Weirdos on social media

[TruthSeeker]

Self-abuse is how it ended up feeling to me after a while. There's some things that trip my...

Self-abuse is a good word for it. A compulsion for a familiar feeling( even though negative) or a familiar entanglement leading to an emotionally charged situation. I try not to be impulsive-or seek self-abusive situations but there are times I’d like to chew someone out- it is so quiet and peaceful here- why screw that up?

 

[Deleted member 46752]

@Bkinder - Well said

Self-abuse is how it ended up feeling to me after a while. There's some things that trip my...

"I must consciously choose to not let myself go there when I know it's likely going to wreck my nervous system and cause even more stress. If I'm already feeling super antsy and on edge, I know that social media, and usually the internet as a whole, is somewhere I shouldn't be in the moment, so I choose less screen and more green and head outside, instead." I strongly relate to those sensations and advice

 

[TruthSeeker]

I've posted I have things and people behind imaginary doors. The doors have a knob on one side...my side. I have control whether I want to get abused by opening the door....or stay with the known....nothing is being stirred up at that moment. I know shit will fly if I open certain doors, others have potential for chaos.....much of the chaos in my life is my choice. If I open certain doors, it is certain re-traumatizing and will take weeks to get back to a balanced life.....and other doors a 75% chance of being triggered and ruining only a day or two. That is usually a negative enough thought to keep me from being stupid and chasing trauma by opening doors with chaotic issues on the other side.

Along with that, I have done things to actually limit potential problems....gotten rid of my landline and changed cell phone numbers, given the unwelcome family an email all their own....and I rarely check it...I've tried to put potential chaos at a distance and enhance safety measures so it doesn't ruin my day. This is how I handle those....I'd really like to go back....maybe things have changed moments...leopards don't change their spots...and they eat people, too. ;)

 

[Deleted member 46752]

Thanks for the responses everyone your insights are of great value sending good vibes only

I've posted I have things and people behind imaginary doors. The doors have a knob on one side...my sid...

Do you know if it is possible to not have your info exist online? In particular residence

 

[TruthSeeker]

Once you are there, you are there! Online I mean. Going to social media, getting a traffic ticket or in trouble with the law, signing up for particular services, getting married or engaged (announcements in the paper), getting publically acknowledged, having your photo taken, joining a club, and spending a lot of time on the computer will get you noticed.

 

[Neverthesame]

As far as I am aware, no. If you are on a register somewhere such as the IRS. You are on a database connected to a network of some variety.

How difficult to access that is? I really don't know. I imagine it depends on where your information is stored and who wants to know.

 

[TruthSeeker]

As far as I am aware, no. If you are on a register somewhere such as the IRS. You are on a databas...

What is known is listed in white pages and some cost $ and some don't. Our information can be accessed through sites that check all public records. All information on public records is accessible online and they list family members, x husbands and their families, and some relatives. Just try typing in your complete name....and see what comes up! Type in a family member's name, see what happens. If someone wants to find you, often they can if you Facebook, are online and buy online, have been in the newspaper or any civic clubs as a member, social forums, etc.
While this isn't true in all cases, we leave behind "fingerprints of info" on sites without realizing it or can be found in public documents.

 

[blackemerald1]

Well since fb and other services have either let info out or haven't used sufficient security to stop info., being stolen I don't think you can disengage and wipe out your identity completely.

Everyone/business seems to have a data base now and it is getting increasingly difficult to do anything or go anywhere without having a 'presence'.

Just think of maps/gps, your telecommunications carrier, utilities and bank? Everyone wants to know if you have a email address or your mobile phone number. One of these will be asked almost every time you ring for assistance.

Edited:- Also..your information/identity is now a commodity - with a price tag for a whole lot of entities re marketing etc., Is this good/bad/ugly - yes to all :)

 

[EveHarrington]

Maybe you should stay away from interacting with people you don’t personally know on Facebook given that site requires you use your real name. On other sites don’t use your real name and problem solved.

 

[blackemerald1]

Only part of problem solved Eve... Hackers/trolls can work backwards from one piece of identifying information and track down almost everything else about a person. Forgotten what it is called..but it has a name..and I am having a blank. So..removing your name sort of helps but other bits of info can get the dedicated weirdo the same results.

However having said that...removing your name is a good start..

@TommySunlight - removing your residence from online would be very difficult once it is there. You could use a PO Box for ALL of your mail and notify everyone that has a database that your new address is that. However if you pay utilities etc., that is hooked up to your house you cannot get that removed from a database.

Anything that leads back to your address is probably going to be in somebody's database but whether or not the public can search it, even for money...depends on the them.

I could not imagine giving my physical address to fb...
I don't use social media..and am better for it:)

 

[EveHarrington]

Only part of problem solved Eve... Hackers/trolls can work backwards from one piece of identifying...

Most internet weirdos aren’t dedicated. Internet weirdness tends to be a “crime” of opportunity.

Taking the basic precautions is usually enough.

If you’ve got an internet presence, start by only having anonymous accounts. If you’re still having problems after that, then take additional precautions as these additional precautions cost money. There is no need to go hog wild and shell out tons of time and money if the basics will suffice.

 

[Neverthesame]

Anything that leads back to your address is probably going to be in somebody's database

Yup. If your a citizen of the US, CAN, UK, AUS... just to name a few. You are on a database. Doesn't matter if you don't even own a computer or phone. They store it electronically nowadays.
Short of moving to Timbuktu, there's no avoiding it.
Should be fairly safe though, at least safer than living in a country that still uses an AK-47 in lieu of a ballot box for leadership changes.

Most internet weirdos aren’t dedicated.

Thank God for that.

I don't use social media..and am better for it:)

@TommySunlight Best piece of advice you'll get about that.
Facebook is kind of like a cities communal well was a few centuries ago.
Sure, you could keep up with the latest gossip at a convenient place. The downside was, everyone shit in the same water, so you might get a bout of cholera to find out which of your neighbours got drunk and acted like an idiot last weekend. Or who is irritated at you for some perceived slight.

Not a great trade when you think about it.
Who really needs it?