Self Pity, Attention Seeking And Not Trying

[TheObserver]

In re-reading my post, I suppose I can see how it could be interpreted in so many different ways.

I came here,read posts,felt sad and decided to say something,nothing more,nothing less.

What I said was true though,and it really makes me sad to see these people are still in the same rut.

I suppose I should probably keep my thoughts and opinions to myself next time I visit though.

 

[sun seeker]

I suppose I should probably keep my thoughts and opinions to myself next time I visit though.

Or instead, you could say something kind and encouraging. Spread some good feeling around instead of criticizing. If you dropped by and said "hey, I haven't been around for a while, this is what I've been doing and it's really helping me" it would probably go over a lot better.

 

[joeylittle]

One thing I like to see is more success stories and posts on how problems, symptoms, adversity, etc. were overcome or managed. So if you've made great progress instead of passing judgement or bringing negativity to the forum, share the success and give people ideas,

@intothelight - you are a class act, all-around. This is perfectly stated.

I suppose I should probably keep my thoughts and opinions to myself next time I visit though.

No, but you could leave your judgements behind. Also, you might want to make communication styles your next area of mental-health focus. This statement is rather passive-aggressive and/or attention-seeking. The forum values opinion. No-one responds well to judgement, and your first post was laced with it.

 

[Dana1010]

@TheObserver, I'm certainly willing to reconsider my first response to your post if you write something honest and useful about what has helped you recover. We are all really interested in getting better, so any advice you have would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Neverthesame]

I won't lie, an awful lot of swear words just went through my head in a couple of seconds. But, none of them are really productive, so here's all the other words that were mixed in.

First off, I am glad you are better. Really, I am.

Secondly, I just can't get my head around the point. Why do you feel this was necessary to do? Surely you must remember how miserable this is to live with, not to mention how isolating it feels to be told to suck it up, hike up your big boy pants and get on with life. Speaking strictly for myself, I know that it is because I want to believe it. I want to suck it up, get me arse in gear and go back to the life I used to lead. I want to be riding an ambulance, taking calls, and helping people. Not sitting at a desk in a dime a dozen warehouse job.

Whenever I see an ambulance roll by down the street, which is several times daily (I literally work next door to a fire hall). Besides the standard anxiety from a trigger, I get an overwhelming sense of shame. Why? Because I have to be at a distance, that is what I wanted to be. That was supposed to be my life, so much I want to be there. There is this intense pull to do it. Go to school, get recertified, put out my resumès, put MY uniform back on and live my life.

Now this of course is what I want. The reality of it is even after 11 years, I would probably succumb to a panic attack within the first 5 minutes on scene of a MVA. Why did I go into all of that? Not for your pity, that's for damn sure. I will take a wild stab here and assume, you think I am not trying hard enough. Fine. Clearly you can do better.

One last thing. If getting better, involves having to anonymously take a proverbial poo, on all the people who aren't as efficient at self help. Then (and I never thought I would ever say this, seriously this is a unpleasant thing to put into words.) I hope to never make a total recovery. Just getting rid of the anxiety, depression and guilt. Aught to be good enough.

Wish you well, careful not to fall off your laurels. It's a long way down from where your sitting.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

What I said was true though,and it really makes me sad to see these people are still in the same rut.

I think you're confusing fact with opinion.

Can you please share what worked for you since you have healed?

I'm not sure if you truly have moved on as you claim if you continue to come back and read posts on the forum. I think that if you can make these statements about the same people being here, then you have indeed read quite a bit and this wasn't just a drive by visit. So, have you truly moved on? I mean I know when I move on from something, I don't go back....when I move on from an ex, I don't continue to dip my toes in that lake...

 

[NarcSis]

Everyone is so nice, so accommodating....expletive, expletive, you expletive-expletive! How dare you cast judgement when many of these are THE very people who helped you "snap out of it"!!! Where would you be without the support they gave you?

It begs the question just exactly what it really was that you "snapped out of"!

Seriously? It's like a medic showing up for the fourth time to the same person attempting suicide and saying that they may as well shoot themselves next time!

You sir/ma'am are a callous human being and I pray healing does not turn me into that.

I think the entire forum deserves a public apology.

 

[Queen Boudica]

so this is an example of how you have healed come back and gloat. I suspect you are far from healed or a troll. take your judgement elsewhere I see a lot of strong people doing their best and learning trom each other not judging who has done better and why. as far as I am concerned I know I have come far in thr years I have been on here and some of that due to support I've had on here. I have bad days I come and rant as do we all just like you

 

[Chava]

it really makes me sad to see these people are still in the same rut.

Yeah, I'm not buying that.

Reminds me of the lady at AA meetings who complains about the other lady leaving the hospital and continuing to drink. My thought about the one judging her was that she wasn't a real alcoholic but just for friendship or something. Or maybe she thought she was a "better" alcoholic. WTF

 

[Jen93]

All non guests:

Please keep hands and feet away from the cage and do not feed the troll. Thank you. ;)

 

[Neverthesame]

I would like to say one last thing. Not too our guest, but to everyone else.

Thank you. Without the lot of you, I don't know where I would be. To know that there are lots of people out there that understand the way I often feel. I know I have found great support here, and I try to offer it to others as much as I can.

For me, being able to give someone a bit of the benefit of what little wisdom I possess, is a great feeling. To be helpful, even in the smallest way, is such a wonderful thing.

As someone who has had their own sense of purpose put on the back burner of life, being able to do anything like that. Makes me feel like a person, not just some guy running out the clock.

Once again, thank you all.

 

[Lionheart]

I have been a member for 6 years and have thought several times of leaving, but the truth of the matter is that I suffer from 6 chronic illnesses besides having complex PTSD.

My brain wants to channel old emotional pain into physical symptoms and so I have struggled a lot. I believe that I have benefited in many ways from the support that people who struggle with this illness have shared with me.

Hopefully, I am giving something of value back to this community by sharing my failures and successes. At any rate, it is hard to come here and feel as if I am being judged as somehow, "less than" when I have been told from a very young age, exactly that......that I am 'not good enough', 'not worthy', etc.

Am I attention seeking? No, I think not. At least not more than anyone else who is in need. I am sharing from my heart all that I can to help myself and other heal from PTSD.

Am I stuck? Maybe, I am in some ways..however,.perhaps, others here who know me would be a better judge of that.

Am I self -pitying? Lord I hope not!!!! I was stuck in self-pity early on before I began to heal and it was totally counter-productive. (However, when i think of it, in some ways it served a sort of protective function from all the pain that threatened to burst through).

Anyways, I think perhaps you have globalized and generalized all of us old time members into one group of attention-seeking, self-pitying victims......You can't be of much help to any of us who may be stuck if you are going to look down your nose at us!!!!