I only remember nightmares

[Questioning]

I remember I used to have good dreams, happy dreams that made me feel good. For the last five years, I only remember having horrible dreams that disturb my mood for a while. They are dreams of me doing horrible things or me seeing my family or friends dying in a gruesome way.I have been missing limbs and had terrible illnesses in the dreams, I also have constant dreams about my sick best friend being normal and healthy, which are good until I wake up and then I wish the reality was different as I know this will never be true. These are one of the worst dreams I have. I wonder, why have all these happy dreams vanished and are dreams really a reflection of how I really feel. I have had anxiety and depression, but sometimes it feels like these nightmares make it a lot worse. The dreams are so realistic that sometimes I have a hard time adjusting that they are not true. I text people when I wake up and if they don’t reply, I panic as I think I ”know” my dream was real. When I wake up I just feel like everything is distorted and I feel sick for having the dreams I do.

 

[blackemerald1]

Hey @Questioning. I appreciate that you are remembering the horrible dreams, nightmares or even night terrors. I have them too. It's probably likely that you are not remembering the good or pleasant dreams so much anymore because the horrible ones are waking you up?

It seems that some of your upsetting dreams are centred around current situations like the ill health of your friend. Do you have dreams that are completely nonsensical or that have nonsensical aspects to them? I do. Often I have no idea why they will be so prominent in a nightmare but other parts (which I can recall are more realistic).

I don't understand the relationship between trauma, stress and dreams apart from a basic understanding that our brains are processing and 'filing' memories into other parts of our brain. That might be a completely wrong idea too.

However I do understand how upsetting and disturbing these types of dreams can be to your sleep. And on an ongoing basis these can be quite depressing. Have you considered undergoing a sleep study?

Have you tried to do a journal of your dreams? That can be interesting even if it doesn't necessarily stop them from happening. It may lead to some useful insights into what and when your sleep is being disturbed. Maybe a therapist might be interested in taking a look at it too?

 

[ChildofGod]

I am used to having chronic nightmares and lucid dreaming does help. I think all it means is that you learn how to control what you dream.

I had to fight back in my dreams. Thankfully I was able to get rid of that.
One thing, if I may offer advice, is to think of something pleasant to dream about. Or just think of something pleasant before bedtime and possibly other times if you wanted.

I don't know if talking about lucid dreaming is okay or not. I had a book about it a long time ago.

My other opinion is that we condition ourselves unknowingly (does not apply to everyone) to have nightmares, because that's all we focus on. I'm not sure if that will make sense to you or not.

 

[Questioning]

Hey @Questioning. I appreciate that you are remembering the horrible dreams, nightmares or even night terrors. I have them too. It's probably likely that you are not remembering the good or pleasant dreams so much anymore because the horrible ones are waking you up?

It seems that some of your upsetting dreams are centred around current situations like the ill health of your friend. Do you have dreams that are completely nonsensical or that have nonsensical aspects to them? I do. Often I have no idea why they will be so prominent in a nightmare but other parts (which I can recall are more realistic).

I don't understand the relationship between trauma, stress and dreams apart from a basic understanding that our brains are processing and 'filing' memories into other parts of our brain. That might be a completely wrong idea too.

However I do understand how upsetting and disturbing these types of dreams can be to your sleep. And on an ongoing basis these can be quite depressing. Have you considered undergoing a sleep study?

Have you tried to do a journal of your dreams? That can be interesting even if it doesn't necessarily stop them from happening. It may lead to some useful insights into what and when your sleep is being disturbed. Maybe a therapist might be interested in taking a look at it too?

Hey, thanks for the reply. Well, I agree that I must have nice dreams too, they just don’t stick to my mind like the bad ones do. And I do have very nonsensical dreams in which things happen that I would never expect to happen, but after those dreams I have the feeling in my head forever. Actually last night I had a dream about my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend, and he was also a serial killer, the night stalker, in the dream. i can kind of understand where this came from since I am very into true crime, but it was creepy nonetheless and I woke up not being able to sleep again. I have always thought that a dream journal could be a good idea, I have just never got around to it. And I am having a meeting with my psychiatrist in a couple weeks so I could mention it to her. Thanks?

 

[Questioning]

I am used to having chronic nightmares and lucid dreaming does help. I think all it means is that you learn how to control what you dream.

I had to fight back in my dreams. Thankfully I was able to get rid of that.
One thing, if I may offer advice, is to think of something pleasant to dream about. Or just think of something pleasant before bedtime and possibly other times if you wanted.

I don't know if talking about lucid dreaming is okay or not. I had a book about it a long time ago.

My other opinion is that we condition ourselves unknowingly (does not apply to everyone) to have nightmares, because that's all we focus on. I'm not sure if that will make sense to you or not.

Yeah it does make a lot if sense that we confition ourselves. I have a habit of thinking about all the things that bother me before I sleep, and this probably contributes. Lucid dreaming has been an interesting concept to me always, and I have had a few dreams where I felt I am truly in control. Do you have a thing that you do to make it more likely to lucid dream?