier earn a combat award? or just the aircrews that were in combat? How does a guy who is floating 100 plus miles off the coast surrounded by other ships get COMBAT PTSD?! From Metallica? That was his claim not mine.

He claims his PTSD comes from a hostile work environment. I wonder...based off his own words in here how thats possible he is such a nice guy after all.

Its pure Bullshit that this thread was allowed to be up in the first place. And then you guys give him support and tell him he is a great guy all the while its a thread based on attacking me DIRECTLY. Think I am pissed with the moderation of this site right now? You betcha!

I would ask the member of this forum to go back and reread the posts in this thread. But change one thing. put your own name in place of mine. While you read the posts, see the insults. Not just the TITLE of the thread but Everything he has posted in it. How would you react to the things that he has said? And then see the support he has when he says poor me I might post less. He is asking members to take sides in his argument with me.

Again, is anyone still wondering where most of the guys that used to post in here have gone? Dont care? Its all about the new guys right? f*ck the guys who were in here. We are just unreasonable and bigoted. RRRRIIIGHT.

Allow anyone in here if thats what you want the site to be. Stop saying its for combat vets if its not. The VA does not recognize the carriers as being in combat so why do we? The PLANES were in combat. No one shot at the ship. i bet you have tried to get compensation from the VA and been told no haven't you Barbie? i wouldn't doubt your using time in here to gather info one how to act to try to further your claims with them. Thats the real reason your in here is it not?!

Just stop the bullshit.

Im done with this post. This thread. This argument. But dont keep attacking me... i might get mad. I dont have a lot to lose. And im getting tired of your crap. Quit f*cking with me.

And maybe the moderators might want to reevaluate allowing one member to attack with no recourse only to admonish both when after two days of patiently waiting for someone to say this thread is shit. Shame on you for not stopping this, shame on you for telling me to behave when its his thread, his attack and his attempt to cause shit. I am defending myself. Or is that not allowed? After all, no one cared to do it for me.

 

[dutchiedelta]

Red, anyone with PTSD and allowed in here has my support.
I am not aware how most members got traumatized. It sure isn't up to me to ask anyone either.

There are different views on what defines Combat PTSD maybe.
All that matters (to me) now is understanding that some people have too much bottled up emotion to keep inside.
Regardless of who they are, they matter equally to me as everyone in need of ... you name it. Different people, different needs.
Your anger just tells me things are likely on top of you now.
As for anyone I hope this place and the people here can be of help to you. So much anger isn't helping you so pm if you need another way or just a distraction.

 

[JarHed]

I'll say it here so everyone knows, the admin stuff is something that I was asked to do when necessary. If you think of me as an admin first and then as me, JarHed, well it's reversed. I'm just me, a guy that's f*cked up, had issues, has f*ckin' PTSD and other stuff too. I'm no different than anyone else here; just struggling everyday to get through. I wouldn't and couldn't possibly know what some other are going through and I wish I could do something to help. Truth is I can't and I hate that I can't.

I don't come here much any more, just don't. So I'm ignorant of a lot of what's going on. I just don't have my finger on the pulse of things like I used to. That's just the way it is. If there is a problem with someone I'd suggest two things; one, hit the ignore button, that can help and two let Anthony know what's going on. He's the Ultimate Authority here and will make the final decisions about things.

If you have a problem, pm someone you feel you can talk to or to me, I'm a good listener. At least I think I am. I can be an asshole too so, ain't perfect. We're just not all gonna' get along for what ever the reasons. If my timing here was poor, sorry about that.

Jar

 

[reddevil1111]

Jar, When I say admin I mean all admin not just you. Somehow this whole thread has been allowed and it shouldn't have imo. i have let the big guy know. Maybe he is sick of me and he will just allow it. I have no clue. I thought direct attacks are against the rules. Everyone seems to ignore his infractions and call me out as they dont like what I have to say.

Its easy to disagree with someone. Its harder to stand up for what you believe is right in the face of objections. Somehow people think this is about measuring dicks. Maybe its due to his claims that it is. Its not. Its about being honest. Its about getting rid of a long term troll that hides under the guise of belonging.

Like I said, he is not alone. There are others. Two more I know of. I dont agree that he is a combat vet. i think a guy washing dishes in camp victory that takes incoming is a combat vet. I dont think an aircraft mechanic on a carrier 100 miles out to sea with 10 other ships surrounding his ship... working in a "hostile" work environment is combat ptsd. He never was in danger that constitutes combat. The military even says so. The aircrews that flew were in combat. The airplane mechanics never were shot at. Never risked life or limb. Other than the normal duties they had to perform. The term combat is defined in Oxford dictionary as: http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/us/definition/american_english/combat

If you had served in something where life was at risk, where your being shot at THAT is combat. If your ship fired guns, or was shot up that IS combat.
Fixing planes and being forced to listen to music you dont like is not combat. Having a disagreement with a coworker on that carrier is not combat. Normal carrier operation Re: launching and recovering planes is not combat. Repairing planes broken that flew in combat is not combat.

This is not about his PTSD. Though I do doubt he has it, I only argue that this site is not where he should be. I am allowed my own opinion. i think having to listen to his claims of how hard he is affected... it grates on my nerves. I think about others who come in here and listen to him and leave due to the dilution of the sites' integrity. They see we allow anyone in and they leave.

Lets refocus on my complaint. He attacked me openly and nothing was done about it. NOTHING.

If thats what you support, expect the same treatment by others. Dont ever question ANYONE else attacking someone. Or their right to be here. A lot of you were pretty hypercritical of a new poster being in here. Yet you defend this guy and dont question his ability to be here.
Pretty messed up. i see a lot you defending barbie and the same day attacking someone else. thats calling the kettle black ya?!

 

[reddevil1111]

And I am angry. i have been in here for a long time. I dont say things lightly. I try to be fair. i try to play by the rules. You dont have to like me.
I dont give a f*ck if any of you do.

I just expect equal treatment of EVERYONE in here. And I would ask all trolls and wannabe's to leave. Thats all.

I get attacked and no one says shit. Except that he is such a nice guy and you beg him to stay. WTF?! If I attack someone I am told f*ck off or risk a ban. He does it and you shower him with love and hugs. FFS! Like YOU would not be mad as well?!